tuscl

Dating

GACA
Un-retired: Met my ATF. Married her. Divorcing her.
Wednesday, October 8, 2014 6:56 PM
I'm single looking for consistent access to some goodness. I'd like to try dating a stripper not just OTC shit. I'm not a white guy, and based on some of the comments of the ghetto-fication of SC's, I think that gives me at least some small advantage. Unfortunately I am from a middle class upbringing, so that brings it back slightly down. Anyways to anyone who has actually dated a stripper or several, how did you go about it, what's like the thing you do that you almost know will catch their interests and eventually lead to dates. Tips tips, no not that kind, I mean advice suggestions anecdotes. ..

39 comments

  • Mate27
    •
    10 years ago
    Live and learn my friend... Live and learn. I'm white middle class and soon you will realize that nothing is free, even fun. Consequences to every action, so live and learn..
  • mikeya02
    •
    10 years ago
    The best way to date a stripper is to be around her age, interesting, attractive, and you met her at the beach, or the club, or a party, or the mall,...etc. In the club? That's not where most strippers get their boyfriends. Good luck.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @Meat I understand nothing is free. I'm just looking for a discount.
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    I dunno man, you should be able to do the following: #1. Get in the club and be able to pass the dress code. Means no slippers or wife beaters. #2. Look confident, but not the kind of confidence that you go there almost everyday. #3. Once she approaches you and starts a convo, you should be able to carry and maintain the convo with the objective of you (yes you) are there to have some beer and fun with the right girl. It's important to say "The Right Girl." because she will now try to frame herself to be the right girl. #4. Escalate the convo so that she (not you) becomes touchy (handsy). if you can't get to this level in ten minutes, break the deal, she's going to make you pay for your stupidity of not smelling it. #5 At this point, you can take it wherever you want to go, both of you are like so inseparable with all that touching going on your only way out is through the lapdance area.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @alabegonz I can do that. But realistically, because we all know females require some semblance of familiarity to feel safe, is it your experience that you after this first ITC encounter all other encounters happen else where, or in your experience, have you frequented the place a time or two after and then made a play for the date. I'm asking because, I told one I wasn't coming back to the club and that if we wanted to keep this vibe going it had to be outside. She called me only to try to get me back into the club, I did not. And after a few weeks I did only because I have a new fav there. Anyway. Opening never a problem for me it's the closing I'm more interested in.
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    You never say the OTC word. She should say that. She should--at the bottom of hear (bleep)--will say "You know I like you I feel safe with you, let's go out, I have your digits anyway." That's my game, that's why I don't get that much compared to the pros who do it consistently.
  • jackslash
    •
    10 years ago
    Try carbon-14.
  • Estafador
    •
    10 years ago
    try a bar. Strippers don't meet their boyfriends at the strip club. Those men are called suckers...err I mean business associates
  • busta_nut
    •
    10 years ago
    Step 1.. supply her drugs. Step 2.. Quit your job. Step 3. Become homeless and crash at her place... and never leave. Step 4. Take all of her nightly earnings from her. Step 5. Repeat steps 1-4
  • jabthehut
    •
    10 years ago
    Well put busta!
