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The dugan’s wisest words yet

rickthelion

Straight outta tha NC, comin' atcha with an AK ready to steal your daughter. ROAR!!!

My brother from another mother recently said “When I go to an amusement park, do I keep things professional and all business? Of course not. Sure it's business for the people working there, but it's all shits and giggles for me.”

Truer words have not been spoken. Or written. Or sent via telegram or whatever the fuck. The point is that my brother shared some Einstein level brilliance there.

Indeed, i want all of you hairless apes to know that if this rick shows up on your porch it is all because he want to have some shits and giggles. Let me fuck your wife. Assuming she’s a hottie of course. She’ll thank you and you’ll know that you have been kind to a rick. And kindness to ricks is its own reward. And if I appear to be having sex with some of your furniture or a lamp or something that is just because this here lion is a lil’ too drunk. Lemme sleep it off won’t ya? Promise I’ll wake up early all refreshed and shit and make you a nice omelette. Maybe even pour some mimosas. Trust me, you’ll enjoy. ROAR!!!