OT: sex drive mismatch
ilbbaicnl
Keep it in my pants when I do OTC. If I were a stripper it would stand for I like big bucks and I can not lie.
My fav tells me she's given up finding a man she can take seriously, because they always cheat. She said she just looks for a man who's attractive and good about helping her with her bills, and it lasts while it lasts. She had one guy she really liked. but he had one huge flaw: he was very insistent that she be down for whatever sort of sex he wanted, whenever he wanted it. Even when she got home from the club after working a 12-hour shift. I told her I thought she was right that he was a serious asshole for expecting that from her. But, I also said, if you care about someone, you have to think about how you can meet them halfway, if the amount of sex in the relationship is leaving them frustrated. If a woman's too tired for even an HJ, it could potentially work to just slather a lot of lube between her thighs, and lie on her side facing away from her man. I don't feel like I'm being sexist to suggest this, as I've done foreplay and as much clit stimulation as was desired, on the occasions when I was the one not really feeling it. (Guys are easier wrt for foreplay, as often the amount needed is pretty much none.)
On the other, if I were with a dancer, I can see how it could be asking for trouble to try to do anything sexual, too soon after she had been lap dancing. I might start to blend together with the PLs in the club in her mind. Maybe that's part of the reason dancers generally seem to prefer to work 3 days a week at most. But they generally have to work Friday and Saturday to make the best money, and the weekend is when an SO working typical Monday to Friday business hours is most likely to feel "frisky". But I also think it's fair what strippers typically tell there SOs when reguested to stop dancing or dance less: get what I make yourself, and I'll be glad to accommodate your request.
What do youse think?
On the other, if I were with a dancer, I can see how it could be asking for trouble to try to do anything sexual, too soon after she had been lap dancing. I might start to blend together with the PLs in the club in her mind. Maybe that's part of the reason dancers generally seem to prefer to work 3 days a week at most. But they generally have to work Friday and Saturday to make the best money, and the weekend is when an SO working typical Monday to Friday business hours is most likely to feel "frisky". But I also think it's fair what strippers typically tell there SOs when reguested to stop dancing or dance less: get what I make yourself, and I'll be glad to accommodate your request.
What do youse think?
16 comments
If you want the relationship to last, there has to be compromise. The nature of relationships have changed, though. Couples used to have long term relationships in order to engage in the long term project of having and raising children. There are now large numbers of childless young people. There is not much reason to compromise to maintain a long term relationship in which no children are involved.
The complaints of your fav are valid but you need to be aware that she is picking the guys she is complaining about so if her relationships don't work out it may be partly her fault. She says she picks guys according to how handsome they are but it is the really handsome guys who are always having women trying to entice them into sex. Maybe she might want to pick a more average looking guy who is more likely to think she is the best he can do and will therefore be more likely to remain faithful and more likely to be reasonable in demands for sex. If she has a baby with one of these cheating good looking guys who all the other women are chasing after too, she is likely to end up alone. The average looking guys she snubbed before are not likely to be interested in her as a single mom at that point.
If I’m not getting enough from my SO, I’m not the type who begs. I vote with my feet and find someone who will accommodate me.
Strippers, strip clubs, escorts, brothels, porn, etc. were invented for the guys who don’t get it at home enough, and for guys like Dave Anderson who nobody would date to begin with.
@shadow, without knowing the individual dancer, I think when they talk about having orgasms at work, the smart money would bet it's SS.
The first is the natural divergences in sex drive between men and women, especially as she gets older and pops out a kid or 3. It happens, especially as they approach menopause.
The other is the impact of stripping on a girl's sexual drive. I've seen girls talk about this a lot on the pink site. I suppose that it's completely natural not to want to be pawed on at home after being pawed at by countless guys over a long day ITC. Moreover though I suspect that enduring that for endless weeks or months also has a cumulative effect.
There are no easy answers when these things happen.
If a stripper is being begged for sex for 8 straight hours at work all day, I'm guessing most don't want the same thing when they come home to their SO.
Or their nipples sucked or touched. Or her ass grabbed. Or any guy trying to touch her vagina. Or...
@shadow, without knowing the individual dancer, I think when they talk about having orgasms at work, the smart money would bet it's SS.
@ilba what is that SS term...? Smart money would bet its SS? Meaning what
But cougaring out is often less blatant for women. They find a buff young guy who knows how to give a good massage. It's often not important to them that the guy never touches their naughty bits. In fact, they may be more comfortable with it that he doesn't.
Rick and Ilba, so if strippers dont want sex or being touched at home, what are strippers SO’s like? Do they just play video games and masturbate all the time, or look for other women to sleep with...?