Yesterday I was out working and I ended up meeting a couple I knew of but had not met. We have a mutual friend. They ended up turning the conversation to Jesus talk. That was fine for a while. Then they asked if they could pray for me. They were in their truck and about to leave so I said ok thinking they would leave. Then they both laid their hands on me and tried to summon Jesus to heal my ailments.
I started having a really difficult time keeping a strait face. All I could think of is what if I summoned the devil to kick their asses? Lol
My ailments remained the same and I have a feeling if I summoned the devil their asses would have remained un kicked
"O here's to my sweet Satan. The one whose little path would make me sad, whose power is satan. He'll give those with him 666, there was a little toolshed where he made us suffer, sad Satan."
I have no frickin' idea why the satanic toolshed is in there, but it SOUNDS EVIL!!!
On the other hand, it could be Robert Plant telling us he likes pasta. Or maybe there is no backward masking in there at all. But that's just crazy talk!
We can have church right here. We just need the lord to declare getting bj's as an acceptable form of worship. Dancers can get their daily worship out of the way faster.
If we set up the strip club as a house of titty and bj worship, maybe we could get tax free status too after the lawyers declare it is a religion. We probably need to add some wacky laws like most states do, like you can't fuck your wife on Sunday between 10 and 11 am if you hold your hand behind your head.
Religion was a way to help keep anarchy from reigning and to try and explain things that weren't explainable before science and logic could do the trick. It gave reason to why we shouldn't do others wrong and, generally, keep most people happy, even if the answer was basically like your Mom telling a child, "Because I say so." It also gave us a little more of a reason to live and live well rather than just be selfish bastards, since it gave us the idea of an afterlife in which what we did here mattered. It's supposed to be a general moral code.
The problem is, people lose the forest through the trees. Granted, this has been happening forever, such as The Crusades and saying things like all forms of birth control are bad. General moral code, not strict adherence to rules that don't make sense and often oppose the general purpose to begin with. And when you start denying science and logic because of religion, you not only missed the boat, you missed the whole damn ocean (though I do think climate change might be exaggerated, given we can't even accurately forecast the weather three days from now).
As such, people like the ones from the original encounter are crazy because they don't recognize their happiness shouldn't derive from depriving others of theirs through nonsensical ritual.
I don't mind if you want to live your life by scripture, believe in God, Jesus, Tom Cruise or anyone else Will Ferrell screamed out to while running in his underwear during "Talladega Nights." And hey, if religion benefits me or others, such as lunch after church, a program to help homeless folks have shelter or a Catholic college helping folks in an NCAA pool, more power to the people involved for achieving the general goal.
Do whatever makes you happy and if it makes others happy, great. But start judging me for what makes me and the people in my life happy, looking down on me or trying to change me, especially if what we do has nothing to do with you, and then we've got a problem.
I do believe things happen for a reason and that sometimes things fall just way too perfectly for there not to be some kind of divine hand. But, I also believe that maybe it's just way too complicated for human beings to understand and, maybe, we aren't meant to, so we shouldn't bother. So, I don't bother.
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"O here's to my sweet Satan. The one whose little path would make me sad, whose power is satan. He'll give those with him 666, there was a little toolshed where he made us suffer, sad Satan."
I have no frickin' idea why the satanic toolshed is in there, but it SOUNDS EVIL!!!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=eK7JHzLBPcc
If we set up the strip club as a house of titty and bj worship, maybe we could get tax free status too after the lawyers declare it is a religion. We probably need to add some wacky laws like most states do, like you can't fuck your wife on Sunday between 10 and 11 am if you hold your hand behind your head.
Religion was a way to help keep anarchy from reigning and to try and explain things that weren't explainable before science and logic could do the trick. It gave reason to why we shouldn't do others wrong and, generally, keep most people happy, even if the answer was basically like your Mom telling a child, "Because I say so." It also gave us a little more of a reason to live and live well rather than just be selfish bastards, since it gave us the idea of an afterlife in which what we did here mattered. It's supposed to be a general moral code.
The problem is, people lose the forest through the trees. Granted, this has been happening forever, such as The Crusades and saying things like all forms of birth control are bad. General moral code, not strict adherence to rules that don't make sense and often oppose the general purpose to begin with. And when you start denying science and logic because of religion, you not only missed the boat, you missed the whole damn ocean (though I do think climate change might be exaggerated, given we can't even accurately forecast the weather three days from now).
As such, people like the ones from the original encounter are crazy because they don't recognize their happiness shouldn't derive from depriving others of theirs through nonsensical ritual.
I don't mind if you want to live your life by scripture, believe in God, Jesus, Tom Cruise or anyone else Will Ferrell screamed out to while running in his underwear during "Talladega Nights." And hey, if religion benefits me or others, such as lunch after church, a program to help homeless folks have shelter or a Catholic college helping folks in an NCAA pool, more power to the people involved for achieving the general goal.
Do whatever makes you happy and if it makes others happy, great. But start judging me for what makes me and the people in my life happy, looking down on me or trying to change me, especially if what we do has nothing to do with you, and then we've got a problem.
I do believe things happen for a reason and that sometimes things fall just way too perfectly for there not to be some kind of divine hand. But, I also believe that maybe it's just way too complicated for human beings to understand and, maybe, we aren't meant to, so we shouldn't bother. So, I don't bother.