My Wondrous Houdini Boxers
reverendhornibastard
Depraved Deacon of Degeneracy
This is the tale of my wondrous Houdini boxers and how they changed my life.
First, you must understand that during my early years as a strip club monger “table dances” were a new idea. There were no “lap dances” yet and “a good grind” back then referred to a good cup of coffee.
Just as the lap dance were becoming available, I happened to own a pit of silk boxers that I later began to refer to as my Houdini boxers.” Lap dances in the early days were not the same kind of grinding, dry-humping experience they have become in our modern age of enlightenment. They were more subtle and there was usually some daylight (or even a lot of daylight) between you and your dancer.
That didn’t mean the lap dances were not exhilarating. They were novel and a lap dance that would now be regarded as a total waste of time used to really get my motor running. My silk boxers were the most comfortable pair of boxers I owned at that time . They fit well and provided great comfort regardless of whether I was sitting behind my desk working like a dog or slouching, knees wide apart at a strip club watching a scantily clad young lady provocatively shaking her hips inches from my engorged kielbasa.
For reasons that I will probably never understand, Pink Floyd very often managed to escape from my Houdini boxers (and hence, their name). For whatever reason, when I sat in lap-dance mode, the pecker-vent seemed to open just a tad and, as Pink Floyd awoke, he very often seemed to just naturally emerge from my Houdini boxers.
As lap dances progressed from air-shows to the more delicious high-contact art from we have learned to love today, I couldn’t help but notice that Pink Floyd’s escape from his silken prison made him more accessible and placed him in a better position to enjoy his encounters with the delightful forces of the Pink Side.
It was at this point that I had my inspiration: Why not do away with the Houdini boxers all together and purposefully wear sheer, smooth trousers that would maximize tactile pleasures?
If a super-thin condom is better than a steel-belted redial condom, then surely sheer, soft pants would be preferable to overalls or heavy jeans when enjoying a lap dance at a strip club.
So the Houdini boxers were left behind and I acquired several pair of sheer, soft-fingered trousers that I could wear into strip clubs. Over time, I learned that dark colors were better as they more effectively concealed wet spots that may develop as a result of accidental or unexpected desplooginations.
Although I still remember my Houdini boxers, I don’t really miss them. I usually go commando if I plan to go to a strip club and usually wear suitable (i.e., sheer, smooth fibered trousers) that maximize comfort and tactile pleasures. I once had a pair of trousers that were so thin and soft, it was almost like going into the strip naked from the waist down.
As God is my witness, I wish I still had those trousers!
That said, I have never worn “sweat pants” to a strip club.
Houdini boxers and sheer, soft trousers are not as indispensable as they once were. Strip clubs, particularly those with VIP rooms, have evolved into dungeons of depravity so perverse, that even if you wear a suit of armor to the club, the girls will extricate your privates in order to exorcise your sticky demons.
Despite this new reality, I still prefer to wear comfortable, sheer, soft trousers that make me more accessible from the start.
First, you must understand that during my early years as a strip club monger “table dances” were a new idea. There were no “lap dances” yet and “a good grind” back then referred to a good cup of coffee.
Just as the lap dance were becoming available, I happened to own a pit of silk boxers that I later began to refer to as my Houdini boxers.” Lap dances in the early days were not the same kind of grinding, dry-humping experience they have become in our modern age of enlightenment. They were more subtle and there was usually some daylight (or even a lot of daylight) between you and your dancer.
That didn’t mean the lap dances were not exhilarating. They were novel and a lap dance that would now be regarded as a total waste of time used to really get my motor running. My silk boxers were the most comfortable pair of boxers I owned at that time . They fit well and provided great comfort regardless of whether I was sitting behind my desk working like a dog or slouching, knees wide apart at a strip club watching a scantily clad young lady provocatively shaking her hips inches from my engorged kielbasa.
For reasons that I will probably never understand, Pink Floyd very often managed to escape from my Houdini boxers (and hence, their name). For whatever reason, when I sat in lap-dance mode, the pecker-vent seemed to open just a tad and, as Pink Floyd awoke, he very often seemed to just naturally emerge from my Houdini boxers.
As lap dances progressed from air-shows to the more delicious high-contact art from we have learned to love today, I couldn’t help but notice that Pink Floyd’s escape from his silken prison made him more accessible and placed him in a better position to enjoy his encounters with the delightful forces of the Pink Side.
It was at this point that I had my inspiration: Why not do away with the Houdini boxers all together and purposefully wear sheer, smooth trousers that would maximize tactile pleasures?
If a super-thin condom is better than a steel-belted redial condom, then surely sheer, soft pants would be preferable to overalls or heavy jeans when enjoying a lap dance at a strip club.
So the Houdini boxers were left behind and I acquired several pair of sheer, soft-fingered trousers that I could wear into strip clubs. Over time, I learned that dark colors were better as they more effectively concealed wet spots that may develop as a result of accidental or unexpected desplooginations.
