How to tell when you're getting bored in a stripclub.

This is a girl I gotta meet! Is she in Memphis, by any chance?

I'm not surprised that people with "extraordinary" (in the sense of, outside the norm, though not necessarily superior) mental skills end up in the stripping profession.

There's a stripper Chitown and I know who talks like she's barely conscious and can't remember the questions she asked you two minutes earlier. Challege her to a game of video trivia, though, and suddenly she turns into Ken Jennings with tits.

There are of course the video trivia games. Every club around here seems to have one -- and the girls love them. They play little card games like Klondike solitaire, or spot-the-picture, or word-find games. The sorts of games that grandmas used to buy books of at the train station.

or when all the dancing stages are empty and you're thinking...

now why did I come here?... how long do they keep the stages empty?.... It's not close to closing time is it?

or it's after 830 pm and you're wondering when the dancers are going to start dancing and when you are no longer going to be 1/4 of the customers in the building.

Here's another one from years ago. You know you're bored when you're waiting in a line to play arcade or pinball games in a strip club.

or how about reaching an all time high score of over a 1,000,000 points on an old classic I think it was called Galaga. Couldn't have done it without the beer making my thinking and reflexes speed up.

Actually I wish they still had that entertainment in some local strip clubs to pass the time when certain dancers are the only ones dancing.

When I look around the room and wonder if it's just me or if everybody else is bored, too.

When I pay attention to the stage even though the dancer isn't hot and is acting bored herself.

When I pay attention to what the DJ is saying.

when I make rounds at the club for a SECOND time.

When you ask the bartender or another staff member are there any more girls coming in tonight. Specifically your favorite or one of your favorite dancers.

You start calculating how much money you've spent ($3 valet parking, $10 cover, $6 beer, $1 tip) and decide that you'd rather waste that money than another minute at this club...

I am consistently thinking all three of those things almost all the time that I'm in a strip club. ... heh ... Maybe I'm just a boring (or easily bored) person?