Sex is Sex but Money is Money
jackslash
Detroit strip clubs
This is a well-written article by an escort. What I liked best was her analysis of her customers. The writer is intelligent but also something of a cold bitch.
https://medium.com/matter/sex-is-sex-but…
https://medium.com/matter/sex-is-sex-but…
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1. She's not in love with you, she just wants your money, all of it (RIL definition).
2. Don't fall in love with a stripper (or escort).
3. She tolerates you, might like you a little bit depending on personality or looks or both, but when she departs (with your wad of cash), she's not spending time thinking about you the way you might be doing with her.
2. Don't fall in love with a stripper (or escort).” —>
^^ 1.This is why I think men the day after their 18th birthday, or hell, boys on their 17th birthday should be thrown into strip clubs as a group with their friends. not with Dad. He’s a crutch. No. Let the kid use his instincts. Baptism by fire.
2. So when you’re that young, and when the 24 yo stripper hottie comes on to you, it won’t make sense! I mean, what would a 24 yo independent woman possibly want with a 18 yo kid, still in High School, and living with mom and dad??!? You’ll start to notice the subtle non-verbal cues in her body language that will betray her words.
3. And the cognitive dissonance will snap you out of it. After that point, the PL will be immune.
4. 30s, 40s and 50s (and fishstix) judging by the RILs on this forum, is too late to learn this stuff. Except for Daddilac. He rocks.
1. It's interesting in the first part of that the "get to know you part" is the tough part and the sex is the easy part. But she also mentions that she knows why there's the little profile of the playmates and that guys like to have a connection.
I like a connection. I like to know the woman. Even when I go to an extras club, I like it better if I can take 5-10 minutes to talk to the woman before we go upstairs. And with CF/ATF types, I want to sit and talk with them. I want to get to know them. I want to know how I can make things good for them the way they can make things good for me. However, that's also where I notice that's where a lot of them start to feel uncomfortable. I don't think a lot of women who are used to that.
Also, I don't mind if she asks about me and what I have going on. But I'll ask more about her and her life, probably. I know me. I live with me every day. I spend enough time in my own head. If I'm out, I want to find out about someone else. Maybe I'm weird like that.
2. All that prep — makeup, lingerie, etc.
This is one of the reasons I like seeing dancers walking out at the end of a shift in a shirt & blue jeans. If she looks good like that, we can have a lot of fun without her having to do all that work, and that's hot.
3. "They all want you to come."
Men are stupid. It's nice if she does, but you never ask. In fact, you don't bring it up. If you're doing it right, you should be making it enjoyable for her, whether or not she gets there. It's not a win/loss proposition, and putting pressure on her to get there isn't going to help her get there. Just make it as good as you can for her. If you really want to get her there, bring a Hitachi Magic Wand.
4. Ninety percent of clients were married and most were bankers.
I am not a banker, nor would I want to be. I do not sell anything and I am not an executive. But then again, I also am not paying $800-$900 for escorts either. If you know what you're doing, you should be able to get quality without having to pay that much.
5. The four categories of client:
I probably am the guy trying to buy a relationship. I probably think I'm sweet, but am much more demanding, as she put it. Back to the thing from the start of the article. I'm the opposite of the guy that thinks he owns the escort, though. I want her to be her. I want to pay her, but I also want her, even if it's only ever so slightly, to actually want to fuck me, too, if only somewhat moreso than her other clients. I want more than the money to be why she's there.
6. Not sure if she always had it in her, or if she became it because of escorting, but yeah, sounds like she became all about the money in the end.
That last part is what strikes me. That seems unfortunate. I get that they're in it for the money first and foremost, but I try to be polite, smell nice, look good, too, so that we both enjoy it. I don't think those kinds of things even do anything for her anymore. The money is the only enjoyment. That sucks. If there's one thing I wish the article got into more, that would be it.
For me, sex is worth more than the money. That's why I end up clubbing. But for her, sex is sex, but money is money. That seems backward.
I hope sex never just becomes sex for me. There's still a thrill with every new girl and still a few bucket list things left for me.
But I did scroll through it after I read the first third of it. Interesting ideas and observations from a young person (at 24) who feels old and wise after showing up in NYC at 19 and falling into whoring. I'm not dismissing it, but I'd be interested in reading something from 48 year old "Svetlana Z" after life and therapy have more time with her.
"Mostly, I offered understanding."
That part she gets. She could still clean up as a stripper if she went back into sex work...or in all kinds of jobs that don't involve directly getting guys off. She's already seen countless men at their most vulnerable. If nothing else, while still attractive she can use what she's learned quickly the hard way.
"Clients fall into four categories. There are the guys who want to pay for your companionship. There are the guys who think they’re buying a relationship. There are the ones who think they own you. And then there are the couples."
This is obviously wrong. Not because her categories are wrong, but because there's more to it. The obvious one she missed is the category of customer who cares just as little about her as she cares about them. Those guys have long since replaced her with another dish. That's what keeps the hobby interesting.