To Mind My Own Business or Not . . .
I visited Angels this afternoon and had a fantastic time. (Yes, worse than a 98 pound weakling I bought dances from a long time dancer that I shouldn't have. I'm 100% to blame.)Anyway, I see an apparently nice guy rookie getting some dances and having a blast. The dancer really did an outstanding job. The problem is the dancer is from the prisons and rightfully, imo, feels society owes her a debt. Her means of collecting the debt that society owes her is by at the very least theft and probably a lot more. :)
Before she even started her first dance I was fairly certain (I learned "mind reading" from parodyman ;) ) she would overcount a couple songs. She does 3 or 4 dances and they were hot so he didn't get ripped in that respect. He practically has a heart attack when she tells him 6 songs. So he starts to give her $30 while objecting that a most it was 4 dances (depends on when she started counting, but it was 3 or 4) . . . oh no, she's got an easy mark as she is going to milk him. She coldly says $60. He reminds her that the dances are $5. She says on no those were "lap dances." She never even sat down on him once during the dance--they were clearly table dances and it isn't normal to charge for laps anyway. He starts to object and she says $60 and if you couldn't afford the dances you should have thought about that first. He shakes his head in defeat and pays her the $60.
Rightly or wrongly, I didn't "mind my own business." That may have been stupid or even immoral depending on one's perspective. Except for a little response that I made to FONDL earlier in the day, I almost certainly wouldn't haven't gotten involved. I would have "minded my own business" and not given a damn about a "rookie" customer who appeared to be very nice (and was). Society most likely owes the dancer a HUGE debt, imo, given how corrupt the court system and laws are. Anyway, I waved the manager over. Explained the situation and he immediately took action and returned the customer's money--$30 and bought him a beer, he had told the manager $30 would be right and that she did an excellent job.
There is a reasonable chance I may not have heard the end of this and I have no one to blame, but myself. I didn't need to stick my nose in her business. I *assume* most people will think calling the dancer to floor via the manager was the right choice. I wouldn't mind my *assumption* being wrong. :)
So do you "mind your own business" or not? Any shades of gray or is this an obvious bright line right and wrong issue for you?
Later I chatted with the customer some more and he said he was willing to take the loss because after all a single dance not even as good or long is $25 at Tootsies. He says yes, he got taken but in a place like this you really can't get taken. The dancer was hot. She did a great job. The prices are dirt cheap. But, he added that he expected more from her (morally) and before getting ripped off was thinking about coming back to spend a lot more money on her. He said I'm going to try and stay away for at least 6 months, but I'm addicted. I told him that I was addicted to the dancers as well.
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No, he thanked me a few times and was very happy though still "recovering" i.e. that rip-off came from left field. I *may* have saved other guys from rip-offs at that club from that *one* dancer. (Heck, I even still get ripped off "small" amounts sometimes--but, I think that I'm to blame for not being "stronger" or whatever.) In a $5 club it is a little bit of the Wild West like the customer pointed out so who knows what will happen next.
The final chapter or chapters still haven't been written. I don't want to see her go and I doubt the manager or other dancers want to see her go. Having said that payback against me is not out of the question. She may "fight back" without warning at who knows what future date. She may see me as a horrible person and part of the system.
Perhaps worse it may just transfer and or increase the problem else where and to someone else. She has a chip on her shoulder that for me at least was very easy to see. The "rookie" didn't see it even a little bit.
If I had perceived the customer in a negative light, then I most likely wouldn't have done anything. Of course, she might not have tried anything and if she did she could be in for a rude awakening depending on what type of negative the customer is.
Most of her problems may have been self-induced depending on how you look at that and what the facts of the case are. Her personality is to "fight back." There is that old tangle web we weave story, which sometimes works out in reality. The very good message being don't take the wrong road even if at first it doesn't seem so bad because one thing can lead to another to another to something really terrible.
It can work in *positive* reverse too. :) A person can do a good deed for me and then I will remember that and not only return the favor if possible, but be more willing to care and help other people.
It also works in *negative* reverse. :( I get screwed by the courts, then I become very negative and distrustful. If someone needs my help that involves stopping a real crime (for example a van is being ripped-off in front of the owner), then I may figure gee it wouldn't take too much for me to stand up to the theif. In fact, that would be my knee jerk reaction. Try and stop the crime and help the victim. That poor victim may not be able to afford the loss of his van that is being stolen right in front of his eyes. The police aren't going to arrive in time most likely and the victim isn't in a position to do anything. Oops, there is a real complication at least in my mind. The system is extremely bad, ime, and getting involved not only brings risk to me (if the risk was just from the criminal that isn't going to slow me down in that one case even a little) from the system (yes, you definitely place yourself at risk even just being a good samaritan and returning a purse LOL!), but *far worse is the risk to the criminal.* Sounds twisted doesn't it? And, it should. :) After all the criminal choose his lot by stealing a van that didn't belong to him. He deserves whatever punishment is dealt out by the courts. Does he? Whatever punishment? even if it included chopping his hands off or perhaps 20 years in prison? Some people would easily say YES!!! To those people not only wouldn't I want to stop the theif, but heck I'd be rooting for him! :)
Anyway, it appeared that the victim lost his van. Who knows how much it really hurt him if in fact he ultimately lost the van. There could have been a child left in the van for god's sakes!!! :( Who knows and besides "I should mind my own business" "don't burden others." The victim sure as hell will never know that it all could turned out *probably* much more positively at least for him. The van and its contents would most likely have been immediately back in his possession. Of course, you never know how willing a criminal is to fight back, but he appeared scared to death----just of the owner! LOL! :)
Anyway, do I feel bad about that? Yes. Would I do things differently if I had another chance? No. In the future will I come to the rescue if capable? To save someone's property HELL NO if it will lead to contact with the system and that might be the correct course of action even if the system was wonderful. The old let the police handle it. :)
I think it's best to stay out of other people's business unless they ask you to get involved. Especially in a strip club, where I would hope that a busybody can't tell everything that has taken place as well as the participants themselves. Moreover, a rookie can learn better from his mistakes on his own, and whatever few bucks he loses is the small price of his experience. And a stripper who cheats customers will get her comeuppance in time.
