Cyberbullying, It's not just for breakfast anymore.

parodyman-->
In another thread arbeeguy wrote, "Let's start a wonderful thread on cyberbullying. I will have a few things to say once it gets going. But I'm not clever enough to start it myself." I think that you are full of shit. You are plenty clever enough arbeeguy, because you got me to do it.

How many of you think that my treatment of Shadowcat in particular is cyberbullying? Are you sure? Perhaps it is a response to his flippant attitude that he is the only one who knows what he is doing. His belief that everyone who does not kiss his ass is wrong or needs to be driven from TUSCL. Or maybe I am just tired of all the Racial slurs, the queer bashing, and other Archie Bunker like behavior that he seems to get a pass on. This is supposed to be a strip club forum not a good ole' boys Klan meeting.

I have been a member here for years. As far back as I can remember Shadowcat has gone out of his way to give me a hard time. Now that I along with a few others have been calling him out his shine has started to wear off.

Since the introduction of the ignore feature he has publicly been encouraging others to add me to their list. I find this to be more pussy behavior typical of a scared little man who is too feeble minded to discuss his differences.

For a lot of you this must be like going to see the Wizzard. You pull back the curtain and what you see is a sad, lonely little pervert in crusty silk shorts pushing buttons and pulling levers trying to get everyone to believe he is the supreme diety of TUSCL.

As for anyone else I have tangled with, it has only happened because you took a shot at me first. Sorry to break this to you but you can not comment on what or how I write, much less throw insults, and not expect me to reply. Don't get bent out of shape if you pick a fight you aren't able to finish.

Most of he time if you look closely, I comment on the posts I find interesting. I try to interject a little humor or add something helpful. I would perfer that was always the case. Sadly with some of the true cyberbullies here that won't happen. I refuse to be pushed out or run off.

30 comments

Latest

jablake
17 years ago

Perhaps cyberbeating is a better word. :) Or, cyberpublicservice. :)

parodyman-->
17 years ago
I can live with cyberbeating...
jablake
17 years ago
lol :)
motorhead
17 years ago
I don't know if it is cyberbullying, but my complaint is that it seems excessive. That gets boring to me. If you want to disagree with him, fine....write about it one, two, three times, whatever, but then let it go. And I've been a reader of this forum for almost two years, and I haven't noticed the racial slurs you allude to. I find many of Shadowcat's posts boring, so maybe I haven't read them closely enough, but I cannot recall any racist remarks.

Regarding the other thread, perhaps my use of the word "hate" was too strong. Sorry about that one.

jablake
17 years ago

The only "racist" comment by shadowcat concerned a story about a $5 black club he visited. What specifically was "racist"? He claimed that the black men could only afford disgusting fat dancers. I found his comment to be in extremely poor taste as well as being "racist" and I kept thinking about some of the wealthier black men at Angels who definitely preferred WHALE sized women. Here I'm getting dances from slim women and these men who I believe are far wealthier than me don't seem to have any interest in slim except to be polite. Who knows perhaps these black men weren't as wealthy as they appeared to be. I do know that they were spending fast and furious as well as being very generous.

Generally, I just try and ignore whatever he is posting about so perhaps there was other "racist" comments. Or, maybe it is just that I'm insensitive as to racial slurs---probably I'm more sensitive to anti-racism. :)





parodyman-->
17 years ago
What about "Jewing a dancer down?" That statement feels racist to me.
parodyman-->
17 years ago
Also, if you find this type of thread boring why not skip it? Why torment your delicate sensibilities reading it?
arbeeguy
17 years ago
Thanks Mr. Parodyman for starting this thread, and I am delighted that my suggestion led you to do it.

Personally, I feel that CYBERBULLYING does not refer to the bullshit that we read in these discussion posts, because (with a few notable exceptions) we are all anonymous. I was a victim of BULLYING in high school -- I was the impudent nerd, and the bully was a C- student who clearly loved to intimidate the less muscular, more academic types. One day he kind of went nuts after I flipped him the bird day. A couple of days later he was lying in wait to surprise me as I walked to school. He had a buddy to help out, although he could have polished me off easily without any help. I suffered "loss of dignity" and a broken nose. This happened in 1951 or 1952.

That is one example of BULLYING. I'm sure you all have first or second-hand experiences with BULLYING. Now -- what exactly is CYBERBULLYING and why do I think it almost never happens on this board? Because IMHO, the word BULLYING and therefore CYBERBULLYING refers to threat of personal harm. If you are anonymous and I am anonymous, you can insult me all you like and I can insult you all I like, but neither one of us is BULLYING. However, either or both of us may be insensitive jerks.

