newbie

avatar for wren8
wren8
newbie here, so ive been lurking for awhile, but want some advice. divorced a year ago, frequenting clubs quite a bit last 3 monts. have my eye on a girl. i got a regular 9 to 5 and a little girl part time, so not a lot of time, so i go to the club once a week or less. im the guy that picks only one girl, i know pathetic, call it what you will. i drop several benjis at a time, usually monopolizing her for an hour at least. i have her number and we txt infrequently and its always pretty short.

ive danced around the otc topic, but have never asked outright. she says yes, but then i think she says yes to anything i ask her, because i dont think she wants to lose me as a customer, so not sure if i am getting strung along. ive never really done this before so my question is how to i approach this? do i flat out and ask? i admit -- and i know the beating im about to take from lurking -- that i am a little emotionally attached, but i know i can keep my distance, but i really just want a couple of otc's with her over the next few months. how do i go about getting that?

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avatar for mrrock
mrrock
12 years ago
Yep just come out and ask. I usually say something like "Do you like to party OTC? I think we could have some fun" or "Do you do private shows outside of the club?" The second one works well cause if they say yes then they will certainly do more than "just dance". Good luck!
avatar for boogieknight369
boogieknight369
12 years ago
Have you gone further than dances itc? If so she's definitely down for otc with a regular. Otherwise, just ask. Be honest, tell her what you expect and what you'll pay. Don't worry about her shooting you down, you'll find someone else, which would be a good thing for you. The more you do this the better you get at detaching yourself emotionally. It takes us custies a few rounds to realize it's better to just enjoy the ride then to get attached.
avatar for gatorfan
gatorfan
12 years ago
Pull out your dick during the lap dance is a nice way to send the right message.
avatar for kingcripple
kingcripple
12 years ago
its always going to be infrequent and short. the texting that is. i too like to get one girl. not so pathetic. you could just come right out and ask i suppose
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
As was suggested, saying “Do you do private shows outside of the club?" is probably a pretty safe way to go about it IMO.

I would imagine she would ask as to what you exactly have in mind.

You could say something along the lines “I find you very attractive and I would like to be intimate with you”. May be kind of lame to put it this way, but at least it’s kind of safe and she may not be taken aback that much if she is not into the OTC thing.

But if you do set it up, as others will tell you, and you may have read via your “lurking” – make sure you are both on the same page about what is expected and for how much – just be tactful about the way you put it since you don’t seem to be sure about her - but put in never the less.

Also, the fact that she gave you her # is a descent sign, not a sure sign, but a descent one that she may perhaps partake in “side business”.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
BTW – asking about OTC is not anything out of the realm of SCville. It may not seem natural at first that’s for sure, but it’s like anything else you do for the 1st time – it’s like riding a bike man :)
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
BTW – one thing you should definitely *not* do is let her know where you live or work – the less she knows about you the better.
avatar for boogieknight369
boogieknight369
12 years ago
Agree with papi on all
avatar for staxwell
staxwell
12 years ago
<---nice staxwell.

Everyone gave good advice.

I like the honest up front approach. Say this (like a caveman) "Me want sex!" or (with a smile) "I'd like to have sex with you.". See how those work ;).

Bullwinkle, you're a smart man. A smart smart man.
avatar for Papi_Chulo
Papi_Chulo
12 years ago
Yeah OP – listen to Bullwinkle – his words are wise and sound like the words of experience.
avatar for boogieknight369
boogieknight369
12 years ago
For a newbie who hasn't posted a single review, your getting a shit-ton of good advice. Appreciate it and take it to heart.
avatar for Alucard
Alucard
12 years ago
Just ask.
avatar for MADDOG_ROMEO
MADDOG_ROMEO
12 years ago
Here's some more advice....lol

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qqXi8WmQ_…
avatar for staxwell
staxwell
12 years ago
Sing her the lyrics to In-a-Gadda-Da-Vida by Iron Butterfly.

Sing it EXACTLY the way Ingle did.
avatar for grand1511
grand1511
12 years ago
Is it worth it to keep weekly spending about $200 to wonder if you could or could not be getting more OTC? Answer that question and you'll know what the next step should be.
avatar for wren8
wren8
12 years ago
i am in dfw. the club is byob all nude. she lets me do pretty much whatever i want but will usually stop me in a playful way after awhile if i put my fingers in her. ive never gone to vip. i usually dont carry that kind of money on me, but really, it just seems kinda awkward and scary. i used to go to clubs a lot when i was younger before i was married but that was in my 20s when i was broke and really just being stupid and drunk with friends. i am in my 30s now and spending a few hundred a week isnt that big a deal but money is money, and yes, i would rather be otc.

so ok, i will just call it out next time i see her. i really do appreciate the advice, especially since i havent posted a review. i will post one soon, thanks again.
avatar for carolynne
carolynne
12 years ago
i think you're already dangerously attached. if she's the wrong type you will be taken for a ride (and not in a good way). right now you're just focused on doing her, the real question is what will you want after you've done otc? she's probably not the next mrs. wren8
avatar for windowsidiot
windowsidiot
12 years ago
Just went through similar experience. Finally took her to hotel and she was the worst lay ever. Made it easy to delete from cell and go to club at different time. Thinking of escorts. Cheaper in the long run w no emotional baggage. Have fun.
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