Roderigo the Robe Man -- Coming to the United States ( fiction in installments
san_jose_guy
money was invented for handing to women, but buying dances is a chump's game
Introducing: Roderigo the Robe Man. He is exactly like his name sounds. He is, or he was, the guy who passes out the robes in Tijuana's Hong Kong Bar, when you want to take a girl out into the hotel. He is smart and he knows how to speak with Gringos, so he gets good tips.
He had worked there just over 1 year, seeing all these Gringos getting to fuck some of their most beautiful of women. Originally he was okay about it, but then it started to eat at him. Its not that he minds what the girls do, its just that he wanted to be doing more.
He had started to think about this much, then finally he saw a sign on a telephone pole:
"Want to get rich and retire? Then you need to learn the secrets of Financial Literacy."
It said to send $29.95 by check or money order and SASE to an address in Las Vegas Nevada.
"Hey, what the hell, why not, thought Roderigo. I've given up more money than that for worse."
So he did it.
And sure enough, in 2 weeks he got his envelop back. He held it up to the light and he could see that their was something inside of it.
So he sat down at an outdoor restaurant table, just outside of the Zona, on Avenida Revolución. He ordered his food, and then after the waiter left him, he opened up the envelope.
It was just one page, and it said:
"
If you want to get rich, you have to get control of other people's money. There is no Financial Literacy except for this. But how you get control of other people's money will vary, mostly according to how wealthy the people you are trying to get money off of are.
1. If you are going after poor people, you can usually find a way to set things up so that they have no other choice except to give you their last dollar. Look at things like cell phone service providers, car insurance, payday lending, bail bonding, used automobile tires, and of course gambling.
2. If you are going after people who are a little richer, you want them to think that giving you money will make them rich, and most of all that it will prove that they are smart. So look at things like quasi legal investments in grey area clandestine businesses.
3. If you are going after the very richest of marks, you need to come up with something which will make them look like they are brilliant humanitarians and altruists. Look to things like the Charter Schools movement and the Financial Literacy movement.
So get yourself a PO box and then make a sign like the one you saw, and start putting it places where people will see it so they can start sending you money. Photocopy this page so that you can stay out of trouble with the law by sending it back to them in their envelopes.
"
Roderigo was surprised, this what not really what he was expecting. But working the year passing out robes so that Gringos could fuck their women, it had made him think. These were all ideas he had considered.
But Roderigo was not actually going to do what the page suggested. He already had had bigger ideas of his own. But what the one page did do was convince him that he needed to act, and that he should not be completely alone in this. He could use what it said in the one page as his unstated background understanding. He already was on good terms with some real high roller Gringos. But now he finally knew how he should try to approach them. And Roderigo knew that with El Jefe Trump in charge, things in the United States were almost never really how they looked.
Roderigo had a high roller Gringo friend Rick, and so they made a plan. Roderigo went and bought a new suit, and the dress shoes to go with it. Then he carefully folded it all up and tied it up tight in a nylon bag.
Then Roderigo bought some good boots, just like the ones the coyotes that get people across the boarder wear, and he got some clothes which were all black.
He knew some painters who had the highest of extension ladders on the top of their truck. They said they would let him use it. No one on the Mexican side cares about such stuff. And he got some rope for coming down the other side. Then around 3 am, up and over Trump's wall he went.
(Keep Checking For The Next Installment)
SJG
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SJG
So Roderigo descended down the US side of the wall, using the rope tied to his extension ladder. His gringo friend Rick had gotten him some used and worn gloves. Rick sells cars at a BMW dealership in Los Angeles. He traded some new gloves for old gloves with one of their landscapers.
Rick also got Roderigo a yellow safety vest. Roderigo remembered that Rick told him that Mexican's are always welcome in the United States, so long as they are seen as doing the most menial of jobs.
So Roderigo headed off, with his clothes in a nylon bag. He was planning to sleep in the trees and bushes in the middle of freeway clover leaves as he made his way north. Not expecting any trouble so long a he looked like the most menial of laborers.
He walked long and far for each of 4 days. Then on the next day, when he woke up, he went to a gas station and washed up. Then he unpacked his nice suite and his nice shoes and put them on. Then he went to Rick's BMW dealership. And the exchanged a warm greeting.
Then they went to get Roderigo a hair cut and some more clothes.
Then they went to the MBZ dealership which Rick had used to work for. They thought about using a BMW, but that is not really the image they want. And this is after all, all about image.
Rick slipped them a couple of Benjamins, then Rick loaded some stuff into a 4 door S-class, and they took off on a test drive. What that consisted of was driving across the street to the parking lot of a vacant office building.
So Roderigo would do the talking, and Rick would hold the camera.
So with Roderigo opposite the car's broadside, and with the camera running, he started in.
"I am Roderigo Riviera, the founder and President of Irvine National Bank. I am a Mexican. But I am a Mexican who thinks just like you do. As a small boy I heard stories about the United States, stories about hard work and frugality, and about creating wealth. Then I moved to the border, Tijuana. When the gringo's came for the putas, err, I mean when the Rich Americans came for the beaches, for the food, and for the offshore snorkeling, I talked with them. I learned that America is a land of upwards mobility. So I became a Mexican who thinks just like Americans. And this is why I have started my bank, for people just like you, people who want to get ahead in life."
So Roderigo walked along the front of building, as Rick followed him with the camera. He came to the building's entrance, where Rick had set up a sandwich sign. It said,
"
Financial Literacy Program Tonight
You know how to work for money, let us show you how to make money work for you
"
Speaking into the camera, Roderigo explained, "At our bank we will give you the skills you need to get rich."