There have been a couple of examples of CYBERBULLYING in the news recently (the term is probably still evolving.) One of them resulted in a death, the other in a bad beating, which was videotaped by one of the perpetrators. The whole affair got onto The Today Show, and I am betting I am not the only poster who saw it. It was pretty grim. Basically, CYBERBULLYING -- IMHO -- can only occur when some or all of the participants know each other personally, and use web pages (possibly mass emails as well) to scare people, or to insult them so bad they decide to scare you or harm you.

One person's opinion.

After seeing further comments on this topic, I may have more to say about the long-standing and stupid (IMHO) brouhaha between Shadowcat and Parodyman. Both of whom I happen to respect, because I have read numerous reviews by both. As I mentioned in an earlier post in another thread on this same general area, I was guilty of insulting Mr. NJSCFAN a few months ago, and later upon reflection, was sorry I did it and I apologized to him. (He had PM'ed me, justifiably castigating me for my intemperate remarks.) Since I have learned that NSCSFAN along with Shadowcat and Parodyman and many others was posting intereting and useful reviews. IMHO that is what this site is all about, and these discussion posts are all pretty much what I said earlier -- bullshit. But there are notable exceptions. Sometimes they are humorous, and sometimes they are informative, and therefore I willingly put up with the bullshit.
arbeeguy
17 years ago
Grammatical correction to previous post -- sorry, didn't proof read carefully enough. It should read "flipped me the bird" not "flipped me the bird day".
arbeeguy
17 years ago
OK third time is the charm. I apologize. "flipped him the bird" is what I meant to say. Jeeeze. I will shut up now.
jablake
17 years ago
Correction: The only "racist" comment by shadowcat [that I recalled] concerned a story about a $5 black club he visited.

"Jewing down a dancer" could be contrued as a "racist" comment. Then of course there was the "flat ass" comment that some would declare to be "racist," which just imo seemed like telling like he sees it.
MisterGuy
17 years ago
You're not bullying him p-man IMO...just giving him an extremely hard tinme, which he's earned. :) Cyberbullying is the EXACT type of treatment that wondergrl experienced, which lead her to retreat, unfortunately, from this board. Kettle...meet pot everyone...

It's very true that scat routinely tries to cajole his "friends" into adding people to their ignore lists...I'm sure some of you reading this now have received IMs, PMs, e-mails or whatever to this effect from scat. This is, again simply IMO, pussy-behavior. I don't have anyone on my ignore list, nor will I likely ever...unless someone starts spamming the board with advertisments or the like. I'm not afraid to debate or engage in a discussion with anyone about just about anything. I try to stick to what I know as well though.

"Don't get bent out of shape if you pick a fight you aren't able to finish."

Amen to that...

"and I haven't noticed the racial slurs you allude to."

COME ON! You haven't been reading what's been posted here, period...I'm sorry, but it's true.

"He claimed that the black men could only afford disgusting fat dancers."

LOL...yea, saying that black men can only afford "cheap" dancers...this again from Mr. 2-for-$20 dances from every dancer that he meets...lol...again, kettle...meet pot... Could it be that some black men have different tastes than an old, white man from the South...hmmmmm...maybe, possibly?? Of course not, that would require having some kind of thought process and being open to the possibility that Mr. scat wasn't always right.

I, too, was bullied when I was a little kid, and, as I've said before, what I learned about that experience is that when bullying rears it's ugly head in any form...it must be confronted very, very strongly, which will cause the bully to back down almost immediately. Bullying is carried about by people that are insecure in their own right, period.
jablake
17 years ago

When I first saw men of any race (ITC or OTC) interested super sized women my knee jerk thought was well that is all they can afford or they're totally desperate. I mean I would pay money to keep these "ugly" women away from me if necessary. Well depending on the man it may or may not be true that he is settling for the best he can afford. The man might be wealthy and spending money freely and yet he is attracted to large women or tall women or whatever. One positive of strip clubs, imo, is that you can see there is a demand for different looks. Heck, some men aren't that focused on looks and are much more interested humor or intelligence or dancing skill or etc. Some large women have told me that strip clubs were a real esteem builder because you realize not every man wants a barbie.

