discussion comment
5 days ago
@ClubFan
I expected all sorts of different replies and I appreciate them all. I just needed to hear different point of views as all my friends in real life know next to nothing about strip clubs.
discussion comment
5 days ago
@Rick
True. Lol.
discussion comment
5 days ago
@TCabot
Yep, definitely heard that line before but always good to hear again.
This was definitely not meant to be a “does this stripper really like me” thread. I know its all business for her. But more of a:
Should I fight these feelings to keep a good thing going ITC or is it too late and make a clean break?
Ultimately I know there is no magic answer, but its nice to hear more experienced club goers take on it so I appreciate everyone who took the time to read and reply.
discussion comment
6 days ago
@jaybud
Everyone has been great. Trying to snap out of it for sure. May need some time off or time with another girl at the club. Or time with some non strippers.
discussion comment
7 days ago
Thank you so much for the replies guys!
A couple thoughts:
@Rightfield
You are 100% right in me overthinking things. I tend to do this in many things in life which is not always a good thing. I wish I could just occasionally go in to see her, have a good time and then head home without a second thought. This is how it used to be until a little more recently.
As for your read on her, it makes so much sense. She very much has the “in the moment” vibe to her. Shes enjoying me as one of her more likeable customers and letting her emotions just play out without any additional thought to any of it. Just a guy to enjoy while shes at work.
Viewing things through this lens should help me check my feelings and just enjoy a good thing ITC while it lasts I hope.
discussion comment
7 days ago
Sounds like a good approach that I will try to adopt. Just need to shake the feelings for this one.
discussion comment
7 days ago
@jackslash
Maybe she does have a boyfriend. Who knows? Honestly, if I found out she did, it might make things clearer for me. Then I could either be content with ITC experiences and nothing else, or just move onto other dancers if the bf ruined the experience for me.
discussion comment
7 days ago
@ClubFan
I would love to try and go for some OTC. If she is not down for that, do you think it would ruin anything we have ITC? Approaching OTC is new to me, I should probably read up on here.
discussion comment
7 days ago
I would say that the majority of my doubts/concerns are mainly related to fear of rejection. No real concerns with compatibility with her, although its too early to tell as I have only interacted with her in the club and a little texting.
In spite of my brain recognition of dance/customer relationships rarely turning into something more, I definitely think I am at the point of wanting more.
As far as the texting, I don't think she was looking for OTC. I feel like the time we have spent together talking about a ton of activities we both enjoy, there would have been some point where OTC would be hinted at. My theory is she was texting me a lot as she saw me as a potential fun, non-creepy regular that she would rather have as a customer than some other PLs. I think she knows she has me pretty hooked now. Probably doesn't feel the need to maintain the texting relationship as closely. She still texts, just often times its inconsistent. It will be in bursts and then there would be days between replies.
discussion comment
7 days ago
@ClubFan81077
Thanks for the reply.
1. The question of wanting something more with her is something I would try not to think about. I am not sure if it was a defense mechanism in my brain to not think about this question or what. However, if she asked me out on a date tomorrow I know I would say yes. So i guess the answer is yes, I would want something more but I have kind of accepted that it is probably highly unlikely to happen.
2. I am a single 37 year old with no kids and a decent job. All I know about her is she is 27, so ten years younger. She has mentioned she is single and hasn't had a boyfriend for a few years but I don't know how much of that is part of her stripper lines. While she isn't the hottest one in the club, she is definitely more attractive than the type of girls I usually pull outside of the club. Most would probably say she is "out of my league" physically. I sort of doubt she has any interest in me being anything more than maybe her favorite customer. This is because I feel like if she had any interest beyond that she would be texting me more on her days off as girls do when they have interest in someone. She used to do this more often but recently it has stopped, so I highly doubt its is anything more at this point.
3. This brings the ultimate question: can I be happy with just a dancer/customer relationship. I guess the answer to that is "I don't know". If you asked me this a month ago I would have said "almost certainly", but here I am making this post, longing for her to text me and counting the hours until she works again and I can go see her, so that doesn't seem like a good sign.
In the original post I posed the question of if I should just keep enjoying the ITC experiences while they last or to cut her off due to myself wanting more, but the more lay it out the ultimate question just becomes: can my feelings handle being nothing more than a customer?
That's what I need to answer soon.