I have decided to go undercover in the stripclub industry guys. No, im not gonna be a bartender or a bouncer, but a full-fledged strippa. Yeah, thats right. I'm gonna be channeling Dustin Hoffman from Tootsie in order to pull this one off. Why am i gonna do this? To give my tuscl brethren an insiders look at what really goes on behind the scenes. I will be dooing recon and gaining valuable, priceless intel from the dressing room, parties, etc...I'll find out what strippers really think of regulars, exactly how much lesbianism and drugs goes on in the clubs, what a stripper really needs to hear from a customer in order for him to score...the possibilities are endless. I haven't come up with a name or club yet but when i do I will report back. I have waxed my legs and back already(Ouch!!), and been practicing my pole tricks so I will have my stripper game down!!!!
Of course, along with your stripper name you'll need a believable "legend", or stripper back story. I wouldn't get too exotic, just keep it run of the mill. Something like: Abused Psychotic Stalked Druggie Bi-sexual Amateur Porn Star Ex-Cheerleader Stripper with Sleazy Boyfriend and Baby.
Too bad parodyman--> is gone. That used to be his shtick: Dress up like a female stripper so he could fool straight guys into accepting $10 blowjobs from him.
I have decided on the name tuscula...sort of a code name for anybody i meet who follows this board..maybe some of you could buy a dance or two from me to help out..
Oh Geez. I can almost hear what the late, lamented Corky would say:
"WOOF, WOOF, a bunch of angry frat boys threw my master the not-very-convincing-stipper aka drag queen into a well! WOOF! I think he broke a nail . . . and his leg . . . and a couple of ribs . . . WOOF! Send paramedics and a stylist WOOF!"
It's not a pretty picture. I fear that this expose will not turn out well.
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"WOOF, WOOF, a bunch of angry frat boys threw my master the not-very-convincing-stipper aka drag queen into a well! WOOF! I think he broke a nail . . . and his leg . . . and a couple of ribs . . . WOOF! Send paramedics and a stylist WOOF!"
It's not a pretty picture. I fear that this expose will not turn out well.