FODL's thread about respect made me wonder what the most disrespectful thing a dancer or customer has done to you ? Personaly I have never had a dancer treat me without respect however I regularly encounter fellow customers who leech off my stage tips and/or try to watch my dances for free.
Why would the bouncer do anything? He knows that she usually lets guys lick her pussy and you have to expect that everyonce in a while it will get bitten. Just part of the game.
OMG I have seen so many poor girls get bitten in the poon area. One time this gril was on stage and was sitting on the side with her legs dangling over, when the guy sitting in front of her went at her and bit her. She started crying she said it hurt so bad. The worst part was when she told the bouncer he didn't do anything. She told all the girls what he had done, and no-one went up to him the rest of the night. So he just left. Thw worst part is, that what if he had something and she were to bleed? What if she would have caught something? That would scare the hell out of me.
No argument here, I agree that dancers sometimes have to put up with a lot more crap than guys usually do. Although I must admit I've never seen anyone bite a dancer in the crotch, guess I don't hang out in the right places. BTW, my dictionary defines disrespect as "lack of respect, rudeness" and further defines respect as "politeness, consideration." Those are pretty broad definitions and I think I may have encountered a lack of politeness once or twice in my club travels.
As far as high contact is concerned, I personally like a lot of contact and won't usually buy a lap dance unless some two-way touching is allowed. I've yet to meet the dancer who is so good that it's worth $400 per hour ($20 for 3 minutes) just to watch her dance. I usually ask a girl what her rules are in advance and try to respect them as much as possible. I can only remember one time that a girl told me in adnvace that she didn't like to be touched. I am especially offended when a girl gives every indication that lots of touching is OK until she has the $$$ in hand, then changes the rules. Obtaining money under false pretenses isn't any different than stealing in my book. I have never asked for extras although some have been offered to me on several occasions.
Lack of coutesy yes, I agree. I can't say I have ever had a dancer promise things and not deliver though. I personally have never have encountered what people describe as a ROB, in over a decade of visiting clubs. Maybe it is because I don't seek contact in contact clubs ( not to say you do, but we both know lots of customers do)and I don't seek extras in contact clubs. Basicaly I don't expect illegal contact from dancers. Anyway I still stand by my statements that the dancers deal with much more extreem levels of disrespect than we customers. So many of them have to deal with sexual assualts and its just f'cked to put that on the same level with being verbaly mislead. Customers main complaints tend to be of the regection ( dates/phone #/ contact etc) varity. Where as the dancers complaints are often of forced sexual contact and non payment of services rendered. Just look at Dusty's list and then compare it to yours and I'm think you'll see my point.
JimJazz, I agree with you, I said they were annoying. But I do think any gross lack of courtesy shown to a customer without him doing something wrong borders on disrespect, depending on how blatant it is. Especially when a girl tries to rip off a customer. How many times have you encountered a girl who says she'll give you the best lap dance of your life, then when you get into the room she tells you you aren't allowed to touch. To me that's a rip-off and that girl no longer warrants nor gets any respect from me. Telling lies to get money is hardly showing respect for the customer.
One time a dancer took my drink and poured it on me when I told her I wasn't going to buy her a drink. I had just sat down, and I wasn't ready for any dances I just wanted to get settled it. I didn't even invite her to sit down. But besides that I have not had any other disrespect from a dancer.
DUSTY: How about adding people who have never met you, know nothing about you, and post on internet discussion boards that you and other dancers are "prostitutes." ;)
The most disrespecfull things I have encountered are:
1. On a stage show once, a guy bit me on the crotch so hard I bled, he litterally dove in when opened my legs... I had him tossed out
2. Another time on stage...A guy grabbed my boob so hard and squeezed it I had a hand mark on my bood for a day an a half... he was also thrown out.
3. I a private dance, a guy tried to stick his finger up my bum as I was turned around... at a no touch club.. he was thrown out
4. I have been bit.. licked.. grabbed.. smacked.. and had my hair pulled... yet I am still not bitter :)
5.I have given numerous private dances, that the guy all of a sudden didn't have enough to pay me afterwards
I have had guys get pissed off when they offer me a drink and tell them I do not drink and they tell me to leave.... The list could go on forever... but these were the first to come to mind
K, I think you hit the nail on the head, "No one is going respect somone who doesn't respect themselves." Amen. And that's a big part of the problem, because a lot of guys are never going to respect a girl who strips for money, because in their opinion (not mine) strippers aren't showing any respect for themselves.
