let her run the show

This may appeal more to newbies to the SC scene, but maybe there's something that others can learn. This is based off of general observation, experience, some fairly specific advice from a couple of dancers, and a dash or two from what I've learned on TUSCL.

Short version: I don't care if you've been going to SCs since the Coolidge administration and it's her first night dancing. Only one of you is the professional, and it ain't you, Sparky.

Now, granted, I realize that my nature is such that I tend to lean toward this perspective anyway. But there's a purely pragmatic aspect to it, too. Let me break this down into two categories: the floor dance (be it lap, table, floor, whatever) and the VIP.

FLOOR DANCE

Assuming the dancer is not trying to set a land-speed record, she generally will sit with you for a song or two once you've accepted having a dance from her. She'll at least wait for the start of the next song.

Unless it's obvious to me that I don't want to be with her for any length of time, I'll tell the dancer to wait until it's a song that she likes and/or likes to dance to. Different dancers dance well to different songs, plus there's the whole factor of the occasional DJ who wouldn't know a danceable song if it bit him in the ass.

If the dancer likes the song, 99 times out of 100, it will result in a better dance. How "better" comes out will vary. Sometimes it'll be a mileage increase; sometimes it'll just be more fun and enjoyable than usual.

Case in point on the "fun" end: There's a "no contact, either way" club here in Atlanta that I used to haunt now and then. The "table dances" are quite literally that - the dancer gets up on a table and dances. Obviously, mileage-wise, this sucks, but the eye candy is very good.

I was hanging with a fave on a slow night. There wasn't much point in her making the rounds, so we were just sitting and talking. I had already told her that I didn't have the scratch for VIP that night, but that I'd like 3-4 dances spread out over our time together. Basically she had carte blanche to hop up on the table when she heard a song that she really liked.

One song that she picked was a Sarah McLachlan song that I hadn't heard before. Now when I think Sarah McLachlan, I think "Arms of the Angels" and sad puppies on that pet adoption commercial. Well, that's what I used to think. Due to age and some medicines, it takes fairly specific contact for me to, er um, arrive. I almost, er um, arrived just watching her dance.

(Now I get a boner every time I pass the rescue shelter.   )

VIP

After a first VIP with one dancer, the dancer complimented me on being a gentleman, saying "Most guys are like 'this' as soon as we get back here" and mimed grabbing breasts rather savagely. Now I'm not advocating being a total wimp, but even if it's only a 15-minute VIP, you have time, dude. Chill.

Take some time to figure out what she likes. For most dancers, if she's happy, she's gonna try extra hard to make you happy. (Unless you accidentally give her such a big orgasm that she passes out in bliss.) And if she knows anything about what she's doing (and assuming your proclivities aren't too weird), she'll know exactly what to do to make you happy.

In short, feel her out before you feel her up.

That VIP that I referenced? First one with that dancer, having just met her that night and gotten one floor dance and 15 minutes of conversation before. End result in VIP? Free HJ completely initiated by her.

See, I told you it was pragmatic.