NFL Playoff Predictions- Based Solely On Team City Stripclub Strength

minnow
Any place that interests me.
OK, the time of the year for Playoff Predictions. This is my tongue-in-cheek guess, based on perceived strength of the city's stripclubs. I weigh factors like quantity and quality of clubs, Tuscl ratings, mileage, etc. First post covers AFC Playoffs
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NEW YORK VS INDIANAPOLIS: New York has the edge in quantity, and some high in quality. Indy has the definite edge in value for $, mileage delivered for the average customer, and overall satisfaction/enjoyment. New York may roll up some yardage, but Indy will score (and stop) when things count. Indy has higher rated area T100 clubs (#4, 17, 35) vs NYC (# 30, 33, 60, and 98)// COLTS 24-17

BALTIMORE VS KANSAS CITY: No contest here- Baltimore has 29 clubs, including one ranked in T100, Kansas City has maybe 6-9 clubs, none rated in T100. Long distance help from Outhouse in nearby KS isn't anywhere near enough to overcome "The Block", plus a few T100 clubs in MD suburbs.// COLTS 17-3

22 comments

  • minnow
    14 years ago
    PART 2- NFC PLAYOFFS
    *************************************************************

    NEW ORLEANS VS SEATTLE- This is an ugly matchup in that neither city is that great for clubs. New Orleans has the edge in number of clubs [17-21] vs 9 for Sea-Tac metro area. However, Nola has rep for being low mileage, high priced tourist traps. Having Ricks go down hurt the Seattle area scene. Recent posts by area residents begging for info on good road trips speaks volumes on the weakness of Seattle stripclub scene// SAINTS 13-6

    GREEN BAY VS PHILADELPHIA- This is a no-brainer: Philly has 30 clubs, including 3 in Tuscl T100, Green Bay has a whopping THREE stripclubs. (Is the only WI club to make T100 weighing in at #54 anywhere near Green Bay?). Even if it is, Philly gets abundant long distance help from some PA and NJ suburb clubs.// EAGLES 24-3
  • Clubber
    14 years ago
    Better redo KC and Baltimore. :)
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    Baltimore, Maryland
    Philadelphia, Pennsylvania
    are both Top Destinations on TUSCL.

    Thanks for doing these. We will see how it goes.
  • farmerart
    14 years ago
    I am going to hijack this thread and move to Stanley Cup playoffs. Using minnow's thesis and MY research the dream match-up would be: Toronto Maple Leafs - Detroit Red Wings.
    Cannonball vs. Bogarts.
    Million Dollar vs. H8S.
    New Locomotion vs. Henry's North
    Brass Rail vs. Landing Strip
    Club Pro vs. Flight Club

    I wouldn't be watching much hockey!!!
  • steve229
    14 years ago
    Thanks minnow, I always enjoy your "predictions."
  • vincemichaels
    14 years ago
    I'm with steve229, thanks minnow.
  • CTQWERTY
    14 years ago
    Art, I think you'll generate NHL interest if you include "He shoots and SCORES!!!"
  • Clubber
    14 years ago
    CT,

    In our world, might that be "He SCORES and shoots!!!" :)
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    Clubber- How so?? In what way(s) is my estimation of the relative merits of Bal vs KC stripclub scene off the mark? How does your experience/research differ from mine? Your score estimate? (disregarding the actual team merits, of course)

    farmerart- I guess I'll let you "skate" on thread hijack.
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    minnow, I think he was talking about how at the end of the Bal vs KC you wrote COLTS 17-3 instead of RAVENS 17-3
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    Correction: Oops, sometimes old habits are hard to break. RAVENS OVER CHIEFS 17-3
  • Clubber
    14 years ago
    minnow,

    BALTIMORE VS KANSAS CITY: No contest here- Baltimore has 29 clubs, including one ranked in T100, Kansas City has maybe 6-9 clubs, none rated in T100. Long distance help from Outhouse in nearby KS isn't anywhere near enough to overcome "The Block", plus a few T100 clubs in MD suburbs.// COLTS 17-3


    Read the above, COMPLETELY. One might focus on the first and last lines. :)
  • Clubber
    14 years ago
    minnow,

    Sort of like I should read ALL the posts before I respond. :)
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    ROUND 2/ ROUND 1 RECAP **********************************

    Round 1 not so good, batted .250. Perhaps Ricks will make a comeback in Seattle?? Here comes Round 2 predictions, again based solely on city/area stripclub strengths: AFC (Next Post will be NFC)

    NEW YORK VS NEW ENGLAND- Both cities/ metro fan areas hard to pin down, though New York has edge in number of clubs (15-36) vs Boston (3- maybe 32 in state of MA). NYC also has edge in number of T100 clubs (3) vs 1 for Boston area. Boston has a rep for very low mileage, though it gets a certain ammount of long distance help from Providence ( exact opposite in mileage). New York isn't exactly the best value for average sc patron, though some clubs in NJ are, though this long distance help dilluted by a certain number of Jets or Eagles fans. We could go back and forth on this, which is what the game will probably be. // JETS 24-23

