Joke: Gay Couple On A Plane
shailynn
They never tell you what you need to know.
"What if we had sex?" asks Jeremiah.
"Are you crazy? Here, on the plane? It would be awkward, everyone would watch us doing it..."
"Nobody is even paying attention to anything. Look!"
Jeremiah stands up and asks loudly:
"Could I have a napkin, please?"
Nobody gives a damn. Everyone is sleeping, reading, looking out the window, etc. Flight attendants pretend to not hear them, as they also don't give a damn.
"They really wouldn't care then, would they?" says Timothy.
So Jeremiah and Timothy have wild sex on the plane.
Later, when the plane arrives to the airport and the people are leaving, the stewardess sees an old man who threw up all over his shirt, even his pants are soaking in the filth.
"Sir, you should've asked for a bag!"
"I didn't dare" whispers the old man. "A few rows ahead I saw a man asking for a napkin and he got fucked in the ass..."
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The "big airlines" have old hags who are hateful and mean who must be seeking revenge on all the supposed slights they think they endured when they were younger.
My typical behavior on a flight lean back close my eyes and not speak to anyone AT ALL, I bring a bottle of water with me, politely refuse drink service and do not ask the flight attendant for anything. I stay in my rented space(seat) and try to not even accidentally touch the passenger next to me. In today's litigious climate the slightest casual contact may be construed as grounds for a lawsuit so zero contact neither physical nor verbal is my policy. I look forward to a time when I never have to go near an airport ever again.
Flying was pleasant and fun in the 60's and 70's, in the 80's it was tolerable but has gotten progressively more and more like a Tokyo subway with a prostate exam that has to be endured in order to do your job.
I used to travel about 3 weeks/mo., starting about 6 months after 9/11. Security was easy for me since I had a DOD badge but the airline folks got progressively less attentive as time went on. I now travel a lot less and I hate flying.
The biggest bummer is that I was waiting for the time when the stewardesses were younger than I am but that hasn't happened. I'm approaching 40 and most of the stewardesses are grouchy, frumpy, and in their 50's.