ATF Wierdness

avatar for Dudester
Dudester
First there was Kat. She was actually a former porn actress, but a husband left her with a kid and bills. We had chemistry and a quarterly habit turned into a monthly appointment. Towards the end of our two year relationship the kisses became longer and more heartfelt. We discussed having a regular relationship. Suddenly, she changed everything, her club, her phone number, her address, and her habits. That's when **** swept in.

For the first fourteen months, it was a fun fling, our LD's getting more and more interesting. One night when I went, she basically threw me around the room, angrily declaring she wasn't doing certain things anymore because she had quit drinking. I went on a nine month fruitless journey to replace her.

The week of Thanksgiving I ran into her several times. She still stayed away from the sauce, but the fun was back. Then, suddenly, the ugliness returned. Even though she had made several calls to me, and returned several of my calls in a week's time, the silence began.

I decided I'd had enough of the headgames and I contemplated telling her off. Christmas morning, she suddenly called. I was in a movie and she told me she would run an errand, then call back.

I had worked all night, and went well into the day before I got so tired that I decided I needed the sleep more than anything else. It had been 2.5 hours since she had called. I turned off my phone and slept for five hours. When I awoke, no messages, nothing from her.

The call? She had told me that the club was open Christmas Day and there was a buffet. She had told me "You shouldn't be alone today."

In other words, "You're a pathetic loser, come spend money on me."

I stayed home. I will never give her another nickel, ever.

6 comments

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avatar for SuperDude
SuperDude
16 years ago
What did you expect? Many dancers are not socially stable or reliable people. Keeping appointments, being loyal, working toward a goal and finishing school are not part of the life plan of many dancers. That's why they work in an industry that gives them quick money, lots of attention and makes no intellectual demands. Having an ATF is usually and exepensive and unrewarding headache with heartache.
avatar for arbeeguy
arbeeguy
16 years ago
Sad story by Dudester. This sort of thing happens A LOT MORE THAN YOU WOULD THINK. Being in a pretty solid marriage I try hard to NOT get into an emotional relationship with any of the dancers. But I have occasionally strayed over the edge, and it just never works out. Dudester's story reminds me that: nine times out of ten she will break your heart if you let her. I think SuperDude pretty much nailed it. BobbyL has also discussed the futility of trying to establish a friendly relationship or a romantic relationship with an SC dancer. It ain't absolutely IMPOSSIBLE but it is the rare exception. Perhaps the best advice on this topic is "The Four F Rule": Find em, Feel em, Fuck em, and Forget em"
avatar for parodyman-->
parodyman-->
16 years ago
arbeeguy,

BobbyL is mentaly unbalanced. I doubt he is capable of a relationship with a woman. He sees this and it shows in his rantings. I wouldn't hold him up as anything other than a bad example.
avatar for DandyDan
DandyDan
16 years ago
Dudester-
I had a similar situation with a former ATF about 3 or so years ago. I'm still not sure what she was angry about, but she quit her club. I went on a vacation to various relatives in Minnesota and decided to check out some of the clubs I knew about in South Dakota, and there she was at one of them. I told her where I was staying and to call my motel room, but she just blew me off. It's like I was an unwanted piece of the past.
avatar for JC2003
JC2003
16 years ago
She missed your money, not you.
avatar for Dain
Dain
16 years ago
The vast majority of dancers are of the lower class, i.e. they have a very short time-horizon. This is the psychological condition that takes the familiar behavioral forms (little saving, lots of spending, need for quick money, emotional instability, no intellectual investment, etc.).
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