A few of my annoying experiences: the worst, which happens a lot, is when a girl either verbally or by her actions promises lots of contact, then objects to touching during the dance. Next would be when a girl is looking everywhere but at the customer during a private dance. When a girl acts anoyed when you say no to wannadance? When a girl sits down with you without asking and says buymeadrink? When you ask a girl to join you and she says she'll be right there then never shows up. But the worst that ever happened to me - I was sitting and talking with a girl who I had been with several times before and had always bought multiple private dances when one of her best customers came in, she excused herself to say hello to him (which is fine with me) and said she'd be right back, but an hour later she was still sitting with him (I left.) This was a girl who frequently complained to me about guys not respecting her.
Sorry Fondl- not to be disagreeable but I don't see how any of that is disrespectful. Annoying yes, but not on the par with what dancers deal with in the least.
OH....1 MORE!!! The guys that stick the dollar bill in their mouth and lay their head on the stage....WHAT THE HECK AM I EXPECTED TO DO WITH THAT?? This guy got pissed b/c I just grabbed the one out of his mouth and said thanks....he was like, "Is that ALL I get???" I mean, c'mon --- I'm not gonna sit on your face for a fucking dollar!!!
Dancers --- ESPECIALLY THESE DAYS --- need to please have more respect for YOURSELVES. Unless a dancer respects herself enough to not put up with the nonsense, those kind of men will continue to be disrespect them. Noone respects someone that doesn't respect themself.
When I was cocktail waitressing at my first SC (yeah, I was one of those...), I would get so pissed b/c the customers were so damn cheap to the wait staff there. I had a guy give me a quarter tip once and I was so offended I threw it back in his face.
I had one redneck hick asshole ask me once while I was on a satellite stage, "I heard that Oriental women have pussy's that are sideways - is that true??" I told him that since I was only half ASIAN that my pussy was actually DIAGONAL...oh, and "by the way, I heard that white men have small dicks - is that true??"
I had one guy tell me stories about how he's in the KKK just so that I would leave his table --- he only likes the white girls I guess...
I had several guys try to stiff me on dances before. They promptly got thrown out.
I had many instances of dancers, to change the subject, stealing my clothes, shoes, etc.
I've had dancers try to steal my regulars by telling them lies about me, like I was pregnant or that I was about to get married - NOT TRUE!
I've seen dancers sit their ass down at a famous football player's table (won't mention his name) without his knowledge and order drinks on his tab.
I've had a guy try to grope me while I was on stage that would not stop until my screaming got the bouncer's attention. He was thrown out on his ass - literally.
I had one guy tell me he was going to get up to go to the restroom and when he got back he wanted me to have my bottoms off (this was a topless only club).
I hate the guys that come into the clubs with shorts on and no underwear. I did a dance once for one of these guys and I had my back turned for like 5 seconds. When I turned back around I saw his dick poking out of the edge of his shorts - disgusting!!
I really hate the guys that try to lick you everywhere.
God...I could go on forever...sorry this post is sooo long!! LMAO
The only thing that really bothers me are the "drive-byes" You may, or may not be a first-time visitor to a club and some air-head is in your face with...."wanna private dance?" No, hi my name is and yours? no nothing...
These dolts expect you to jump up before you can even order a drink for them? They are clueless...maybe you have a favorite that you want to see......?
- Here's one from the catagoy of "It sucks when it happens to you, but it's cool when it happens for you." Was once visiting a club for the first time and I took a seat at the tip rail. I place a $2 tip on the rail, and the dancer comes over to dance in front of me, but the whole time she's looking and winking at a guy sitting at a table behind me. Obviously he was a regular and I was new, but this was discouraging as far as prospects for getting private dances late. (Now, as hinted above, I have also been in the situation of the regular sitting back...man is it cool to be in that position!)
- Once made a return visit to a club I had not been to in a while. The place was a little distant from where I live, but I happened to be in the area. Knowing I was going to stop in I starting thinking of a beautiful woman I had the pleasure of meeting there before. I walked into the club full of anticipation, but was disappointed when I didn't see her. I sat for a little while hoping she would appear, and eventually struck up a conversation with another dancer. I asked if she knew the girl I was looking for, and she said, "yes" but did not think that she was working that day. She was cute and when she offered me a private dance I took her up on offer. As I came out of the private dance room, who was on stage, but the dancer I was originally hoping to see.
Alright. That's it for me. I hope you were able to have a laugh at my expense, but I would just like to say all of these times have been completely out weighted by the great times I've had and great people I've met in the clubs I've visited.