  • PhantomGeek
    •
    10 years ago
    I haven't really dated any strippers recently; did OTC and ITC with a couple different dancers, but haven't had any real social interactions outside of the club with them. But back in the '90s, I did go out with a couple of dancers. (Hey, they were roommates. They were joined at the hip.) I had hung out at the club quite a bit -- too much, given my lack of income -- so a few of the dancers saw me as "safe" (and, yeah, probably even "sucker" by some). Anyway, one time, one of that pair waved me over to a side stage she was dancing on; she asked me if I wanted to go out to dinner with her, her roommate, and one of the guys who worked at the club. It caught me off guard, but I had to decline. I already had plans. (Hey, tickets to a live MST3K weren't cheap, and there was only the one show!) A month or two later, the two ladies and I (and one of my roommates) caught a movie. We met there. Each of us paid our own way. It was just platonic...or maybe a trial run; I was never too sure. The next time I was at the club, I tipped one of them stage-side (yeah, the one I was really interested in). She said that we should go to another movie, this time by ourselves. That really caught me off-guard because she said that we shouldn't ever talk about going out in front of people she worked with -- but another dancer was maybe five feet off to one side and a server was within arm's reach of me. (Yeah, we didn't wind up going out.) And then the next time I saw her, she told me that I didn't want to date her. Um...huh? A couple other dancers -- a couple of my regulars -- also stopped by the retail bookstore I worked at, too. They just wanted to say hi and visit. Nothing came of those visits though (doggone it all anyway). Different women are going to have different tastes and different levels of expectations. And dancers will probably have yet a different set of expectations, depending on their level of guardedness and suspicion. Nuts, your average civilian woman is pretty much going to expect a guy to look for sex, in addition to some conversation and quality time and whatever else; a dancer will probably expect that you'll be looking for nothing but sex from her. If you want a relationship, you'll probably have to give her time to size you up. Anyhow, long story short, good luck.
  • JohnSmith69
    •
    10 years ago
    I can't imagine why any knowledgeable person would want to date a stripper in the non-OTC sense of dating. There is no group of people in the world that leads a more dysfunctional lifestyle other than perhaps paranoid schizophrenics. I suppose some would think it is for the "free sex. " but if you want free sex become homosexual because there's no such thing as free sex from a woman. It's far cheaper to just pay them in cash than to become enmeshed in their lifestyle.
  • rockstar666
    •
    10 years ago
    Dating a stripper may seem like a fun thing to do, but you'll quickly realize it's more stress than it's worth. They will cancel at the last minute a lot, take care of personal business when she should be paying attention to you, and as soon as she takes for granted that you'll be there for her will start fucking someone else. The best OTC relationship is just having sex with a pretty girl. Leave the actual relationships to normal girls.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    I get what every one is saying but for me it's more of a Bucket List, I'm not trying to get married or take it too seriously. But appreciate the reality check
  • bvino
    •
    10 years ago
    I met a dancer under non-club circumstances and we "dated" for about three months. She led a chaotic ,episodic life and was never where she said she would be or on time. I was flexible and it was fun but it wasn't much better than the occasional OTC or VIP visit. A lot less drama that way. Go meet a nice girl and leave dancers for the fun times.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    10 years ago
    I would say if you are more than 10 years older than the avg stripper; then she will probably be w/ you solely for financial reasons. If you are broke; then you have nothing to lose – if you have/make decent $$$; then be prepared to take care of her “emergencies” or at least be hit up for them.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    10 years ago
    Strippers are usually available, especially on the night shift. The problem is that most of the guys they deal with just want P4P. So she just needs to understand from you what you are wanting. Sure, because you met her in an SC, there may be a couple more hoops to jump through. She does have to be careful. Most of the guys who come on to her, do eventually chicken out. But if your objective is just a discount, then no. That won't work. A guy who really wants to know her is not just someone who wants P4P at a discount. Maniac's article and my post. People didn't understand his article because they are only thinking P4P. [view link] What Alabegonz is saying I basically agree with. [view link] SJG Killing Me Softly [view link]
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @SJG obviously the disco thing was a joke. My point is I keep finding "nice girls" who are freaky in the beginning and then later accuse Mr if treating them like strippers. So I decided some time ago wouldn't it be neat to actually date a stripper, bucket list wise, I up for the adventure. Not expecting it to be healthy experience at all, just crazy and one for the memory bank.
  • jerikson40
    •
    10 years ago
    Maybe if you can act like a complete a-hole, not a nice guy, treat her like dirt, act like you don't give a shit about her, and just use her as a sex toy it will work. Seriously, I think a lot of strippers (and many women in general) prefer the perceived bad boy to the nice guy who they can wrap around their fingers and get them to pay their bills. Be an asshole. Have fun.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @jerikson Well duh.... known that since high school. Again, it's tricky to deal with nice girls because takes more reading into how they want to be treated. At least with a stripper I know the role.