(Keep checking for the next installment)
SJG
Stanley Clarke Herbie Hancock & Chaka Khan Live
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9urd9Mc5…
So this time Rick brought Roderigo to a new church, and introduced him to their Pastor Dick. They Rick and Roderigo made a plan.
So the next night was a special event for the launching of their Prosperity Ministry.
So Pastor Dick started thing off, and then he introduced Roderigo and explained that his Irvine National Bank would be donating $50k to start their Prosperity Ministry.
So Roderigo gave his talk, "I am a Mexican, a Mexican who thinks just like you. I came here because I knew that the United States was the land of upwards mobitlity. But I also knew that it really is God who makes it this way. God told Elijah to come out of the cave, because he had something better for him. See he wants you to have a better car, and a better house, and a better job. So with my bank and with this Prosperity Ministry, we will be helping people to actualize God's will for them."
Roderigo was treated to a huge round of applause.
(keep checking for next installment)
SJG
So Rick and Roderigo were driving back to their bank on the freeway. They passed under a billboard, and there it was, Roderigo, done up so you could see the love of God radiating from his face. He was leaning over the hood of the black S-Class, like he was speaking right to you. At the top of this sign it said,
"I'm A Mexican Who Thinks Just Like You"
than under the image of Roderigo, it said,
"Roderigo Riviera, President Irvine National Bank"
So Rick spoke to Roderigo, now you know that we can not yet open accounts or accept depositor money. But we can sell equity shares. But as these are not yet registered shares, the buyers will have to sign this disclosure. He pointed to this stack of 1/2" thick paper packets.
(keep checking for next installment)
SJG
So the next day Roderigo and Rick headed out again in the S-Class. Passing under yet another highway billboard, Roderigo talking to you will leaning across the hood of the S-Class. The caption saying, "I'm a Mexican who thinks just like you."
This time it was to the Riverside Rotary Club. Roderigo gave his standard pitch. Then a very heavy white woman, middle aged, dyed blonde hair came up to him and said,
"Roderigo, we are all so glad that you are hear. Other Mexicans come here, they sneak in, or they have falsified papers, and then they sit around and drink, and maybe work as gardeners. The example they set for our children is not good. It is they who make our children into racists. So we need more Mexicans like you Roderigo."
(keep checking for next installment)
SJG
"Still no license, so we can't open accounts or take deposits."
"But we are doing real well on equity money, its just that the disclosure packet if over an inch thick. But most people don't even seem to read it."
Now at another Pentecostal Church, the Pastor "Yes and I know you'll be impressed. If we had more Mexicans here like Roderigo things would be much different. $50,000 donation from his bank to our new Prosperity Ministry".
"
My country Mexico is a very poor country. But I learned from the Rich Americans who come for the sun, the desert, the ocean, and the food. Then I worked in Tijuana and saved up money and make my United States contacts. I'm a Mexican who thinks just like you do.
What I learned from the Americans who set up a Pentecostal Church in Tijuana is that God told Elijah to come out of the cave, because he had something better for him. See, he wants you to have a better car and a better house and a better job.
At my bank we will teach you the skills of Financial Literacy and the power of how to be Motivated for Success!"
There was a huge round of applause, and them a receiving line of those who had to shake hands with Roderigo.
Rick handled the equity money table.
SJG
Rick introduces Roderigo, "Our bank President, Roderigo Riviera, The Mexican Who Thinks Just Like You."
Roderigo gave his standard pitch about learning from the Gringos, Rich Americans. An over stuffed and over dressed woman approaches him and she is ecstatic. "Roderigo, you don't know how much we have needed you here. I never wanted my kids to grow up as racists. But when they seen the other Mexican immigrants, doing manual labor, what else could be expected. But with you, the President of a new bank, and teaching people financial literacy so that they too can be successful, that changes everything."
SJG
Deep Purple
Knocking At Your Back Door (Live)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OU8TZ00k…
We, Roderigo did so well handing out robes at the Tijuana Hong Kong bar for a reason, he knows how to play people.
"Well maybe we really don't need to have accounts or a license, we can just take in share holder money."
SJG
We, Roderigo did so well handing out robes at the Tijuana Hong Kong bar for a reason, he knows how to play people.
"Well maybe we really don't need to have accounts or a license, we can just take in share holder money."
SJG
SJG
Michelle Alexander on The New Jim Crow, at Union Theological Seminary ( she wrote a very important book )
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T79I1PLT…
Paul Tillich Symposium: John Caputo Lecture
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cog1v44W…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FthM86ds…
Dominican Republic has legal prostitution. So Roderigo is getting some new ideas.
SJG
SJG
SJG
SJG
Roderigo makes White Southern Californians feel vindicated in their overall prejudice against Mexicans, because Roderigo, as they see it, is the exception.
SJG
He appears everywhere saying, "I am a Mexican but I think just like you."
He is loved because he justifies the prejudice that White people feel about the other Mexicans.
Roderigo had met a friend Rick, a car salesman, in the HK bar. And once he got over the wall he spent several days walking and sleeping outdoors until he could make it to Rick's MBZ dealership in Los Angeles.
There they got Roderigo cleaned up and got him some clothes. They borrowed an MBZ S-class and took it across the street to take some pictures of Rick.
So now there are billboards everywhere with the name of his bank, and a picture of Roderigo with the S-class, telling you, "I'm a Mexican but I think just like you."
He is so well know not that the CDC has hired him to make promotional bill boards for the COVID vaccine.
So you see in the background the picture of Roderigo with the S-class. And then in the foreground Roderigo has his coat off and his sleeve rolled up and he is looking right at you as a doctor sticks the needle in his arm.
SJG
SJG