Slight Off Topic: NBA Playoff Predictions Based On City Stripclub Merits

...(cont) 1st Round West

LAKERS VS JAZZ: Hmm, lemme see- a bucketload of clubs, plus COI stalwarts vs a few no contact clubs ??? Can anyone say "sweep"?// L.A. LAKERS IN 4.

NUGGETS VS HORNETS: Neither city is really tops, but Denver has 1 club (Cheerleaders, Centerfolds, something like that in upper echelon T100 list// DENVER NUGGETS IN 6

SPURS VS MAVERICKS: The battle of 2 TX cities with good clubs and attractive babes. Thing is, Dallas area has more of 'em, and they're higher rated.// DALLAS MAVERICKS IN 6

TRAILBLAZERS VS ROCKETS: Both Portland & Houston have a lot of clubs, but Houston has more sizeable clubs (Portland clubs mostly small taverns that happen to have a few nude dancers). Some LE trouble with Houston clubs portends Rockets getting into foul trouble, but the strength & depth of Houston clubs (T100 list) should carry the day// HOUSTON ROCKETS IN 6

minnow, you really need to get a life. But if you really like watching tall guys dunking, then you should visit my favorite club. They have flat screen TV's just above the urinals so you don't miss a minute. lol...

Well, minnow, I for one think you're doing a great job and look forward to seeing this every year. It's nice to know there's a guy on TUSCL who's into sports, too.

s-cat- Are you angling for a retirement job as a bathroom troll??
syg- Well, not perfect, but all in fun.
T_B- If lap dancing becomes an Olympic Event, I'm sure you'll be Chief Judge.

O-o-o-o-o-kay, ROUND TWO, Tongue in cheek predictions.

CAVALIERS VS HAWKS: Cleveland has 1 club in Top 40, so does Atlanta. Atlanta has more clubs, but Cleveland has the edge in contact. Look for Cleveland to have the edge in rebounding & steals, Atlanta to make some nice shots. In this close series, contact will carry the day.// CLEVELAND CAVALIERS IN 7.

CELTICS VS MAGIC : Both Orlando & Boston are weak contact stripclub cities. Both have very strong "sister cities" (Tampa, Providence). However, Tampa is stronger with #3 rated Mons Venus, & # 31 rated S-YS.// ORLANDO MAGIC IN 7

LAKERS VS ROCKETS: Both cities/metro areas have strong clubs, with Houston Treasures(20) & St. James (59) being most stellar for them. No downtown LA clubs made T100, but got plenty of long distance help with COI stalwarts, and a some top OC clubs. This portends LA sinking several key "treys". This, coupled with Houston getting into foul trouble (some area club LE problems), gives the edge to....// LA LAKERS IN 6.

NUGGETS VS MAVERICKS: Denver has 3 clubs in T100, so does Dallas. The later are more highly rated (22,25,44) vs (24, 74, 76). Dallas city/metro area has more clubs than Denver city/metro, and higher contact levels to boot.// DALLAS MAVERICKS IN 6.

minnow, Yeah. I am just waiting for the old guy in the walker at the Goldrush to kick off. lol...or maybe I'll become a male stripper.

minnow, by my calculations I'm going to give you 6 1/2 points for your first round. You did a lot better with the West than the East. Good luck next round!

syg- Looks like I did better in the East this time- how many points to I get now................

Moving on to "TIC"// ROUND THREE

CAVALIERS VS MAGIC: City vs City, clubwise, Cleveland wins hands down over Orlando. But, 1-2 hrs. driving time outside both cities is entirely different. Yes, Orlando gets some awesome long distance help from Tampa, and Cleveland gets, what??? However, some Tampa hoops fans are Miami Heat fans, which dilutes long distance help for the Magic. Still, the awesomeness of Tampa will push this to a 7-game series, but, in the end the merits of the primary city clubs, coupled with the dilution of long distance fan base results in// CLEVELAND CAVALIERS IN 7.

LAKERS VS NUGGETS: Both cities have clubs in the Tuscl Top 100. However, the sheer number of L.A. Metro area clubs coupled with higher contact levels imply L.A. edge in rebounding, inside game, and bench output.// L.A. LAKERS IN 6.

I think Cleveland gets the long distance help from Columbus, Detroit, and Indianapolis.
Go Cavs!

ss1- I should elaborate that I consider "long distance help" to be:
1) A reasonably close NON- NBA City.
2) "Reasonably close" I'd peg at 1-2 hrs driving time.

Detroit & Indy not considered long distance help. Besides being beyond the 2 hr driving range, both respective cities already have NBA team. I don't think a Pacer or Pistons fan would have a charitable disposition towards the Cavs.
Columbus arguably slides in under the 2 hr driving window, and rounds out Cleveland clubs somewhat, but they simply don't measure up to Tampa offerings, imo.

minnow, you get four points, an average of a point per series. Nailing Orlando makes up for missing Dallas. Way to go!

minnow, you totally missed the East but you totally nailed the West -- two points, 12 1/2 points total! So, how about the Finals?

both Orlando and LA have no clubs in the top 100 so this will be an interesting match-up. LA has 25 clubs and Orlando has not even half of that. So the only thing that could save Orlando is the long distance help from Tampa. Also surprising to find out that CA has no clubs in the top 30.

I vaguely recall Orlando being an airdance paradise. I have no idea what LA clubs are like, but since LA gets help from CoT and a couple other places nearby, I've got to go with LA.
I'd go with LA for real, anyway. David Stern must be disappointed Cleveland and LeBron James missed out.

You are not the only one who heard that about Orlando. I remember reading something about that but I do not know the source. I want to say there is a law that forbids even one way contact during lap dances but I do not have a source so I did not include that in my original post.

As one that remembers Orlando from many years ago, and now, there is no comparison.

Orlando is lame-o-rama for clubs.
However, if one were trying to pick who might win the basketball championship, it would be tough to bet against the Magic. They seem surprisingly capable...

just wondering did the lakers and magic play each other in the regular season? That is a good way to predict who will win. (i.e. the magic played the cavs in regular season and dominated them)

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I'll let syg be my scorekeeper, thanks for some initial research by samsung. I haven't been to any Orlando clubs in over 10 yrs. I have been to several L.A. area clubs, all reports indicate there's NFW I'd get in Orlando what I got in tamest L.A. club. So, city-wise, L.A. wins hands down. While L.A. has 25 clubs, there's a crapload of clubs within 1 hr drive(non-rush hr) of Staples Center, or LAX, and another crapload within 2 hrs. L.A. metro area gets only 3 clubs in T100, with best being #36. Orlando, otoh, gets some awesome long distance help from Tampa with 3 T100 clubs (best being #2 rated Monz), and 1 from Cocoa Beach(Inner Room) in T100. Arguably, fans from both areas could be Miami Heat fans, so I'm not giving full weighting to this factor.

LAKERS vs MAGIC: The awesome long distance (even if somewhat dilluted by Heat fan population) help from Tampa portends Magic edge in 3 pointers. But in the end, that won't be enough to overcome basic L.A. edge in the home city clubs, coupled with sheer number of bordering clubs, especially COI clubs. I'm sure we all can name some clubs not in T100 that we had a good time at, I can name several in LA area in past few yrs.// LOS ANGELES LAKERS IN 6.

samsung1, for the record, Orlando beat the Lakers both times they met in the regular season.

Thanks for teh prediction minnow, and the rest of y'all!

LA in one. Orlando is a pit.