Mile Marker 5,073

avatar for sinclair
sinclair
Strip Club Nation
I took a look at the last five strip club reviews I wrote. I went from Kansas to Maine to Rhode Island to Montana to Oregon. There was an average distance of 1,268 miles traveled on each segment of the journey. That is a lot of miles between itches.

As the summer dies and another winter is born, there is more sand in the bottom of the hour glass than in the top, and I get reflective. I got to thinking how many nights I have stayed in hotel rooms since working full-time. I estimate about two thousand or so. I have been pulled over by the authorities three times: twice in Kansas and once in Nebraska. Both Jayhawks had pity for the nomad and only gave warnings. The Cornhusker dealt me a hefty speeding ticket. Then, I was thinking about how many Sincweisers I have drank in that span. Maybe eight thousand. When I am at home, I almost never consume alcohol. When I am on the road or at gentlemen's clubs, I more or less binge drink. It helps you fall asleep quicker in a bed that is not your own. It lubricates conversation with complete strangers. It is sanative for loneliness and white line fever.

Here today, gone tomorrow. All these dancers fill my sorrow. 🦕

10 comments

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avatar for Lex Luthor
Lex Luthor
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2 months ago
Sounds like it may be time to write a country song based on your thoughts of loneliness and sorrow. Sell it to a top artist, make millions, then ride off into the sunset.
avatar for Beantowner
Beantowner
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2 months ago
Only being pulled over 3 times in that amount of time? Impressive. Hats off to a well seasoned strip club adventurer
avatar for loper
loper
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2 months ago
Good idea Lex. Let's see some rough lyrics in your next post, Sinclair!
avatar for sinclair
sinclair
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2 months ago
There is another reminiscence I should have included in the original post while talking about a career on the road: One day I was a hero. A speeding car blew out a tire on the interstate, and then lost control and drove head-on into a light pole. The vehicle caught on fire. I was nearby in a hotel parking lot getting ready to head over to the work site. I jumped the chain-link fence onto Interstate 40. I spat on my bandanna, tied it over my mouth and pulled the driver out of the burning car, while a Mexican guy pulled a teenager out of the front passenger seat. The car ignited fast and there was thick smoke everywhere. We dragged the car crash victims up the shoulder to safety and an ambulance arrived in short order. The sad part was the twenty onlookers who stopped only to photograph and/or post the accident on social media. I didn’t talk to the authorities and left in short order because I was going to be late for work.

The next day, I read a blurb in the local newspaper about the car wreck. One of the occupants was in critical condition at the local hospital. Interviewed eyewitnesses described a green brontosaurus running onto Interstate 40 and moments later emerging from the billowing smoke with the driver of the car. No one knew who he was or had a chance to speak to him as he had disappeared from the scene almost as quickly as he appeared.
avatar for Muddy
Muddy
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2 months ago
Good write up, Sinclair. Yeah man I’m having a blast with this hobby, no burnout at all yet. I’ll stop doing it when it stops being fun. I’d guess since I made my tuscl account it’s about 300K miles driven on my two cars I’ve had in that span (not all for strip clubs but most of it is from these long adventures, 90% highway miles) plus rental cars mileage which I really drive the shit out of. Probably over 50K on those. So I’m coming up on 400k miles during the last 7 or 8 years. It’s been a blast man, meeting all kinds of crazy people, seeing wild stuff and just making a lot of great memories. And it’s great that we have a place we can come back to to shoot the shit and share all our adventures.
avatar for gammanu95
gammanu95
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2 months ago
First, I would like to recognize sinclair for his selflessness in rescuing the driver from the car and leaving without bravado. I assume if it were big-titted apple-bottom babe you would have at least stuck around for a phone number?

Business travel, and by extension solo male travelers, may be the anchor customers for so many strip clubs. Safe neighborhoods in good school districts with healthy property values rarely exist around great strip clubs. When they do, many of us are hesitant to go for fear of being found out. Business travel provides means, motive, and opportunity for some great strip club exploring.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
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2 months ago
I am amazed at being pulled over only 3 times in that span. Thats pretty close to my yearly average over the past 50 years.
avatar for captainfun
captainfun
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2 months ago
I’ve only been pulled over once in all my clubbing days. About 20 years ago. Pre-GPS. Driving in an unfamiliar residential area trying to make my way back to a main road in the Kansas City area on a work trip. Open pizza box on passenger side of the vehicle. Rental car with plates from some other state.

Cop chose to let me move along. Guessing he didn’t want to deal with paperwork of someone licensed in one state, car registered in another and owned by a rental car company. I got very lucky.
avatar for papides
papides
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2 months ago
Nice poetry. And nice heroism.

... Also on the psychological level. It might be worth pointing out there's a difference between loneliness and neediness. Meaning we are social animals and everyone gets the sensation of being lonely. But it only becomes an unpleasant or "unbearable" (alcohol inducing situation) when you don't have YOURSELF on your side. That's when you're truly lonely because then you're bereft of your inner self and inner resources. The solution to this is, of course, to learn to lean on your own inner motivations and act from them (rather than suppose and deny them). It's why people say life is adventure ... That is the adventure/journey of getting to find out who you are. Cheers brontosaurus man.
avatar for papides
papides
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2 months ago
Rather than suppress** ( that may have been a phone typo rather than a parapraxis)
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