I would agree that about the creepy part. :) But, she with her "chip on her shoulder" combined with the approach by the rookie combined with with her very sensual dances had me ALL EYES. :) And, I was counting the dances because I wanted to approach her for dances since she was doing such a good job. Yes, you might not think that makes sense. But, if I see something special I will start counting to get some idea when they might be done. The record so far is something like 22 dances! LOL! Yes, I counted and enjoyed watching and I grabbed her as soon as she was finished. She actually said she needed to clean up first and then gave me the same type dances. :) She didn't last long unfortunately.
Very interesting and good points. Glad it wasn't as clear cut among posters as I thought it would be! :)
Better yet? Drive a 1996 Honda Accord with dinged up windshield. Fill it with old boxes of clothing and diapers.
I was watching the game unfold in slow motion and positioned myself to get the drop if necessary. I was in my car in the parking lot and I noticed the thief because of his body language as he was walking toward the van. Like the stripper with the "chip on her shoulder," I notice certain behaviour that is just a "little" different or suspicious. The van was locked and out comes the slim jim and it was like WOW! that was smooth (he did have some trouble getting the van started--only at the "last" moment did it turn over). At this point it was like do I want to get involved? And, the answer is NO, however, I'm going to watch it unfold just in case there is the unlikely event things go bad--like the owner showing up. I'm armed and actually although I've been normally well treated by the police my faith in the system is way below zero. Also, it is difficult for most people to understand . . . if the police treat you well 18 or 19 times out of 20 that really isn't too good! (Hint: If the police say you're guilty, then pray for a good plea deal.) Like I had told one officer, "I'm going to get a fair trial in America?" Surprisingly, he didn't think I would. But, it didn't make *any* difference because of course I was guilty in his opinion and I in "theory" was guilty of "technical" violations (felonies), but nothing in the moral sense and truly the officer didn't care about the "technicals" (and there were "racial" problems even though I'm white). Those (technicals) were just a means to an ends. Anyway, I was far more concerned with the police than with some potentially armed car thief. And, if I was pro-active instead of hoping the van owner didn't show then it is a relatively easy situation. Over confident, yes, but still very wary. If I believe in the courts, then I will act and hopefully the thief doesn't force me to fire. Anyway, good courts or bad courts I can see it argued that you have NO business "taking the law into your own hands." LOL! :) I was brainwashed when young to do unto others as you would have them do unto you or something like that. So, I really wanted to do the "right" thing . . . the "right" thing being what I would want someone to do if I was the van owner, which would be STOP the thief with minimal force.
BTW, obeying the law isn't necessarily the "right" thing, imo. Many people can't comprehend that.
As far as the dancer, I was turned off from getting the dances that I had planned to buy. Now, I'm thinking some dance purchases if she is available and willing might help smooth things over and help her think more positively. :) Not too bright? :)
I believe her theft hurts the other dancers in the pocket book. Customers not feeling as free to just let the songs roll or buy them in the first place.
And, I think it hurts the dancers as far as work environment. The customers, many of them, are bad enough without potentially increasing and creating more abusive customers. And, some of the dancers at Angels have expressed a belief that the actions of one dancer can effect them all negatively---the one dancer can't just think what is best for her, iows. She needs to think about the larger context.
SuperDude already explained how it may protect future customers. Of course, the argument that the normal rules of society don't apply in a stripclub is true to a *certain* extent, but those rules aren't dumped entirely, imo. Overcounting dances or doubling the price after the fact doesn't, imo, have any special protected status in a stripclub nor can I see why it should be protected. It seems to be an overall negative for both customers and dancers.
The customer DID appreciate my being a "busybody" and if he didn't then more likely than not I would just consider him amusing. I can see him saying "How dare you watch my dances." Hello buddy, you don't wish to be observed in the public area there VIP rooms and also more discrete areas of the club. :)
Hopefully, things will work out ok between me and the "injured" dancer. :)
A simple question for you. Is it possible for you to type a relatively short and concise answer?
Every once in a while I do. :)
I'm sure you didn't learn your mind reading skills from me. But in that instance you shown that you could act like you have a sack.
A side note: Now that you have mastered the concise answer, can you try to go for one fucking day without mentioning that the justice system was designed to screw jayblake? That shit is getting old.
I don't follow "is from the prisons ... society owes her a debt." What does this comment mean?