When you are over seventy who gives a shit

avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
Atlanta suburb
Cowboy: "Give me 3 packets of condoms, please."
Cashier: "Do you need a paper bag with that, sir?"
Cowboy: "Nah...She's purty good lookin'....."
When you are over seventy who gives a ....
***********

Some asshole looked at my beer belly last night and sarcastically said, "Is that Corona or Bud?"
I said, "There's a tap underneath; taste it and find out."
When you are over seventy who gives a ....?
***********

I was talking to a girl in the bar last night. She said, "If you lost a few pounds, had a shave and got your hair cut, you'd look all right."
I said, "If I did that, I'd be talking to your friends over there instead of you."
When you are over seventy who gives a ....?
***********

I was telling a girl in the bar about my ability to guess what day a woman was born just by feeling her boobs.
"Really" she said, "Go on then...try."
After about thirty seconds of fondling she began to lose patience and said, "Come on, what day was I born?"
I said, "Yesterday."
When you are over seventy who gives a ....?
***********

I got caught taking a pee in the swimming pool today.
The lifeguard shouted at me so loud, I nearly fell in.
When you are over seventy who gives a ....?
***********

I went to the bar last night and saw a fat chick dancing on a table. I said, "Great legs."
The girl giggled and said, "Do you really think so."
I said, "Definitely! Most tables would have collapsed by now."
When you are over seventy who gives a ....?

6 comments

Jump to latest
avatar for chandler
chandler
9 years ago
Those are great. I'm not waiting until I'm over 70 to repeat a couple of them. I already don't give a fuck.
avatar for tobala
tobala
9 years ago
You missed one.
Stripper: Wanna have sex for $50 ?
SC: I usually charge $100, but I guess I could make an exception.
avatar for ATACdawg
ATACdawg
9 years ago
Can't wait til I hit 70 so I can use these!

Well, maybe I can..... ;-)
avatar for crazyjoe
crazyjoe
9 years ago
Good stuff
avatar for VeryBigDawg
VeryBigDawg
9 years ago
:)
avatar for shadowcat
shadowcat
9 years ago
Yesterday I told a stripper that I could guess what day she was born by massaging her boobs. She fell for it. She raised up her top and let me have at it for a full minute before finally asking me what day she was born. Later I was massaging her clit and told her that I was now trying to figure out what year she was born in. She didn't buy that one. :)
You must be a member to leave a comment.Join Now