tuscl

How many time have you been disappointed by inaccurate reviews

I travel around and club tour when I am in an area I have not visited before. Several times I have be disappointed by an area that I thought would have great clubs based on rave reviews. Were have you all been that you thought would have great clubbing that disappointed you and where have you been that lived up to expectations.
Disappointed:
COI: From the reviews and raves I expected gorgeous women beautiful clubs. Reality = decent women(no better than clubs of equal quality any where else in the country), lots of plastic surgery, same club interiors, very high prices, plus a fuck you I'm from Cali attitude in the higher end clubs I could do without in. I found some found and better attitude at the less fancy places.
Vegas: Not as show stopping as the hype, women still no better than places elsewhere, though the clubs were nicer inside and out the price offset the look. Ok to visit but no value. although you have to expect hype in Vegas and the stage shows are the best I have seen. (bottom line is Vegas is just an overload of everything)(maybe it is because I do not gamble at all)
Portland OR: All the hype about these are party clubs was just that all hype, lots of clubs but none lived up to reviews.
Chicago: nuff said
New Jersey: I went clubbing in NJ years ago and had a good time despite most clubs are Bikini clubs. Now most have been invaded by eastern european girls who demand tips for just waking up to you. Very annoying. better off with an AMP
New York City: The clubs are becoming populated by eastern European girls who are all about the money and will promise anything, most clubs are small and dumpy, while the big clubs are expensive in the extreme(Penthouse and Hustler), The women are only slightly better than average at the expensive places and only some of the girls want to entertain you and not look at you like an ATM, as expensive as these clubs are you would expect better than "wanna dance" and when you politely decline they glare at you and walk away.

Pleasantly surprised by reviewed accuracy:
Detroit: all that is purported to be, wide variety of club form dives with less than attractive girls to glitzy clubs with 10's, some clubs are just show clubs and other are more. prices are not out of reach and the clubs management are generally customer friendly
Providence: While Providence has recovered some of its appeal after (several years ago) a dumb ass manager at Cheater hired a 14 year old prostitute and got caught the over all clubbing scene is pretty good again. The various clubs wax and wane on quality but the reviews are generally accurate and will direct you where to go.
Dallas / Ft Worth: Lots of clubs to have fun and some that offer more, You can go to a topless club until after midnight then go to a nude club that has not booze and eat breakfast with naked girls, let the dining begin!
San Francisco: the club are all what they where said to be, very expensive but Everything! is available for a price and the women are as good looking as any club elsewhere, if you got the money ...
Reno: Way more laid back than Vegas and way less money, clubs are also laid back and more fun, some girls do, some don't like everywhere and the full service establishments are only 15-20 minutes outside of town if you are so inclined.
There are many smaller establishments around that provide an outstanding experience, some high end some not so much but I wish reviewers would take the time to review properly. I try to only count reviews that are from guys that have reviewed in more than one area and the more geographic locations the better. An example is Dayton OH where the clubs are uniformly bad but some get glowing reviews from the locals because those clubs are the best of the shit-holes available.

9 comments

  • rickthecoconutcrab
    7 years ago
    Which clubs would be the best locations for a sexy suit-wearing crustacean to get some hairless ape poontang?

    Just remember, I'm into the vagina. None of these girls will get a claw in the anus. I'm no weirdo.

    Scuttle! Scuttle! Scuttle!
  • rl27
    7 years ago
    A few times.

    Christies Cabaret in Cleveland in the early 90's. It was well hyped on several sites, including TUSCL. All the talk about a good time with a reasonable price. Dancer looks was mostly accurate, there were dozens of hot dancers, almost all 8's a few 9's. Most of hot dancers, including a hot blonde who was well advertised, said they only will do the half hour VIP's which I believe were $400, back when VIP's were $100 to $150. Did try a few regular dances, all air with the dancers trying to upsell for the ridiculous VIP.

    Only thing that saved the night was I overheard a conversation in the parking lot of how much better Model Tease the night before. So I headed on over to Model Tease and had a very good time, except the fact my car's battery decided to die as I left.

    As Tired Traveler mentioned, Vegas reviews are all over the map. I was disappointed at most clubs, all rip offs. The only good time I had was at the time Deja Vu's during the day shift, a club with lots of negative reviews, which I suspect were mostly from their competitors. Although that's not saying much, it was good for Vegas, but average at best even for Ohio.
  • Dougster
    7 years ago
    Mons Venus in Tampa was very disappointing.Definitely the most over hyped of the clubs I've been too.
  • flagooner
    7 years ago
    @ Dougster - agreed

  • san_jose_guy
    7 years ago
    I wouldn't put that much stock in reviews. Mostly they just tell me that the place exists.

    There used to be this printed guide book. The most important thing they would say about the clubs would be the number of girls per shift. Usually exaggerated.

    But at the doors of clubs I have always asked, "how many girls do you have right now." That is the best predictor of their looks, as the more girls the more competitive.

    Only when written by regular forum members whom I have interacted with, would I put much stock in a review, as then I know how to calibrate it.

    SJG
  • twentyfive
    7 years ago
    I am not usually disappointed by the reviews because I know most of the local reviewers; and those are the reviews I count on not the reviewers who parachute in, just write a review based on their experience elsewhere. My opinion is unless you are familiar with the particular club you are reviewing you are not likely to have much insight as to how the club is on a day to day basis. The out of town reviews do have some value, but to really get the most out of a particular club, you really do need some local knowledge.
  • Papi_Chulo
    7 years ago
    I'm not a traveler business or o/w thus I don't have to rely on reviews to find a good club.

    I have taken some SC trips but these have been pre-planned months in advance and I had a decent idea of what the club was about from having read reviews over months and sometimes a couple of years (since I peruse the daily reviews).

    Thus I'm usually not in the situation of having to go to an area/city for non-SC reasons then having to find a descent club - I usually pick the city I go to b/c of a particular club(s) vs going to a city for some other reason then having to find a club in short-order.

    My out-of-area clubs I've visited were already known clubs or clubs that fit my particular niche thus I can't say I visited a club than severely underwhelmed in relation to its reviews - but again I usually visit out-of-area clubs on purpose vs having to be in a particular city for other reasons and then having to find something.
  • JimGassagain
    7 years ago
    I've been disappointed at a couple, but the latest I was at never charged a cover during the day. The girls were a miss at the Body Ckub in Miami, yet it was a Tuesday and if course I wasn't a regular. No fault there but the bartender had an angry look about her and she demanded I pay twice for my second beer even though I said I already paid for it. It was so loud she either ignored me or was too angry to listen. I just didn't tip her to make up for her mistake. Reviews by Papi Chulo said I would get bare back sex in the booths.
  • shadowcat
    7 years ago
    Not the reviews but rather the club information. Nothing worse than being on a road trip and planning to stop at a specific club for lunch, go out of your way, only to find out the club hours have changed. Why is it that people will submit tons of review but never update club details?
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