your opininions gentlemen please

Dude, Think about it. Do you go to strip clubs? Why? Do you really think that she can make money just by being pretty? Air dances? This is a sex business and anyone who thinks differently has not got the picture. Safe? Hardly. My advice, find another solution.

I would mostly agree with shadowcat. As for the safety aspect, that can be managed. I, personally have not known of a dancer being physically harmed, other than one bite from a customer. Even that made her a LOT of cash!

Depends basically on 1. How upscale the club is. 2. How she and her family feels about sex. Heck, in some families it really is a family affair and includes anyone else that happens to enjoy sex. In other families the woman shows a nipple and she is headed straight for a burning hell for eternity.

Thanks.I don't go to clubs,( my girlfriend would suspect). I am the only one she has told about wanting to strip, no one will ever know. Her goal is just to make a lot of $ in a short amount of time - is this possible without her having to go home with strangers? Will just dancing get her there? She's my cousin but she is hot.

First of all, her family WILL know. They always find out, one way or another, even though they may not confront her about it. When strippers say their parents don't know, that usually means they pretend not to know and the girl plays along with the charade.

Second, going home with strangers isn't the only threat to her safety. It's the psychological damage of fake intimacy and the temptations of easy money. It can stunt her ability to experience true intimacy and mess up her romantic life and her self esteem. Even if she keeps it all inside the club, and the dances are strictly non-contact, it can take a heavy toll. Especially if she enters into it with an unrealistic view of how simple and easy it all is, which appears to be the case here. It may still be what she wants to do, but she should be more aware of the costs beforehand.

As usual I'll have to counter the majority here by saying..."it really depends on her". If she's mentally stable and strong emotionally, then perhaps she has what it takes. Shadowcat is right, "its about sex"...though many unsuccessful dancers will say its about fantasy. To be successful in this industry she'll have to know how to push a man's buttons. And to do that "fast" takes a lot of seductive power...and the ability to live two separate lives. Granted...if she has that ability now...and is currently working on a Grad Degree...then I'd say she probably already has other avenues to investigate first.

My friend's girlfriend worked for a time as an upscale stripper. Her worst night was $40 and a very good night was around $1,500. I believe her best night ever was $4,000 something. Did it include prostition inside the club? Maybe, she sure didn't have any problem with prostitution and felt fortnate men were willing to pay a lot for nothing--she preferred outcall to stripping because she said it was less work.

As far as emotional damage and costs it really depends on the woman. This one size fits all mentality is great to keep things simple, but it also keeps it simple minded. An example of simple mindedness is the statement alcohol is addictive. Now, depending on your experience or that of your family you might think that statement is 100% true or near 100% bogus. Alcohol is addictive to *some* people. Cocaine is addictive to *some* people. Originally, I believe, the "experts" thought cocaine wasn't addictive the realization that it is addictive took years and then it is the all or none bs yet again.

Like I said, stripper damage is a threat to her safety, not certain doom for any and all. I believe that the ones who are most susceptible to it are those who naively underestimate it and think stripping is going to be a waltz in the park with easy money and no consequences.

I think maybe doing time in Prison is a good compare/contrast to working in a Strip Club; I don’t really mean that as a negative. The facts are people have a lot of preconceived notions of both societies.

Unless you have personally experienced either, in some way, you will ALWAYS be surprised by how different the experience can be and the effects it can have. You might think you can be prepared or have a plan on how to handle it, but the shits gonna change you, your plans and your outlooks. Good, Bad, or Indifferent you change.

I think what you want to hear is “You cousin will be fine, safe, and unaffected by the experience.” Reality is your sister will be changed, by the experience and I think, more likely than not the risk presented for negative effects is to great advise that she try it out.

There is a reason these girls make the money they do, they accept a certain amount of risk. One girl I have had the pleasure to spend time with, explained that she wouldn’t do this job if it weren’t for the money first off, and second for the occasional decent- nice- real person she meets (was it game? Could have been- but she wasn’t making money when she told me she was tired of dancing and preferred to just sit and chat with me). Lets face it, men are pigs, there are guys that go to strip clubs just to test the boundaries of socially acceptable behavior. Example, how would your cousin deal with the drunk frat boy sticking his finger up her ass while she was air dancing in front of him? It may not happen all the time, but you know this shit happens.

Good Luck to your cousin- sounds like she will make the right decision for herself.

I also agree with much of what was said previously.

(interesting topic for my first post-- haha)

If you care about her you'll tell her to find another way. I know dancers that I really care about who tell me some of the crummy things they have to put up with. It makes me sick and we're only "friends". There's no way I could let a relative get into this.

Depends on her.

Cons: She could end up prostituting once she sees how easy it is to make money with her looks and body. Also, her dancer friends could get her hooked on drugs.

Pros: If she dances at an upscale club, she is relatively safe and can make some good dough, in a short period of time.

Whatever her choice.... I wish her well.

One other point is that being pretty and smart doesn't necessarily guarantee that big bucks await her if all she does is submit to taking off her clothes. It doesn't hurt to be pretty, but its not nearly as important as being a good actress who can make unattractive guys believe she enjoys being sexual and intimate with them. It also helps if she's tenacious about using her talents to get their money no matter what, and a bit callous about taking it from them. Put all those qualities together with a pretty face and a killer bod, and indeed you have a license to print money.

