Sexual abuse?

theDirkDiggler
Illinois
poledancer83's recent discussion had me wondering or re-wondering (as i prefer to forget this type of thing) what percentage of strippers had a history of sexual abuse. Most of the abuse often happened during their childhood, but sometimes it started or continued into adulthood or near adulthood with their choice of boyfriends and often the resulting dysfunction, although i don't consider early pregnancy necessarily dysfunction but just an unfortunate life long consequence of behavioral decisions. Not the child, itself, mind you, but the resulting difficulties when the mother, a child herself, is nowhere near ready and the child has to grow up in a far from ideal situation.

I remember earlier in the days, it was some huge number like 60-90% of sex workers although i'm not sure how it broke down by industry; i think it was higher for prostitutes and porn stars over strippers, some. or a few, who did it primarily to to pay their way through school. It might be a bit or quite a bit less now, but not that much less because just in the general population, the number is already too high (something like 20-30% of girls and even higher, much higher if you include simple indecent exposure or access to porn as well as sexting in grade school and middle school).

This is definitely one of the darker discussions, like the one about drug use, and probably the girls at SW have a better idea, but they seem to live in a different world (although you argue the same for TUSCL), so really this is probably an unanswerable question. I have never asked a stripper about this type of thing but i remember over ten years ago just one girl randomly telling me that 98%(!) of strippers were molested while i was getting a dance (talk about a buzz kill); that club had way less than 50 girls working that day and i don't think that girl was saying she was the only one of them that didn't go through it. Nowadays, i prefer to be blissfully ignorant, but just speculating, i'm sure it is still an ongoing issue for many of these girls.

22 comments

Latest

Cashman1234
7 years ago
Good question @dirkdiggler. I’m not sure if we will get enough information here to know what the actual percentage might be.

Stripping has become a bit more mainstream than in the past, but there’s still a stigma associated with dancing. In the past it was much less acceptable to have been either a service provider or customer in a strip club.

Therefore maybe it’s not on the high end of your estimated range? My logic is pure conjecture and inference. In my view - I’d find the percentage of civilian society that has experienced abuse and add 25% to that - to come up with an estimate of strippers who may have been sexually abused.
Salty.Nutz
7 years ago
Part of becoming an adult is not to blame your childhood or parents for your life now. Sure you have a legit excuse that your childhood/parents sucked and you ended up being a stripper, but there's plenty of strippers with good upbringing that still end up hoeing.
Cashman1234
7 years ago
Salty - I understand your point. But I think this is to better understand the percentage of strippers who have suffered from sexual abuse. I didn’t read blame as an overriding factor in the OP’s post. Maybe I missed his point.
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ No, you didn't misread anything. I'm not into the blame game and staying in there only perpetuates the ability to move on. Indeed, i was mostly interested in the likely percentage, although, yes it is unlikely to be definitively known. Still most psychologists/psychiatrists will inquire about a person's past or upbringing (as this tends have formative influences in a person's personality) to better understand a person's present behavior.
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
^ not move on...
Cashman1234
7 years ago
I think a persons formative years play a large part in who that person becomes as an adult. It should also influence their choice of job. I’m not sure how much a role it plays - but it must be an influence.

My parents were frightened of money - they’d never discuss it. They took it to an extreme - and I think it was partly due to their lack of income. I rebelled - and started reading the stock pages as a teen (that really got the girls!) But I learned - and invested throughout college. I’m lucky to have had that upbringing - as it helped significantly. Others rebel and want to get out of the house with less positive prospects.
Uprightcitizen
7 years ago
Of the stripper or SA girls I have been on a personal level with who are regulars and wanting to share this kind of information the precentage is very high (more than 50%). But the sample size is really not large enough to be statistically significant (Its not like that is something I ask about, way too personal). Its just something that comes up. Unfortunately I suspect it is common.
vincemichaels
7 years ago
As always the faker here has his head up his ass. Wrong again, dickbreath.
tumblingdice
7 years ago
I've sexually abused several women,but it was all consensual.
Salty.Nutz
7 years ago
The correlation between sex abuse and becoming a stripper (sex work) doesn't matter because there are enough strippers that dance that haven't been abused. All sex abused girls aren't strippers, and all strippers aren't sex abused. The stat would be bullshit if you found the answer. For example sexual victim advocate groups have been victims of sexual assaults. That would be false because you don't have to be a victim of sexual abuse to join the fight against sexual assault. These strippers aren't as damaged or have daddy issues as much as PL would like to believe.
NinaBambina
7 years ago
Never experienced any severe sexual abuse until I started dancing. I've been sexually assaulted countless times by customers, but never actually raped or anything.
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
Many of the smarter and more politically aware dancers in strip clubs are very open about familial sexual child abuse, and how common it is, and how our society is committed to denying it.

