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Bundling a Bottle with VIP

Nov 16, 2025, 4:08 PM
Avatar for Manuellabore
Manuellabore
vip member

Newbies are often asking questions about basic stuff like whether, when and how to pursue OTC, how to suss out availability of extras, etc. Going to offer this solid piece of unasked-for advice. When you're going to go VIP and you're told a bottle (usually a split of champagne) is included, leave that place immediately. It's a hallmark of a ripoff joint. They'll often imply that the bottle is mandatory when it's really just a ridiculously overpriced add on to what is going to be an overpriced and lame VIP.

Often, there is a third-party employee, usually an attractive former dancer, who will sit down with you and the dancer (like somebody selling timeshares to retired couples) to make the pitch for the most expensive options possible, and try to make you look like a cheapskate if you don't take the plunge.

Not only should you leave the place immediately if you encounter these ploys, but you should return shortly before daybreak, when the building is empty, pour 5 gallons of kerosene around the perimeter, and burn the place to the ground. Then, bring in a front end loader, load the remaining debris into a Spacex capsule, and obliterate the debris in suborbital space

comments (4)

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Avatar for gSteph
gSteph

Hope the 3rd paragraph is satire.

Avatar for ilbbaicnl
ilbbaicnl

+1

Avatar for georgmicrodong
georgmicrodong

Agreed. All of it.

Avatar for misterorange
misterorange

Yeah, but what kind of pants are the best for LDs?

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