Having said all of that stereotypes are sometimes right on target, imo. For example, I knew many of the customers at The Trap and there are certain types of (rare) looks that will be very much appreciated in the extreme. So, there is this dancer at Angels who in my eyes is just special in the extreme and yet she isn't getting attention that some of the "disgusting" women are getting. I tell her The Trap is where she will print money. I don't go around Angels telling the super hot dancers that they will print money at The Trap (most wont, imo); she might have been only the second dancer that I told that to. Finally, she goes to The Trap. Guess what? She is driving old white men (as well as younger white men) crazy and they're spending as high as $25 per song. At Angels she was struggling and only generally making $5 per song. Guess where she preferred working despite making much less? Angels. Yes, she doesn't comprehend that she has to be just about the money. Just because she is a dancer then presto her god is $$$$$$$$. (BTW, if a dancer claims to like me, my knee jerk thinking (most likely on target, imo) is that she is just doing her job to earn her money.)


Side note: At the time the dancer fee to work at The Trap was small compared to the dancer fee to work at Angels. So, this dancer was not only making a boat load more at The Trap, but her fees are way less at The Trap as well. Yet, when I talked with her, she is like yes there is a lot more money for her at The Trap and the fee to work is much less, but she just didn't like it. She liked Angels, but just wanted to make more money there.

motorhead
17 years ago
OK.....like I said, I really don't pay much attention to shadowcat's post.....I missed both of the remarks cited above. When I said I don't recall any racist remarks, I wasn't trying to defend him, I just didn't remember any. Apparently, I read neither of the threads with those comments.
now_starring
17 years ago
I have been on the boards for about 3 months so I am sure there is a lot of history I don't know about, however from what I have seen every time Scat makes a post Parody is there to insult him. I don't think Scat really cares or he would make a formal complaint. It just seem high schoolish, and while paraody may just have a really strong dislike for Scat it does seem like jealousy of some sort.
If Scat wants to brag about his conquest then let him brag. I personally don't care how many strippers he does/does not sleep with. I only care that he gives me some good info about the clubs he visits.
Shekitout
17 years ago
parodyman: At the risk of raising your ire, the correct phrase is "jew down"(not "Jew down") which from the early days of America means to haggle for a better price. I have just read that some Jewish people will use the phrase. Are you Jewish & is that why you find it offensive? Other than Shadowcat making reference to blacks not be able to afford anyone but fat dancers, what else in his remarks have been racist? Give it a rest. I have.
MisterGuy
17 years ago
Hey, even I don't know how far back the original dispute goes between scat and p-man. To assume that it must be all about "jealousy", I think, is just silly, and that plays right into scat's tired, little hands.

Shekitout: you are making a distinction without a difference...wake up. We KNOW what the phrase means & where it comes from...it means to "cheat". It's offensive no matter what someone's heritage is. Sure, the Jews have been scapegoats for many, many centuries...so why should it be news to any of us that they have many phrases attributed to them that are negative? They are ALL based on anti-semitism, period.

So, in this day and age, people are allowed to make a "few" obviously racist or anti-semitic remarks, and it's supposed to be no big deal to everybody? Is that the way things are cracker? LOL...give me a break!
jablake
17 years ago
It means to "cheat"? News to mean. I thought Jew down or jew down meant tough and intelligent bargaining or haggling. And whether some Jews liked or disliked the phrase to Jew down, that it could be used in a very positive sense. Yes, it could also be negative in the sense of being "cheap" or "unfair," but I don't believe in general it ever meant to "cheat" unless that is being used as synonym for "unfair."



jablake
17 years ago
Is "cracker" a derogatory term? :) Could be unless the person is a cracker and is proud of the term.
jablake
17 years ago
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.ph…


Yeah, I wouldn't take the urbandictionary as the last word, but it is more fuel for the fire.

http://www.freedictionary.org/?Query=jew…
http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Jew_down


Lastly, if 51% of Jews believe the term Jew down is fine and dandy, then does majority rule? Especially if 49% of Jews start crying non-stop and need counseling everytime they hear such a allegedly offensive term. I don't know how the typical Jew feels about the term, but it wouldn't surprise me if he or she thought damn straight Jew down is a positive phrase. And, yes it wouldn't surprise me if the typical Jew found it offensive.

motorhead
17 years ago
I saw a bit of the interview with Supreme Court Justice Anton Scalia last night on 60 Minutes........to quote:

"I attack ideas. I don't attack people. And some very good people have some very bad ideas"

I think WE ALL need to consider this when posting here.
Shekitout
17 years ago
MisterGuy: Fuck you with a capital F for your "cracker" remark. That's offensive to Southerners as "jew or Jew down" seems to be to you. "jew or Jew down" has never meant "to cheat" from all the definitions of the phrase that I have found.
MisterGuy
17 years ago
Exactly Shekitout!! I use a term (simply in order to demonstrate your hypocrisy to you) that is offensive to YOU and that's bad...someone else uses another term that is offensive and derogatory to others and that's OK with you. Check please...thanx for proving my point!

