Twas the night before Christmas...

Twas the night before Christmas When I did my dance His hard-on was stirring In his baggy pants.

My man is well-hung Fuzzy chest full of hair I told him “Don't touch,” And bent over his chair.

The children were nestled All snug in their beds While I stripped for their father His face turning red.

And daddy in his sweat pants And I in the buck Whispered dirty words About how we would fuck.

When out on the lawn There arose such a clatter His hard-on went soft While I saw what was the matter.

Naked at the window My neighbours I flashed (Normally I save it For men who have cash)

The moon on my breasts Made my stretch marks glow And started to dampen My arousal below.

When what to my Wondering eyes should appear, But a man with a miniature cock And some beer.

With a little erection He covered his dick I looked at his face It was my neighbour, Nick

More rapid than eagles, The guy quickly came. And he moaned and shouted and Called out my name.

As he glanced at my pussy He zipped up his fly Tripped over his beer And didn't say bye.

I turned back to dance With energy anew I was horny for my man And the small-dicked neighbour, too.

As I spread out a blanket To begin my floor show I thought about Nick But my man didn't know.

I imagined I danced for Both of the men And pretended Nick's dick Was bigger than a pen.

In my mind they Caressed my pussy and ass In my mind Nick wasn't A perv with no class.

As my man shed his clothes There were two in my mind One probing my pussy One in my behind.

My eyes, how they twinkled! My dimples how merry! My man probably wished He was poppin' my cherry.

But Nick has a cock The size of an elf's. And the truth made me laugh In spite of myself.

No longer horny I pretended to come So my man would hurry And we could be done.

He spoke not a word, But went straight to his work, And filled up the condom, Then pulled out with a jerk.

And laying the condom Aside on the bed He told me next time I should just give him head.

And then he remembered The noise from outside I wanted to sleep “Nothing happened,” I lied.

But I heard him exclaim As he swatted my rear “I wonder why Nick Didn't come with my beer.”