    BALTIMORE VS PITTSBURGH: Again, Baltimore faces a city/metro area with a dearth of stripclubs (3 downtown, 11 total in metro area, none rated in T100). Just can't compete with "Baltimore Block"// RAVENS 20-6
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    ROUND 2 NFC PLAYOFFS PART 2 **********************************

    GREEN BAY VS ATLANTA- A low mileage city with few stripclubs (3) vs a low mileage city with a lot of stripclubs (37). Cheeseheads vs Cheetah Girls portends Atlanta edge in time of possesion. Neither city had any clubs in T100, though I know Atlanta had at least 1 in T100 in the past, maybe 3. Not high scoring, but enough to score// FALCONS 17-3

    SEATTLE VS CHICAGO- Ugh, 2 cities low on nearly every stripclub hounds wish list. Re- number of threads from area club goers asking for road trip advice. Surprisingly, Chicago area clubs have 3 in T100 ( weighing in at #'s 19, 77, and 85). Quantity over quality, best of bad bunch, etc. Then again, could say the same thing about long distance help from Portland, OR rankings. Ricks- Seattle being taken down by LE implies the margin of victory will be a Safety in a low scoring game// BEARS 11-9
  • shadowcat
    14 years ago
    minnow, I have to correct you. Atlanta does have a club in the T100. Follies is currently #22.
  • Clubber
    14 years ago
    minnow,

    Using your formula, which team should win the SB every season? Just a thought.
  • steve229
    14 years ago
    ^^^^
    Wouldn't it be Detroit vs Houson every year? (with Tampa sneaking in as a wild card every few years)
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    I wonder when or if Las Vegas is going to have professional sports teams. They have been trying to be more of a family friendly city.

    New England has a lot of little dives with extras so maybe New England will be a close contender with NYC.
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    ROUND 3/ROUND 2 RECAP ######################################

    Round 2 shot .500, a little better, but not so hot. Here goes.....

    NEW YORK VS PITTSBURGH: No competition in quality and quantity of core city clubs (NY favor). As for long distance help, not much for outlying areas. Morgantown, WV?? Heard a few good things there, but nothing earth shattering. Far more NJ and CT suburb help. Maybe Akron, Eastern OH? Just as likely to have Browns fans as Steelers fans. No TD's for Pitt, not enough long FG's// JETS 20-9

    GREEN BAY VS CHICAGO: Neither city is on a monger wish list, even though Chitown has 3 T100 clubs. I supppose Hammond, IN (Industrial Strip) might have some Bears fans. But, THREE stripclubs in Green Bay, and ONE T100 club in WI?? Just be glad the Pack isn't playing Bucs, Dolphins, or Texans.// BEARS 13-3
  • samsung1
    14 years ago
    Rick's Cabaret could see $2 mln Super Bowl boost

    Jan 21 (Reuters) - Strip club operator Rick's Cabaret International Inc (RICK.O) could see as much as $2 million in extra business from the Super Bowl next month, the chief executive said on Friday.

    Rick's, which owns seven clubs in the Dallas-Forth Worth market where the Super Bowl will be played on Feb. 6, could see an increase of up to $2 million in revenue if the Chicago Bears played the New York Jets in the National Football League's championship game, Eric Langan told Reuters. For that to happen, the Bears would have to beat the Green Bay Packers, and the Jets the Pittsburgh Steelers, in games on Sunday.

    "We estimate, worst case, it will be about an additional $1 million in revenue for us," he said in a telephone interview, adding the company did about that much extra during the Super Bowl in Miami last year.

    "But if we get a New York-Chicago Bears Super Bowl, then it could be really big," Langan added, citing the size of the cities. "We could be as high as $2 million."

    Houston-based Rick's, with annual revenue of $83 million, operates 22 clubs overall.

    "If the New York Jets are in the Super Bowl, you won't be able to park a private jet in this city," Langan said. "We're pretty excited. It's going to be a great Super Bowl either way."

    Rick's shares were up 8 cents or 0.9 percent near $8.69 in afternoon trading. (Reporting by Ben Klayman in Detroit, editing by Gerald E. McCormick)
    http://uk.reuters.com/article/idUKN21144…
  • minnow
    14 years ago
    Looks like Ricks and myself "bombed"- neither choice in Super Bowl, and 2 cities that are in are way down on mongers wish list.
    Well, if the groundhog can predict an early spring, then I'll take one last shot in this thread.

    FINAL ROUND SUPER BOWL#####################################

    GREEN BAY VS PITTSBURGH: Neither core city has many clubs. Portends a defensive struggle with field goals deciding the game. Pittsburgh gets more long distance help from Morgantown and Akron than Green Bay maybe gets from Lake Geneva.// STEELERS 9-6
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