  • jerikson40
    •
    10 years ago
    Yeah, I know it's "duh..", but for a lot of guys, and apparently a lot of guys on this site, kissing dancers' butts and playing nice guy and white knight seem far more prevalent than being bad boys. Even once I learned their game, it's much more natural for me to be a nice guy with a woman, so it takes a lot of conscious effort to tap the brakes on that. But it sounds like you're going into this with a good perspective, so just be careful. Dem bitches can be hypnotic....
  • sharkhunter
    •
    10 years ago
    I'd rather meet the hot dancers who tell me they only want to have sex, not go out to dinner or dates. Of course I spent more time with the dancers who just wanted to go places with me. We weren't dating, just having fun or hanging out or visiting clubs together or whatever.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @sharkhunter Sorry for your PL experience. But I intend to take advantage of my stripper girlfriend for all the times a stripper took advantage of a "nice guy" like you. And from what I'm hearing about stripper being crazy, then I must have been dating soon-to-be strippers a lot in life and had no clue.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    10 years ago
    I don't think this is really that big of a deal. If you are just yourself and honest with her, then you shouldn't have any problem. If you straight with her, she will recognize that at once. No reason to use an code language or to act like you are trying to work it some particular way. Just let her see you as you are. If she is not accustomed to OTC and FS-ITC and all, then if you are straight with her about who you are and what you do and don't talk about it like you are looking for OTC, then you should have no problem. If she is fully professionalized, and in effect an escort, then it might take a little bit longer, but it should still work. Most of the guys she meets who take an interest in her give up after a while, not because she is not available, but because she is available. They run away with their tails between their legs. It is easier for a girl to sell sex than it is to give it away. She will get more takers and have less problems by selling it. So a guy who really is open to a relationship is a rarity. Again, most who might present themselves this way will eventually turn chicken and run from her. As far as how your relationship with her might go if you don't chicken out and stick with it, who knows. It certainly won't be any worse than my long term marriage to a total civilian was. If she is reluctant at first, like to give out a phone number or to agree to go out with you, then just make a return visit or two and that should do it. Because of her job and where you are meeting her, she does have to be a bit careful. Otherwise there should be no problem. This is my own experience, and I know it runs contrary to what those who see strippers only as P4P will say. I guess I've never been completely taken in by the girls' on the job personas. If you are being straight, then she will start to be too. Good Luck! [view link] SJG Pearl Jam ft Neil Young [view link]
  • sharkhunter
    •
    10 years ago
    Yeah, I just had free sex with dancers and we often did it quickly after meeting without dating first. I didn't spend money or time going out to eat etc etc. I was perfectly happy with having fuck buddies who were dancers. After that we often just went places or hung out. I leave out details sometimes. I had fun or I wouldn't have been meeting up. I always thought of dating dancers as something PL's do trying to have sex. just my opinion.
  • sharkhunter
    •
    10 years ago
    I really do not like to call going out a date or dating. It sounds so formal. I also did not want to think of myself as being a dancers boyfriend but if she had no boyfriend except she was seeing me, that's a gray area. I didn't want to think about relationships or that I was in one. That's probably why after an argument, one hot dancer tried to threaten me by saying she was going to visit me at work and home and tell everyone something. I had been trying to avoid getting into a relationship and wasn't thinking at times.
  • sharkhunter
    •
    10 years ago
    As far as tips, things may have changed or they might not have. If a dancer is willing, meeting up to have fun often leads to more. If she enjoys the sex and your company, you might become a dancers boyfriend without realizing it. I tried to avoid that because I get the sense some girls want more than just a boyfriend. If she's thinking I'm her boyfriend but I don't and am looking around, someone's not going to be happy.