Although I still remember my Houdini boxers, I don’t really miss them. I usually go commando if I plan to go to a strip club and usually wear suitable (i.e., sheer, smooth fibered trousers) that maximize comfort and tactile pleasures. I once had a pair of trousers that were so thin and soft, it was almost like going into the strip naked from the waist down.
As God is my witness, I wish I still had those trousers!
That said, I have never worn “sweat pants” to a strip club.
Houdini boxers and sheer, soft trousers are not as indispensable as they once were. Strip clubs, particularly those with VIP rooms, have evolved into dungeons of depravity so perverse, that even if you wear a suit of armor to the club, the girls will extricate your privates in order to exorcise your sticky demons.
Despite this new reality, I still prefer to wear comfortable, sheer, soft trousers that make me more accessible from the start.
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2 comments
w.r.t. getting dances - early-on in my SC-career, it would often be uncomfortable having to manage a raging hard-on it getting tangled with the underwear - back then I used to wear Khaki pants and after a couple of years of SCing ditched the underwear b/c they were too-uncomfortable, but still found wearing Khakis a bit uncomfortable and the zipper could be a problem w/ an aggressive grinder given what position you were getting the dances (seemed more of an issue if I was getting them on a low-chair or sofa, vs a high-chair/barstool).
Circa 2005, I was at a dive club in Dallas (a small Deja Vu next to the old Baby Dolls Dallas location) - I noticed a dude wearing sweatpants - my initial reaction was "wow, what a perv, the nerve of that guy" - but he seemed totally comfortable w/ it and it did not seem to interfere w/ his strip-clubbing at all - although I was kinda taken aback it put sweatpants on my radar and a few-months later I decided to try it and bought some dark sweats that had pockets and kinda looked like slacks at distance - I def enjoyed how comfortable they felt just to wear, and for getting dances - not only were they smooth and soft, but strectchy to where my erection had more room to comfortably roam - decided that is how I enjoyed my SCing the most since I was the type to get lots of dances from various dancers, vs doing VIP with a single-dancer, and getting dances w/ soft strectchy/roomy sweats def felt better and I felt I got more of my money's worth.
I lived in Dallas in the 2000s which is where I became a strip-club aficionado - in late 2009 moved back-home to Miami, FL - didn't club much till mid-2011 - joined TUSCL early-2012 and became active on the TUSCL discussion-board and that is when I heard about guys purposely wearing shorts to the strip-club - it was kinda a foreign-concept to me but tried it at some point and liked the convenience and comfort of wearing shorts - I wear dark-colored athletic shorts for the same-reasons I wore sweatpants; smooth and strectchy so my erection has room to comfortably roam - the leg-section of the shorts is wide so the happy-stick can easily/comfortably come-out if the situation arises, or for a handsy dancer that wants to do some exploring - I also find the elastic waistband of sweatpants or athletic-shorts very comfortable and when I SC it's to have a good-time and I have a better-time when I'm comfortable vs wearing something that is not as comfortable.
Strip-clubbing, and particularly getting grinding 2-way-contact dances, is a contact-sport so for me it's best to wear clothing that aids, rather than constricts/hinders, the task at hand - I find strectchy fabric, that's loose and smooth, and w/ elastic wasteband, the most comfortable and enjoyable for getting contact-dances and it doesn't feel-the-same/as-comfortable when I get dances wearing something else (always enjoy them less when not wearing my go-to SC gear) - I usually try to get them in dark-color b/c in part it seems to standout less particularly in a dark-club, and in the case of sweatpants (or lounge pants which I now use over sweats), I usually get them in black w/ pockets and they don't seem to standout as much (at least in my eyes), and to my knowledge, the way I dressed has never been a detriment to me getting what I want in a strip-club and I get what I want while being more-comfortable.
Many guys seem to think wearing sweats or athletic shorts to a strip-club is somewhat embarrassing or inappropriate - I was one of those guys in my early PL-career - but the way I see it, how inappropriate is it to wear sweats or shorts when one is paying for blowjobs and sex from a woman they don't know - I think for many guys it has a lot to do w/ worrying/caring how people will see-them/judge-them - and as far as I'm concerned pretty-much no one should be judging anyone in a strip-club - dudes are paying $$$ to ogle at naked-women and/or grope them, or paying for sex - and the women walk-around almost completely naked and sell their bodies for ogling, groping, and more - yet in the eyes of many wearing sweats or shorts is somehow "sketchy" (doesn't make sense in reality, it's just about perception and worrying what others think) - but in the end, one will do what one is comfortable with - for me it's about my interaction with a dancer - and I feel what I wanna do with a dancer I can do more-comfortably/enjoyably if I wear something closer to what I would wear in bed w/ a woman vs what I would wear to the office - if I went to the club just to hangout and tip on stage, or exclusively for VIP, then comfortable/practical attire is probably not as important to me as if I go to get lots of 2-way-contact dances.
I also tend to hit mostly dive clubs and most of my visits these days is in the late-afternoons - when I visit a higher-end club, particularly at night, I will usually wear my black lounge-pants w/ pockets which standout less than my athletic-shorts.