(Bo)-ringing in the new year

Dear Night Shift,

I want to like you. I really do. You're the nicest club in my rotation in terms of cleanliness and modern decor. You have huge TVs. A spinning pole. No tip walk! Your staff is always attentive and polite. You are open during the day, which is a big bonus for old guys like me. Parking is easy. Security is chill.

But you've stopped being a fun time. You've stopped delivering on the strip club anticipation and excitement. There are too few offerings. In fact (I'm just going to say it) you're out and out boring. And expensive, too, for a tightly-policed experience. (200/15, 350/30). Not that there is anything to buy. You're more of a restaurant than a strip club at this point.