I don't think this is more common in strip clubs, just more openness.

SJG
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
Strippers are less committed to lies and denial
Salty.Nutz
7 years ago
They are too open about, but at the same time won't tell you their real name. In my book that's a red flag
tumblingdice
7 years ago
Strippers are less committed to lies and denial.SJG,please stop smoking the gravy.
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
I look at it like this. Psyches are like bridges. Some are sturdy and can take a lot of wear and tear and abuse and be none worse for wear while others are a lot more fragile and shaky and it doesn't take much to rock or break it. So some girls will respond and act out differently. Doesn't make it right or wrong. It just is what it is.
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@NinaBambina
Severe sexual abuse and assault in the club sounds very traumatic. If that's how you felt about what happened and it continues to happen (as it has occured "countless" time, so i assume it keeps happening) if i were you i would consider why i continue working in this business as it's not likely to change. Just a suggestion as i'm not one to tell anyone what to do.

It's strange but so much of what happens even in the front room for free and not just in a private dance or VIP, mind you, could be construed as sexual harassment, abuse or assault to one person and just another day on the job to another, just because of consent or comfort levels and how differently they react to it.
gawker
7 years ago
I recently learned that a relative had indecently touched one of my daughters when she was 8 years old. I asked her about it and she started crying, saying how hard holidays have been for the past 30 years facing him.
But she then went on to talk about her strength, her ability to deal with adversity, and how sorry she is for his fucked upmind. She's an executive at a Fortune 500 company.
My point is that we all have shit in our lives. How we deal with it determines our outcome. I don't offer that as an excuse for pederasty, but that while there may be a correlation it isn't necessarily causative.
NinaBambina
7 years ago
"If i were you i would consider why i continue working in this business as it's not likely to change."

No offense, but you're not me, and I'm fine with my choices. I chose this job to better my life via financial success. I don't go home in tears, I go home with a wad of money that I shook my ass and sweet-talked to earn. I'm sure plenty of guys here have certain aspects of their job they dislike; however, unless you're a trust fund kid you actually have to work to make a living. That is what I do.
Cashman1234
7 years ago
Well said gawker. There’s wisdom in your words. People can respond differently to similar circumstances - as each of us is an individual.
theDirkDiggler
7 years ago
@NinaBambina
None taken, i have nothing more to say about your situation.

I have noticed that girls can often go in two directions after having been abused. Well, i don't know that they were abused, but i have seen these two types. They can shut down and just have a very difficult time growing sexually (anything sexual in nature can be quite traumatic for them) or they can go the other extreme and become almost addicted and act out promiscuously (the so called freaks). Of course there are other types, some that seem more healthier like girls that have solid and defined boundaries, but don't seem to freak out when they are pushed but are very clear that it's not going further. And some that just seem very sexual but still very much in control of their sexuality and just seem very comfortable in their skin. Again, i have no idea if these latter types were abused, the first one doesn't seem to have been and the other one could have been but probably just dealt with it better or in a more sane or mentally strong manner (the sturdy bridge if you will).
san_jose_guy
7 years ago
Strippers are already living beyond the pale. So they don't have to defend the Good Family. Quite the contrary, some are very frank about exposing the lies.

They have written about this in the old Spectator Magazine, that the sexual abuse survivor rate is not really higher, there is just more openness.

SJG

Craze 4 Toys, Adult Super Store, 25 E Santa Clara St, San Jose, CA
has lots and lots of stripper shoes out on display, always full height, always with the straps to hold them on. Lots of styles, sorted on on the display shelves by size, Pleaser and Ellie.

https://www.google.com/maps/@37.3363702,…
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