Yea, and Scalia also said that we just need to "get over" the fact that he and his conservative buddies on the Supreme Court handed the White House to their boy GWB in 2000...fuck him and the horse that he rode in on!
jablake
17 years ago

What little I know about Scalia, I detest. I'd love to hook him up to a polygraph. If his beliefs are honest, then I would probably feel more kindly toward him regardless of how he rules on a particular issue. I may be 100% wrong, but he seems like a rodent.










motorhead
17 years ago
Fine with me if you kill the messenger, just don't ignore the message......I just wanted to make a point about trying to be civil here, not stir up a political controversy. Perhaps I shouldn't have mentioned the source of the quote.
MisterGuy
17 years ago
Quotes without their sources are meaningless...
jablake
17 years ago
Hi MisterGuy,

Again, I disagree with your opinion. To wit: "Quotes without their sources are meaningless..."

The message can be far more important than the messenger! So Scalia mouths off and he mouths off some more and finally he says something brilliant. (Yes, this is hypothetical.) The source of the brilliance shouldn't really be what is important. The message if it is good should be what is important.

Unfortunately, too many people, imo, are authority directed. A big shot has to deliver the message or it has NO value: That is normal for most people, imo. A big shot ball player says Burger King is the best and a whole mess of the cattle class will believe. If President Bush says there are weapons of mass destruction then again a whole mess of the cattle class will believe. If the government says some idiocy like alcohol is addictive, then by god that has to be true in the eyes of many of the cattle class, imo.

I like to give credit where credit is do--definitely. But a good message should be capable of standing on its own merit, imo.

MisterGuy
17 years ago
Yet another pet peeve of mine (not that you asked) is when people quote others that they feel are more "famous", intelligent, or that have more "authority" on a subject than they are/do in order to try & prove a point that they were making. I'd rather that someone just say what they mean...which in this case would be "keep it civil". That's a fine point in and of itself...it doesn't need the backing of crook like Scalia IMO. Alcohol's not addictive...huh?
jablake
17 years ago
Alcohol isn't addictive to everyone. Not by a long shot. It is like if the nit wit government propagandizes that peanuts (collective noun) is deadly. Yes, sure they might be deadly to a certain portion of the population, but it ain't a general truth.

I got what may be real shocking news for you MisterGuy. Cocaine ain't addictive to everyone. Alcohol ain't addictive to everyone. Some of the "best" drugs are just boring for one person while another is not only addicted but they have a freaking orgasm over a drug that is imo about as exciting as taking a shit. Is gambling addictive? To *some* people. It sure as hell don't get my dick up even a little bit. Are hot girls addictive? YES, that is an absolute truth. You kiss a hot girl and I don't give a fuck who you are. YOU will be addicted. How do I know this absolute truth? I've experienced it first hand. You deny this absolute proof and you know what that makes you? An addict in denial. Only an addict will deny the truth of addiction.

O and you know why men pay for prostitutes? Don't be stupid and say for sex. The absolute truth is that all men pay for sex in order to oppress women. That is the absolute truth and if you want to get out of one of governments' "education" camps you better learn that idiocy and quick.

You do know what drug abuse is right? It is whatever the stinking goverment says it is. O no. Heaven forbid I'm "raging against the machine." :) I had a doctor tell me alcohol is addictive, no if ands or buts. I asked if he drank. He says sure. I say and you have to fight those urges to drink more and more right? It is just sooooo addictive. He looks shocked and says No, he can take it or leave it. I say, yeah but you're the exception; everyone is just clamoring for a drink, right? Suddenly he work up. I have a good portion of my family on my mother's side that is definitely addicted. They're the minority. Not as extreme as the peanut minority (which is supposedly becoming more common), but a minority nonetheless. I drank, and drank, and drank, and nothing. No cravings for alcohol. Nothing. I don't understand why they loved alcohol. I very much wanted to. Alcohol is a big nothing. I crave chocolate 100 times more than alcohol and supposedly chocolate isn't addictive. Isn't addictive to who?

MisterGuy
17 years ago
You win jablake...I'm done debating with self-described crazy people...whew...
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