  • alabegonz
    •
    10 years ago
    "Opening never a problem for me it's the closing I'm more interested in." It really depends on how you setup the stage. In order to close, the stage must be set, like all boxes must have a check on them, otherwise it won't work. Like the tall dancer I met and is now my CF #2. She felt she has to do something that moment because I only showed up once and will likely not show up again. I sold her that idea and she bought it big time. On the other hand, regarding my CF #1, she did all the talking and dealing and those things she said to me were all super, I bought it right away, I just sat there watching her do the selling, hell yes, she was selling an idea and I thought it was a good idea, and finally after the quick convo I finally said yes. Dude, bro, you should be able to do it like it should flow out naturally from the inside out. After that, it was good and we were cool, it was still like we are in honeymoon. And then, boom!!! Man, if you ask me right now how am I feeling about it I would say maybe I made a big mistake of dating her and getting to know the real person that she is right now.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    10 years ago
    GACAclub, You wrote, "My point is I keep finding "nice girls" who are freaky in the beginning and then later accuse Mr if treating them like strippers" You've peaked my curiosity. What do they mean, "treating them like strippers"? Are you expecting them to wear high heels and makeup when they are alone with you? Are you expecting them to put on some sort of a show for you? Do you like to sit down and have them stand in front of you while you fondle them at arms length? Do you like to photograph them? These are the things I like. Most of the time women are too self conscious to put on much of a show in private. Even professional strippers have a hard time doing this. When they are on the job they get real psyched up. But in private it is hard for them. But if you make it instead hands on, fondling at arms length, then they really love it as the fondling relaxes them and lets them know that you really like them. Is this what they mean, that you want them to supply a visual and somewhat kinky dimension? Or are they speaking of how you actually manage the relationship and of aspects which make them feel disposable? I am curious to know. [view link] SJG Black Magic Woman [view link] Ventures
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    Good question SJG. I don't know. Think they felt like sex toys, and yes I'd ask them too look nice so I would maintain my interests. Was in my twenties, I'll readily admit sex was the single most important thing to me at the time. Even now in my thirties it's pretty high on the list. But at the same time is was a total gentleman. Made sure their friends and family like me, spent what I had to show them a good time and all that. Tried to do whatever was important ant to them. But again what was important to me was having great sex. Probably a little more wild than normal, but not BDSM shit. Made sure they got off too. I just think they hated the frequency in which I required it. So, more than a few told me I treated them like strippers. I'm curious what a stripper would say I'm treating her like :)
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @Sharkhunter I don't mind calling hanging out dating. Whatever, as long as I get some assistance whole we're hanging out you can call she can say I'm her boyfriend for all I care. At the end of the day, when shit hits the fan I'm out.
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @Albegonz so, after catching up on a few more of your posts your cool if I don't take your advice right :)
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @Bullwinkle that post had me laughing for days... pour lye...omfg that shot was funny.
  • Josh43
    •
    10 years ago
    "I can't imagine why any knowledgeable person would want to date a stripper in the non-OTC sense of dating. There is no group of people in the world that leads a more dysfunctional lifestyle other than perhaps paranoid schizophrenics. " JS69 nails it. LOL!
  • GACA
    •
    10 years ago
    @alabegonz I think you're success with strippers has been linked to the fact that you actually start buying into the relationship yourself. That's an important technique. I think what I could do better is selling a story I at least half heartedly believe in. Make it feel real. Actually great piece of advice. Thank you sir.
  • san_jose_guy
    •
    10 years ago
    Asking them to dress nice, for being in public, I don't think that would be a problem. Most of them would go for that anyway. ( Except for some indoctrinated with certain flavors of Feminism whom I have had the misfortune of knowing. ) But what I was getting at was asking them to be in high heels and makeup, and maybe just a bit else, in private. Non-strippers may well go for this. Actual pro-strippers, maybe? It depends on how it is presented to then and on how they come to understand it as functioning. I think sex can't be just about the two people, rather it has to be made into a pagan religious ritual. GACAclub, yes it sounds like you are being very nice and proper with them. Good Luck! SJG Karen Armstrong - Religion and the History of Violence [view link]
  • GACA
    •
    9 years ago
    So I got a stripper on booty call. A while the slut factor is particularly appealing I've dated chicks who were way better in bed and 10 x more slutty. Color me unimpressed.
  • GACA
    •
    9 years ago
    And hell ya you all were right about the drug infused dysfunction... I'm over it. Bitch did like four lines in front of me.
  • GACA
    •
    9 years ago
    In a sex shop while she buys a vubrator
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