I had an experience recently that made me think more deeply about the unspoken expectations that can develop between dancers and regular customers.
There's a dancer I regularly spend time with — I usually get dances from her and often buy her drinks. On this particular night, I bought her two $18 drinks and got three VIP dances with her, so I thought everything was cool.
Later that night, I decided to get dances from another dancer that caught my eye that I saw earlier . As I was sitting with the new dancer she walks to my side and ask if I can pay her tip out for her. I have done this for her in the past but on tonight I told her that I couldn’t. She ended up getting upset with me, which caught me off guard as she text me saying that if I chose to get dances with this new girl that she was never going to dance for me again lol. Very childish imo. From my perspective, I felt like I had supported her that night and was just choosing to engage with someone else for a bit of variety — something I thought was normal in this setting.
But her reaction made me realize that maybe there were different expectations I hadn’t considered. Maybe she saw me as "her" regular, or maybe she expected a tip out regardless because of the ongoing connection we’ve built. It made me wonder: what are the unspoken rules in these kinds of relationships? As a customer, am I expected to maintain some level of exclusivity or financial consistency if I’ve been regularly seeing one dancer?
I’ve always tried to be respectful and supportive, and I do understand this is their livelihood. At the same time, I think it’s important for both sides to communicate expectations clearly to avoid misunderstandings like this.
Curious to hear other perspectives on how dancer-customer relationships evolve and what’s considered fair or expected in situations like this.
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