sinclair's Review

I was in Samuel Clemen's hometown and saw TUSCL had a listing for a club called Ole Milt's. I stopped by on a Friday night at 22:45. Parking is on the street. The entire block of Main Street this bar is located on is abandoned storefronts and the abandoned Star Theater. The only sign of life is the Mark Twain Hotel across the street. There was a $3 cover charge at the door. You are given a wristband for in and out privileges as there is no smoking allowed inside. There were always a lot of people loitering outside the front door. The inside of the building is four times as long as it is wide. You walk past a pool table in the front. The bar is on the right side in the back. The only stage is in the back left corner. It is about four feet off the ground with a spinning pole in the middle. A wooden tip rail prevents you from getting within three feet of the entertainer. Thus there is no stage contact and tipping is pretty pointless. The restrooms are in the far back of the room and can only fit one pisser at a time.

The bar was manned by two guys who had ponytails and rotted out teeth. Sincweisers were a very reasonable $3. Jager Bombs were $6. Sweet Titty Bombs were $6. The only foods served are bar pizzas for $13 and hot wings for $13. Packs of Marlboros are $7, while Newports are $9. Milt's clientele was half African-Americans and half white folks that looked like they could have been extras in Deliverance. There were a fair amount of civilian women and couples; I don't think there is much nightlife in Hannibal for young folks. Ole Milt's is cash only; credit cards are not accepted here. The ATM has a maximum withdrawal of $200 per transaction and a $5 fee. The music is played off of a TouchTunes jukebox and picked by the customers. All of the music was hip hop while I was there.

There was only one dancer working on Friday night. She looked to be about 4'11", chunky, and close to 40 years old would be my guess. She had hair shorter than a lot of guys and lots of tattoos, including a small one on the side of her face. On stage she did not take anything off. She had to keep her top and bottom on, which makes sense because Missouri is one of the strictest localities for adult entertainment in the country. Personally, I would not classify Ole Milt's as a strip club, but rather a go-go bar. There are no private dances, but it looked like you could get some sort of table dance for $20. I found the dancer to be nasty, but some of the black guys were going hog-wild over her.