I've generally had decent luck in going to clubs. There are the usual little things, but nothing worth getting bent out of shape over. Life's to short.
Just for the sake of discussion, here is a list of some minor things which I find humorous more than anything:
- Dancers who come up and ask if you want a dance without a smile, without any enthusiasm, and without any intension of sitting down for a moment.
- Dancers who come up to you without any acknowledgement and just start giving you a cabaret, table dance or a stevie, when your just sitting at a table off stage, and then expect a tip. Worse is when they continue and your clearly not interested, and then they expect another tip.
- Once tipped a dancer I was just getting to know $5 dollars when she was on stage. She danced in front of me for another few seconds and then lifted her g-sting for another tip. (Cool thing was she later apologized, and explained that she didn't know the first tip was a $5. She made it up to me later!)
- Once was at a club during the afternoon. It wasn't very busy. I was sitting at a table with my drink, but I decided to go sit at the tip rail for a set with one of my favorite dancers. Now when I'm alone at a club I am usually willing to share a seat at the table I'm at, but when I got back a couple took my table and moved my drink to the bar counter. (It's not so bad, because I could picture someone else listing: "when a customer tries to save their seat with a drink while they go somewhere else.")
- On the same line of thought as the last one. Again I was alone and trying to save a seat, I left a drink while going to the tip rail, and the waitress clears it off the table. I loose the table and the drink! (Yeah, I know. I should just take the drink with me from now on.)
- One time in a men's room I was washing my hands and a guy was leaving behind me and joked, "You know you wouldn't have to do that if you didn't piss all over your hands." (I know he was just re-using an old joke.) I was not offended, but the club I was at allowed contact, and I thought it was disrespectful to the dancers he planed to go out and meet.
- Granted the club was busy. One night I was sitting at small table for two and the practically the whole time I was there I had the pleasure of being accompanied by one of my favorite dancers at the club. Then as soon as she got up to perform a set on stage a bouncer seated another customer in her seat. I tried to protest, but the bouncer explained that the customer having a seat was more important than the dancer. On some level I could understand that, but I was still PO'd.
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As far as high contact is concerned, I personally like a lot of contact and won't usually buy a lap dance unless some two-way touching is allowed. I've yet to meet the dancer who is so good that it's worth $400 per hour ($20 for 3 minutes) just to watch her dance. I usually ask a girl what her rules are in advance and try to respect them as much as possible. I can only remember one time that a girl told me in adnvace that she didn't like to be touched. I am especially offended when a girl gives every indication that lots of touching is OK until she has the $$$ in hand, then changes the rules. Obtaining money under false pretenses isn't any different than stealing in my book. I have never asked for extras although some have been offered to me on several occasions.
1. On a stage show once, a guy bit me on the crotch so hard I bled, he litterally dove in when opened my legs... I had him tossed out
2. Another time on stage...A guy grabbed my boob so hard and squeezed it I had a hand mark on my bood for a day an a half... he was also thrown out.
3. I a private dance, a guy tried to stick his finger up my bum as I was turned around... at a no touch club.. he was thrown out
4. I have been bit.. licked.. grabbed.. smacked.. and had my hair pulled... yet I am still not bitter :)
5.I have given numerous private dances, that the guy all of a sudden didn't have enough to pay me afterwards
I have had guys get pissed off when they offer me a drink and tell them I do not drink and they tell me to leave.... The list could go on forever... but these were the first to come to mind
A few of my annoying experiences: the worst, which happens a lot, is when a girl either verbally or by her actions promises lots of contact, then objects to touching during the dance. Next would be when a girl is looking everywhere but at the customer during a private dance. When a girl acts anoyed when you say no to wannadance? When a girl sits down with you without asking and says buymeadrink? When you ask a girl to join you and she says she'll be right there then never shows up. But the worst that ever happened to me - I was sitting and talking with a girl who I had been with several times before and had always bought multiple private dances when one of her best customers came in, she excused herself to say hello to him (which is fine with me) and said she'd be right back, but an hour later she was still sitting with him (I left.) This was a girl who frequently complained to me about guys not respecting her.
Dancers --- ESPECIALLY THESE DAYS --- need to please have more respect for YOURSELVES. Unless a dancer respects herself enough to not put up with the nonsense, those kind of men will continue to be disrespect them. Noone respects someone that doesn't respect themself.
I had one redneck hick asshole ask me once while I was on a satellite stage, "I heard that Oriental women have pussy's that are sideways - is that true??" I told him that since I was only half ASIAN that my pussy was actually DIAGONAL...oh, and "by the way, I heard that white men have small dicks - is that true??"