Wedgeworth: Dancing is not for every woman. The only way she will ever really know if it is for her is to give it a try. Will she be safe? Depends on the club. Will she have to do anything besides "dance"? Depends on the club, the other dancers and how badly she wants to earn. Many thousands of women have had very profitable dancing careers and managed to get out of it none the worse for ware with a few lessons about themselves and men learned along the way. How will she do? There is only one way for her to find out. Honestly, a chat board about strip clubs touting the customer's POV is probably the last place you or your cousin should be looking for advice about this.

Yeah, how come she's not directing these questions to her school's student jobs counselor?

Actually, considering the wide-eyed innocence of his original question, I think Wedgeworth is a lot better prepared to help his cousin assess the choice realistically than before he came here. Many women, once they take a hard look at it, know that dancing isn't for them without having to try it.

Wedgeworth,
All of the guys here have made some valid points, but I will give you some perspective as a woman and entertainer. It depends on the type of woman she is. If she is strong willed, motivated, and knows how to handle her business than there should be no problems. My advice, for her or any woman thinking of entering this business, is be true to yourself. I've met a lot of nice people and I enjoy my job. I have worked in the same club now for over 2 years, although I started dancing 4 yrs ago(with a break here and there). I have never tried drugs, never gotten caught up in the "drama" that comes along with the job nor have I had to have OTC sexual expeciences to make extra $$$. Yeah the $$ comes fast, so be smart with it. Take out what $$ you need to pay your bills and expenses then put what's left in the bank and reinvest it (CD's, IRA's, stocks or whatever). You will be surprised how fast it adds up. There will be some ups and downs though. Envy from other dancers: fuck it. Just do you and remember you are there for you and to better yourself so to hell with what others think. Its ok to have a few chatter buddies that work with you so leave it @ that; chat about random things but nothing too personal. Leave your personal affairs @ home and never get involved in anyone else's crap or the club gossip to avoid drama because it will make you lose sight of your purpose. Afterall, this is a job whether its a club or not. Some nights will be pretty crappy, but hell compared to working 40+ hr wks, its not all that bad. My motto is 'Yeah to some it's bad that I may work in a strip club, so the least I can do is do my job with integrity." Not saying that I have all of the answers, but I have followed and still do follow these guidlines when I work and I haven't had any problems with being strictly an entertainer or making (and saving) tons of $$$. STAY FOCUSED!!

Having (roughly) taken the same path -- paid for graduate school partly by working in seedier "stripping" establishments (though my experiences were mostly at gay-male oriented clubs) -- I'd say, it's the PEOPLE you associate with who are the trouble. Is she the sort of girl who has worked an odd summer as a carny or similar, and can "handle" herself around managers and bosses who want to cop a feel, can keep them from stealing her take, knows how to resist a nice snort of coke just when she might need the pick-me-up, keeps pretty much to herself and doesn't rely on peer-pressure and social groups to define her self-worth? Then she can handle stripping. If not, then ... it's a risk.

Interesting thread. An outsider could easily point out that the regular CUSTOMERS of stripping are being mildly hypocritical by suggesting that a girl shouldn't go into being the PERFORMER of stripping. Oh yeah we're all so positive about what it feels like to be the guy on the lap-dance couch, but when it comes right down to it we wouldn't suggest that someone whom we know would encourage his daughter / sister / cousin into stripping, not even just for the money. Hmm ...

If I knew every guy that a dancer met would treat her as well as I treat dancers, then I might have a different opinion. I know of too many assholes though.

Book Guy, I know you're being somewhat ironic, but I'm honestly not saying she shouldn't strip, just that she should take a harder look at the dangers before jumping into it. Still, I would never deny a world of hypocrisy associated with my strip club habit. I wouldn't want one in my neighborhood, wouldn't want stripping to become socially acceptable, extras to become legal, strippers to become employees with benefits, and so on. IMO, if you aren't conflicted about it, you're not getting enough raunchy kicks out of it.

Indeed (again) Chandler. The best red beans and rice in New Orleans was at Buster Holmes, and you could count on it being good because he never paid his Sanitation Administration fees and always had as many roaches as red beans in his kitchen.

Thank you guys for the best opinions & advice on the subject. My cousin read your comments & thinks all of you have it together. She would not mind a go at it if the crowd were composed of "guys like you." She's a smart, independent girl & I trust her to make the right decision for herself.

>My cousin read your comments & thinks all of you have it together.<

Now I'm REALLY worried about her.

Actually, it's true, that if most of a strip club's patrons were of the sort who are "competent" at attending clubs (as would more ((rather than less)) likely be the case among readers of TUSCL, and even more so among participants at TUSCL's boards), then stripping wouldn't be such a risk for a young girl like her. She's probably right, if only the customers were more like this web board! But they aren't. In fact, the management and the typical customer are generally a LOT less well informed, or respectful, than the members of this board. We do this as a well-considered "hobby"; most of them just drop in without much thought to, how to be decent blokes in that novel setting.

