NBA Playoff Predictions: Based On Strength of Stripclubs In Home Team City

Based on SC's ??

Then how come Houston and Miami play for the championship every year ??

thanks for these predictions minnow I always enjoy reading them.

Using strip club data mining techniques to understand the strengths of regional contact and extras (regardless of culture, laws etc.) the Lakers will concede to Cleveland after two games.

Another way to compare the cities is based off the craigslist/backpage prostitute listings. Or reviews on the TER site

Question: "For Chicago to win this series they have to...." Answer from Charles Barkley: "Kill Lebron James..."

OK, 1st round "guesses" not the hottest, a Santa Claus .500 batting avg. at best: My, (drum roll) ROUND 2 "Predictions" based solely on strength of cities STRIPCLUBS:

1) CLEVELAND vs BOSTON: Cleveland has a solid, if not spectacular selection of clubs. Boston is a Siberia for good mileage stripclubs. Some long distance help from Providence portends Celts sinking some treys and jump shots, but fundemental difference in 2 primary cities not enough to overcome.// CAVS IN 6.

2) ORLANDO vs ATLANTA: Orlando is another Siberia in worthwhile clubs. Atlanta has some clubs in T100, but not exactly known for great mileage. Orlando getting long distance help from T100 clubs in Tampa AND Spacecoast area should be enough to squeak by.// MAGIC IN 7

3) LOS ANGELES vs UTAH: No contest here, both in sheer number of clubs and those worth visiting. Not to mention LA help from nearby COI. Can you say "sweep"?// LAKERS IN 4.

4) PHOENIX vs SAN ANTONIO: Phoenix has more clubs and more in T100. Mileage is (was- haven't been there in a while) a bit better in San Antonio, plus long distance help from Tucson and Austin, resp. should keep things interesting.// SUNS IN 6.

OK, Steve, your move. Please feel free to comment on stripclub strength estimates, or your club experiences in subject playoff cities..........

That's OK, minnow, I'm giving you five points for the first round. Thanks for doing this again!

Excellent analysis as always, minnow. We really need to get you a gig on ESPN. The "X-factor" this year may be the NBA needing a Kobe-LeBron finals to boost ratings. Look for some key calls to go LA/Cleveland's way down the stretch.

Thanks again for the analysis. Lebron James did suffer a minor injury from the Bulls series but he should be playing fine.

He also won his second straight MVP award by a landslide (The Cleveland Cavaliers star received 116 of a possible 123 first-place votes )
http://www.ajc.com/sports/lebron-james-w…

New York Strip Club Hopes To Score Points With LeBron James

When negotiating a free-agent contract, it's common practice to seek a no-trade clause, performance incentives and bonuses for a championship. In the case of LeBron James, another fringe benefit is being extended if he opts to go to the New York Knicks next season.

Scores, a "gentleman's club" in Manhattan that is hyped often by Howard Stern, is offering the following if LeBron joins Spike Lee's favorite team: A lifetime pass to receive free lap dances; a dedicated "LeBron James Day" where each girl will wear his jersey when stepping onto stage; a lifetime pass for complimentary dinners.

We expect to hear a counteroffer from one of Cleveland's flesh-oriented clubs shortly. And this certainly beats those lame bets made between mayors of competing cities.

http://content.usatoday.com/communities/…

Okay, Round 2 guesses turned out better, an "EZ Grade" 3/4??

Now for ROUND 3.............................

BOSTON vs ORLANDO: Neither city has the rep for good stripclubs. However, both cities "neighbor fans" are an entirely different story with Providence for Boston, and Tampa & Spacecoast areas for Orlando each having 5 clubs in top 100. Further examination shows the edge going to Orlando's neighbors for having all 5 clubs in Top 50 ( 2 in Top 10)vs only 1 Providence club in T50 ( ranked #25). Further tilting edge to Orlando would be several good reports on Pasco County clubs// MAGIC IN 6!

PHOENIX vs LOS ANGELES: Phoenix having 3 clubs in T100 vs 1 for "City of Angels" implies an edge on dunks, layups, and rebounding for Phoenix. However, greater L.A. Metro area and surrounding counties have 6 clubs in T100 while only 1 other AZ club is in T100 thus portending greater outside shooting and reserves stepping up their game giving the edge to the Lakers. As I have recent visits to both Phoenix and L.A. clubs, I can say that Phoenix has plenty of hot looking dancers, and that clubs aren't a wallet draining experience with most offering $10 LD's and $20 VIP's tops. However, its tough to beat COI mileage.// LAKERS IN 7!

Another "bump". (Does anyone really give a s#^t). 50% on Round 3, so on to>>>>>>>>> THE FINAL ROUND........................

BOSTON vs LOS ANGELES: Boston's clubs are amoung the most puritanical. Some "long distance help" from Providence portends good outside shooting/ trey sinking by the Celtics. But the sheer number of L.A. area clubs, coupled with COI/ Valley help is just too much. // LAKERS IN 5!

Sorry minnow; got caught up in stuff. I for one appreciate you doing this.

To catch up: 4 1/2 points for the second round, much better. I'll give you 1 1/2 points for the third.

Your analysis stripclub-wise is cogent. However, to be honest, I'll say the Celtics take it in 5!

I was only off by 2 games, lol. I've been away from L.A. clubs too long. I'm not a big baseball fan, but if enough posters are interested, I'll take a crack at the baseball playoffs. Marlins and Astros, anyone???

Yeah minnow I always enjoy these predictions based on strength of strip clubs in home city threads.

minnow,

I say you should do the entire football season. Of course this includes college AND pro. Perhaps the CFL, the AFL and maybe the Lingerie League.

Just wanted to bump this up and give you one final point for getting the Lakers right.

I still appreciate you doing this, even though I was late in sending you my appreciation. Hope to see you at least do this next year. And I'd be open for an MLB Playoffs thread too, although I don't think the Astros are going to be anywhere near playing for October. Thanks again!

I predicted Brazil would win the world cup because the women there are known for their nicely shaped ass ("Brazilian butt lift surgery", "Brazilian wax", etc.). However they lost to Netherlands, which I guess is even a better country because they have legal prostitution lol. My new pick to win the world cup is Netherlands.