Orgasm Responsibility
jerikson40
New York
Not long ago, in one of the threads here, somebody (not sure who) mentioned, rather matter-of-factly, that he always considered each person responsible for their own orgasm.
At the time that seemed rather shocking, and at odds with what I've always assumed is each partner's obligation to do his/her part in assisting the other in achieving orgasm. But I'm wondering if it really has some merit. I'm not saying it's wrong, and in fact it might be right, it's just something that seems to be the opposite of what I've always believed.
Clearly, a woman generally needs a certain environment and emotional state to achieve orgasm. Guys can knock it out standing on a subway platform waiting for the A train if the chick is hot enough and he's horny enough. But with women you need to lay some groundwork, and make the sex act enjoyable, with the right rhythm and emotion, etc. Sure, sometimes women can also knock it out on a subway platform, but generally they need the right environment. And yeah, men also need certain factors to align in order to achieve the optimum blast off.
So I'm curious...
How do you guys feel about the concept of each person is responsible for his/her own orgasm? Have I been living in a misconception all these years?
At the time that seemed rather shocking, and at odds with what I've always assumed is each partner's obligation to do his/her part in assisting the other in achieving orgasm. But I'm wondering if it really has some merit. I'm not saying it's wrong, and in fact it might be right, it's just something that seems to be the opposite of what I've always believed.
Clearly, a woman generally needs a certain environment and emotional state to achieve orgasm. Guys can knock it out standing on a subway platform waiting for the A train if the chick is hot enough and he's horny enough. But with women you need to lay some groundwork, and make the sex act enjoyable, with the right rhythm and emotion, etc. Sure, sometimes women can also knock it out on a subway platform, but generally they need the right environment. And yeah, men also need certain factors to align in order to achieve the optimum blast off.
So I'm curious...
How do you guys feel about the concept of each person is responsible for his/her own orgasm? Have I been living in a misconception all these years?
Got something to say?
Start your own discussion
14 comments
I am basically in agreement with you, if you are talking about FS, or DATY.
As far as what is going on in SC's with the dry humping, the HJ/BJ routine and the entire "extras" approach. I've never gone along with that.
Blue Balls?
https://www.tuscl.net/postread.php?PID=3…
If I am out on a train platform and a hot chick walks by, I don't want to jerk off. I don't want her to give me a BBBJ either. I want to chase after her and chat her up, with the eventual intent of fucking her. I want her to yield to me. And then of course we will both make sure the other gets off.
But see, I treat all women like civilians, in all situations, no exceptions. So this does not change in AMPs or SCs. I'm not looking for some service or "extras", I want female submission. I want her to be eating out of my hand.
A couple of times they have told me of DATY before FS, "You've made me come already."
"You silly, I'm going to take it slow and easy with you. You'll come many many time."
When I'm FSing them, I'm getting of on their faces, their tits, the shaping of their hips, the sounds of their voices, their breathing, and their muscle tensions. This is what makes it go on and on and on. One learns this by studying Tantra.
SJG
Deep Purple, Perfect Strangers
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNiqA_lyn…
I almost peed my fucking drawers with that one. You have to actually meet and talk to a woman first, you pathetic virgin.
I'm talking about real women. Though maybe this isn't the place to discuss since apparently most of the experience seems to be with only strippers?
OK, I'm out of this discussion if that is the case coz most I deal with nowadays are all strippers.
Regular women are still fine with me, but I don't chase them like I used to. Go ahead and talk about them I will not be interested in that, there's a ton of that talk wherein these people talk about regular women.
Its with the deepest respect that I say this...
HUH ???????
I've felt that way for a long time. I will do damn near anything she asks in order to help her orgasm, but ultimately, I'm not *responsible* for it.
@lopaw: Nope, made perfect sense to me. The choices we make determine how successful we are at sex (not to mention everything else). If I choose someone with whom I can't cum, and then choose her again, that's *my* problem.
I don't go along with this "extras" model, or the idea that it is a strippers job to get me off. What I want to do, is to get to her.
I think we need to get beyond talking about "extras" and "mileage", and instead start talking about the quality of FS being offered.
David Blight
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QXXp1bHd6…
Civil War and Reconstruction