On Aging
Wednesday, October 14, 2020 8:05 PM
Apologies up front but I’m a bit manic today having just returned from Cartagena Colombia where I flew a sometimes GF in for a rendezvous. We had been separated for about 9 months by politics and Covid-19. It was an ordeal trying to make sure everything worked travel-wise (for both of us) but the window for having a valid PCR (Covid-19) test was a full 96 hours for entry into Colombia (which was still fucking tight) so Cartagena was the best option. It was a great break but now we’ve both returned to our respective prisons.
Anyways upon returning to the States, minus a lot of cum, I was greeted with the following message:
“It’s a boy.”
It wasn’t a surprise nor was it heart stopping as she had told me she was pregnant but the reality is honestly surreal and I don’t know how I feel. The child is not mine though maybe he should have been. You see the jubilant mother was my GF not so long ago even if it seems like another lifetime.
I’ll skip a lot of the details but at 28 she was less than half my age, cute as could be, college graduate and sky-rocketing up the management ladder in the resort industry. She was self confident and driven to achieve her goals. Never married, childless and bizarrely she was attracted to me. After so many decades of mongering I was cynical to say the least but after almost a year she had broken me down and convinced me that it was real, it would work and that we were meant to be.
I went to see her at her work but just as I was ready to ask the question her four year old nephew came running into the room. She was looking after him until her sister could come pick him up. Watching the two of them play brought me back to reality. The gleam in her eyes and huge grin on her face was something to melt your heart. I knew then that she was meant to be a mother and no fantasy on my part could replace the fact that at 59 years of age, I was too old. A May-December relationship between a man and woman may be one thing but it isn’t right to leave a child fatherless. For me that was non-negotiable and there was no work around. I explained, we cried and promised to remain friends though that part feels almost forced.
That was a little over two years ago and I still have second thoughts. I think I would have enjoyed raising a son but I know that would have been a selfish fantasy. And to deny her the opportunity of motherhood wasn’t something I could do to her.
I’ve prided myself on not being the delusional sort. That has served me well dealing with life, death and strippers. The body begins its natural decline around the age of 50 and it’s more than just some thinning or graying hair. So if you’re over fifty I hate to tell you this but you’re old and if you’re fucking women less than half your age then you are a dirty old man. Facts are facts so accept what is and don’t waste even a day of whatever life you have left. I wish a long and healthy life for each of you. Cheers.
Adjudicators
Want 4 weeks free VIP to tuscl?
Write an article
4 comments