I believe many of the posters here are like regulars in a club. They know the rules and what to expect in a club. The regulars don't usually cause trouble. Many customers in a strip club are not regulars though. Some may not even know the rules and some may be drunk frat boys thinking this is a great chance to party. They may get noisy or obnoxious without even realizing it. Some guys or girls may try to push the boundaries with touching or whatever they can get away with. Then it may be up to the dancer and or club management to deal with the situation if needed. I've been to an air club with some very nice pretty dancers. I enjoyed visiting it on occasion. Some guys will try to tempt the girls to see them later and some may offer money. I think the dancer needs her head on straight or she may eventually agree and then her life will be heading down possibly the wrong path. The other thing to consider is that a few guys don't want to date a stripper or girls who have been one. Maybe it wasn't date but marry. I heard or read this somewhere but I can't remember where now. I think it's possible that a guy wouldn't want a girl who seemed to have a seedy past (not knowing that it wasn't seedy). It's all a matter of opinion.

In some clubs I heard other dancers are rude and steal from the other dancers. Of course a new dancer might not know this about a club. I doubt very many male customers would even suspect it. I heard about one club where a pretty dancer made more money than the other dancers and she found her locker stuffed full of fish. I heard about stories where dancers get their stuff stolen all the time. I tend to believe those stories may be true. I've heard more stories but I won't ramble on.

I once ran into a girl where I worked at who asked me if I thought she could make it as a stripper. I really didn't know her that well and some of the guys and girls must have talked about me visiting a strip club. I guess they didn't have much to talk about in that small town. I didn't really like being put on the spot but generally I don't recommend something that may end up becoming a moral decision in some people's minds. I still believe at least here in the south that stripping is not the most morally acceptable position. I personally don't see anything wrong with it. However many people do and they don't mind causing trouble on occasion. Some other people are just troublemakers to start with. Dealing with all these people and society in general putting down the stripping profession, I wouldn't recommend it to friends. You also have to put up with the so called analysts who may say almost all strippers suffer from problems like a lack of self esteem or else they say they were abused as a child or something else.

I did meet one girl who claimed she had a college degree and was stripping as a moonlighting job to make extra income. She seemed brighter than a normal stripper and I don't recall too many dancers telling me they have a college degree but chose to work that profession instead of their degree. I can't remember which it was now since it was a while ago. I've met hundreds of dancers and I only recall one that told me she had a college degree. Of course I don't usually go to air dance clubs. sorry if I rambled on too long here.

On the bright side in some clubs, I don't know of too many professions where you can drink on the job, socialize, and not do too much hard work except for occasionally dancing on the stage or performing lap dances.

I heard some guys say all it takes to make a ton of money is a nice pair of tits and ass. I think they were jealous.

Casualguy: the reason a chick asked you if you thought she could be a stripper probably wasn't about the moral questions. I'm guessing that it was more an opening (an inept one, at that) for flirtation along the lines of, "So, am I *ATTRACTIVE* enough (implied: to you) to be a stripper, do you think?" Problem with a woman asking that sort of question is, that it's a no-win for the guy, like, "Does this dress make me look fat?" There is no answer except, "You are perfect just like you are," thus eliminating the entire point of the question.

My guess is she was titillated by your willingness to stand mildly outside social norms by admitting at work to having attended strip clubs, and she was trying to further push the boundaries with you. "Sooo ... should I get a breast augmentation, do you think? Sooo ... how many girls here shave their pussies, do you think? Sooo ... could I be a stripper, do you think?" Get it?

I think the last place I worked at and the small town I lived in had over half the residents thinking about sex a lot of the time there. I had a different girl tell me she wanted to do a one night stand with me. She asked me in front of her coworkers. Talk about being open about everything. Maybe she was a bit more bold because some time earlier she had been a bit sneaky and pinched me on my rear when I wasn't expecting it. I immediately sought to get her back by pinching her back. She ran away too quickly. Then after I forgot about that she asks to do a one night stand. This was several years ago before all that sexual harassment discussions became part of training for employees. I remember when I was a college student working summer jobs I really heard a number of sexual comments. Most of it I considered kidding around as I still do if a female says something like that to me.

One example of kidding around is a female worker asks you "let me see your hands." You stick out your hand. She smiles and says "you have long fingers." She says to another female coworker "hmmm, long fingers, long feet, I'm getting a picture here."

One example of a male asking a female worker something that wasn't acceptable to the female several years ago would be asking her something about her crack. (between her legs). I can't remember what the one guy asked but I heard he got slapped. Nowadays, things like this might be grounds for sexual harassment if one party pressed the issue.

Bookguy, I think the norm among the workers at that place I worked at was a bit outside what many consider the norm. I believe the whole county had the highest teenage pregnancy rate in the whole state. I guess there wasn't much to do in that small town. By the way I only told a couple of people at work at that time that I went to any strip club. One guy in particular talked about sexual things and made sexual comments I didn't really care to hear too much about. I tried to shut him up one day by showing him some pics I had with some naked feature dancers sitting on my lap. He did quiet up with the comments he made to me. Apparently he told everyone else some story. Some guys like to talk.