I had one guy tell me stories about how he's in the KKK just so that I would leave his table --- he only likes the white girls I guess...
I had several guys try to stiff me on dances before. They promptly got thrown out.
I had many instances of dancers, to change the subject, stealing my clothes, shoes, etc.
I've had dancers try to steal my regulars by telling them lies about me, like I was pregnant or that I was about to get married - NOT TRUE!
I've seen dancers sit their ass down at a famous football player's table (won't mention his name) without his knowledge and order drinks on his tab.
I've had a guy try to grope me while I was on stage that would not stop until my screaming got the bouncer's attention. He was thrown out on his ass - literally.
I had one guy tell me he was going to get up to go to the restroom and when he got back he wanted me to have my bottoms off (this was a topless only club).
I hate the guys that come into the clubs with shorts on and no underwear. I did a dance once for one of these guys and I had my back turned for like 5 seconds. When I turned back around I saw his dick poking out of the edge of his shorts - disgusting!!
I really hate the guys that try to lick you everywhere.
God...I could go on forever...sorry this post is sooo long!! LMAO
These dolts expect you to jump up before you can even order a drink for them? They are clueless...maybe you have a favorite that you want to see......?
- Here's one from the catagoy of "It sucks when it happens to you, but it's cool when it happens for you." Was once visiting a club for the first time and I took a seat at the tip rail. I place a $2 tip on the rail, and the dancer comes over to dance in front of me, but the whole time she's looking and winking at a guy sitting at a table behind me. Obviously he was a regular and I was new, but this was discouraging as far as prospects for getting private dances late. (Now, as hinted above, I have also been in the situation of the regular sitting back...man is it cool to be in that position!)
- Once made a return visit to a club I had not been to in a while. The place was a little distant from where I live, but I happened to be in the area. Knowing I was going to stop in I starting thinking of a beautiful woman I had the pleasure of meeting there before. I walked into the club full of anticipation, but was disappointed when I didn't see her. I sat for a little while hoping she would appear, and eventually struck up a conversation with another dancer. I asked if she knew the girl I was looking for, and she said, "yes" but did not think that she was working that day. She was cute and when she offered me a private dance I took her up on offer. As I came out of the private dance room, who was on stage, but the dancer I was originally hoping to see.
Alright. That's it for me. I hope you were able to have a laugh at my expense, but I would just like to say all of these times have been completely out weighted by the great times I've had and great people I've met in the clubs I've visited.
Just for the sake of discussion, here is a list of some minor things which I find humorous more than anything:
- Dancers who come up and ask if you want a dance without a smile, without any enthusiasm, and without any intension of sitting down for a moment.
- Dancers who come up to you without any acknowledgement and just start giving you a cabaret, table dance or a stevie, when your just sitting at a table off stage, and then expect a tip. Worse is when they continue and your clearly not interested, and then they expect another tip.
- Once tipped a dancer I was just getting to know $5 dollars when she was on stage. She danced in front of me for another few seconds and then lifted her g-sting for another tip. (Cool thing was she later apologized, and explained that she didn't know the first tip was a $5. She made it up to me later!)
- Once was at a club during the afternoon. It wasn't very busy. I was sitting at a table with my drink, but I decided to go sit at the tip rail for a set with one of my favorite dancers. Now when I'm alone at a club I am usually willing to share a seat at the table I'm at, but when I got back a couple took my table and moved my drink to the bar counter. (It's not so bad, because I could picture someone else listing: "when a customer tries to save their seat with a drink while they go somewhere else.")
- On the same line of thought as the last one. Again I was alone and trying to save a seat, I left a drink while going to the tip rail, and the waitress clears it off the table. I loose the table and the drink! (Yeah, I know. I should just take the drink with me from now on.)
- One time in a men's room I was washing my hands and a guy was leaving behind me and joked, "You know you wouldn't have to do that if you didn't piss all over your hands." (I know he was just re-using an old joke.) I was not offended, but the club I was at allowed contact, and I thought it was disrespectful to the dancers he planed to go out and meet.
- Granted the club was busy. One night I was sitting at small table for two and the practically the whole time I was there I had the pleasure of being accompanied by one of my favorite dancers at the club. Then as soon as she got up to perform a set on stage a bouncer seated another customer in her seat. I tried to protest, but the bouncer explained that the customer having a seat was more important than the dancer. On some level I could understand that, but I was still PO'd.
That's it for now.