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10 years ago
EXACTLY. I know she is having sex with other guys. She knows I know she is having sex with other guys. But as soon as I ask her about how it is, she gives me the evil and won't say a word.
But if I so much as mention that I might be going out with someone else, she freaks on me. She gets totally jealous and pissed.
It is all a mystery to me too.
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10 years ago
Oh yeah. My stripper GF told me she was sleeping with other guys. I think she did it to get my attention, make me jealous. Not exactly a healthy relationship right? I wasn't assuming anything although I was a bit curious why she was constantly checking her texts while we were at dinner and even at night when we were having sex together. When I finally called her on that she would have to go to the bathroom and for a long long time. The only time I got a chance to look at her phone it was amazing how many guys she was getting e-mails from. "I love you" "baby" etc etc. She didn't have many girl friends. From what I could tell she was kind of obsessed with guys.
Again, I was in this for the sex, and in this regard she did not disappoint.
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10 years ago
And to cyclops65. I am with alabegonz. That girl is a keeper. Shit nothing like that has ever happened to me. Don't get married though. That is just not a place any sensible man needs to go.
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10 years ago
And Btw getting an std test is something advisable to many people in casual relationships, stripper or not.
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10 years ago
I was dating her because the sex was really hot. It wasn't about respect. Maybe you forgot to read that part. Btw she liked it too.
Maybe all strippers aren't like my stripper gf but like I said in a previous post this is a strip club website so dudes on the site are kind of looking for stereotypes and that is the way I see it. Sorry if you dont agree.
I just don't see a lot of girl next door types in the strip clubs I have been to.
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10 years ago
Yeah, that was insightful Thanks for the post alabegonz. Humans are complicated and there is definitely a story on both the male side and the female side that makes sense, even though often those stories are very different.
My response, when dealing with a partner in this kind of situation is to remember a couple of choice phrases from Wittgenstein.
"If a lion could speak, we would not understand him"
Which for me leads to another Wittgenstein quote.
"Whereof one cannot speak, thereof one must be silent"
I have tried to talk things through many times with the women in my life and sometimes it is better to just let go of it and act. I think they appreciate that more anyway.
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10 years ago
And as for the guy who is taking a sabbactical and living off his medical professional wife,,if you can pull this off more power to you. This is not the type of relationship that usually lasts very long however. Women like it when the men bring home the goods. This programmed very deeply into their brains
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10 years ago
Well I kind of liked the idea of dating a stripper and I still do. And since this is a strip club website, I am going to take the liberty of calling her a stripper because that is what this discussion board is about, strippers and strip clubs. We are not talking love and relationship support group here. And yes, she was also a person and I always treated her like a person ie: with respect and kindness. I am just calling her a stripper here OK?
We had a lot of fun together, I helped her with her bills, and to me it was a lot more honest relationship than the one I had with my wife. See, my wife and I got married because we were "in love". Well in the end it turned out that the love part kind of wore a little thin. And when that happened I started to understand a little more deeply what was going on. See, she married me because I came from a family with some money, I went to a good college and I had good prospects. I am not saying she didn't actually love me, or we didn't get along or weren't in love because we were. There was just other stuff going on in the background that I was not really getting. In the end she left me because my salary didn't rise high enough for her to quit her job which she really wanted to do. She wanted to have a career as an artist. She told me I wasn't supportive enough and I was too worried about our finances. But we didn't have enough money because we sent our kids to private school, took nice vacations, etc and these were things which were her ideas! Ironically, in the end, it was her job that made it easy for her to walk out on our marriage.
And to complicate things a bit further here, I don't have any regrets. My wife is a fine person in most ways and she was a great mother to our children. We are still close and we are good friend. And once she pulled the plug, I was ready to go along.
To all of you young men out there that think marriage is about love, you are being very naive. Women are a lot more practical than that. Be careful.
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10 years ago
I sense that some of you divide women into two categories. Those who are P4P and those who are serious relationship material. I see it on more of a continuous spectrum. For centuries men with resources have had concubines and mistresses and those relationships involved more than just exchange of money. Both sides were able to draw emotional sustenance from each other, and could be sort of what we can "in love". Our culture idealizes romantic love and so you don't see many mistresses around today. But I think there is room for relationships that are more casual in nature, sometimes involve the exchange of money, and are emotional and physical.
In my particular situation my stripper GF and I were definitely emotionally involved. And as the individual with the more resources in the relationship I was happy to help her out financially. If you want to call that P4P I am fine with that. I am just trying to lay things out there like they happened for me.
I am about to stop helping her financially and I am very interested to see if she dumps me.
If anyone would like to weigh in on this we can do a little survey and I will report the results in a couple of months.
Question: Will my stripper/mistress/gf of four years dump me when I stop paying her DMV etc. bills?
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10 years ago
Hmmm. Maybe it sounded like I was boasting about it? The sex was really hot a lot of the time. So yeah dude, that part was really cool.
But overall I am not sure I would repeat it. It was a mixed bag for sure. I was going through a slow dissolution of my 20 year marriage at the time, so I guess you could say it was replacing something that I wasn't getting at home. But no, it wasn't fulfilling in a way that was lasting. And the more entangled I got with this girl's life, which was not so great, the more stressful it was for me.
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10 years ago
Than it does to us. Ask any married guy who has lost his job.
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10 years ago
As for love dating and money I used to be a lot more romantic and idealistic about that than I am now at 56. Women mix love and economic opportunity instinctively. It comes a lot more naturally to them than it
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10 years ago
Well it took her about a year before she told me she loved me. So I am not sure it was a "straight up hustle". We definitely had good chemistry. You can't fake that.
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10 years ago
You must be in your 20s. Be careful. Guys like you get taken advantage of.
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10 years ago
You are completely wrong about that. What do you think marriage is? Women fall for men who support them financially every day.
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10 years ago
You are right. Call it what you want I was helping her with money. I have no regrets about this. She needed the help and I got what I was looking for.
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10 years ago
Stay strong. Good luck.
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10 years ago
What is a hobbiest anyway? I go to strip clubs because it is easy to share a drink with a sexy half naked woman, and if I get lucky we might meet outside the club and have sex. Is that a hobbiest?
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10 years ago
I wasn't looking for a wife! And if I was I wouldn't be looking at a strip club. I was looking for some very hot sex and in that sense I was not disappointed at all. The rest of it took a lot of fortitude to put up with. I was able to keep it in per spective but buyer beware. If you are a caring person the drama can be a bit over the top.
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10 years ago
You can't count on many women. I am getting divorced after 20 years and I am really looking forward to being single. All this stuff you read about how you need to be romantic and listen to your wife or gf is just bs to me. They will move on when it suits them and they can.
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10 years ago
It's not about the stripper it's about you. Fortunately you understand who you are. I am really sorry but as you know it is the drugs that are going to kill you....or not. I despise 12 step programs but the San Francisco Zen center has a place you might want to try. It is called green gulch farms.
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10 years ago
Dude you have a son. It is not about her you and your ex stripper wife anymore. He is way bigger than that.
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10 years ago
I mean what do you do with someone who completely and totally and clearly cares about you with more intensity and clarity than anyone has ever cared about you before but she can't clean up her apartment and she never even gives you a card on your birthday.
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10 years ago
I mean what do you do with someone who completely and totally and clearly cares about you with more intensity and clarity than anyone has ever cared about you before but she can't clean up her apartment and she never even gives you a card on your birthday.
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10 years ago
I mean what do you do with someone who completely and totally and clearly cares about you with more intensity and clarity than anyone has ever cared about you before but she can't clean up her apartment and she never even gives you a card on your birthday.