Middle Class Flirting: Grinding on the Buddies Wife.

avatar for GACA
GACA
Un-retired: Met my ATF. Married her. Divorcing her.
I've notice that when I'm hanging out with my "middle class" friends there is a lot of sexual flirtation going on.

Case in point, I have oneset of acquaintances and the guy won't go out with his wife to the bars and clubs, inevitably through the course of the night while he is at home and we are out the wife and and will end up dancing and grinding away like I'm paying her for a high two way contact lap dance. I'll even peck her neck and ears because heavy drinking is involved. Now we haven't slept together or anything like that but this flirtation continues into the home in front of hubby with her sitting on my lap in front of him and pretending to be lovers.

This always, always happens not just with that couple but every "middle class" couple I hang out with. And yes every once in a while it has led to a lot more than flirting.

I don't get it personally. Once or twice is funny, but if a guy I barely kniw is flirting with my girl every time they see each other that's a problem.

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avatar for JohnSmith69
JohnSmith69
10 years ago
By any chance did you find these "friends" in a magazine for swingers?

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=QvyyYDfe0I… (Great episode)

avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
10 years ago
Wow, sounds like your friends are swingers. That's how it starts.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
Mmm...ok.
What are the rules to swinging, I'm going to explore this.

This has happened to me more than a few times and being oblivious I probably missed out on a few opportunities.
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
10 years ago
Well, if a couple you know invites you over for a pool bbq, and the girl is drunk and all over you in front of the guy, that's a pretty good sign
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
Holy shit...
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
So is it like fight club And nobody talks about fight club you just know and engaging in these activities. Her dude can totally kick my ass, so I would not want to be wrong about it.
avatar for mikeya02
mikeya02
10 years ago
I really don't know. I think some couples spring it on a friend for kicks or to see what happens. But that's not what I wanted.
avatar for Corvus
Corvus
10 years ago
While she is sitting on your lap, grinding, flirting, etc., ask her if her husband is just going to watch the two of you fuck or does he plan on joining in? That should get her attention.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
10 years ago
GACA,

Sorry to say, but the first word that popped into my head was DENSE!
avatar for seaboardrr
seaboardrr
10 years ago
It does sound like you may have stumbled into some couples who may be swingers of some sort. Or it could simply be that the husband or husbands are completely oblivious or unconcerned about the sexual needs of their wives. If it's a bad marriage the husband may not even pay attention to what she does or may be happy you're keeping her off his back.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
So what do your rich and poor friends do?
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
I don't have rich friends unfortunately, and I try to stay away from the poor ones.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
@clubber I haven't had to many "friends" who were like super OK with me actually screwing their wife.
avatar for Clubber
Clubber
10 years ago
GACA,

Understood, but if she instigates AND you desire her, I sure would push the limits and see where they are. Of course, this could have the effect of ending it all, friendship included.
avatar for shailynn
shailynn
10 years ago
Friends, are these guys like "life long friends" or some buddies from work you've known for 4 years?

Anyway, if this is someone I'm close with like a life long friend that I grew up with, I personally would never ever risk ruining the relationship by trying to fuck my friend's wife even if he was okay with it. Way too awkward and to me a long lasting friendship is more valuable than a romp in the hay.
avatar for tumblingdice
tumblingdice
10 years ago
Tumblingflirtdice.Gotta be in it to win it.
avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf
10 years ago
Years ago, Saturday Night Live did a skit about two couples hanging out partying. The wife of one couple was outrageously flirtatious and sexy. When the more conservative couple responded to her flirtation, the sexy wife acted outraged and offended. One of SNL’s better skits.

I’ve experienced both circumstances. One, the wife was extremely flirtatious but turned out to be nothing but a tease. The other, we got down, and it caused a great deal of awkwardness that damaged the friendship.

Blue balls or a ruined friendship. Not worth the game.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
@Lone_wolf I'm not too worried about the friendship. I just didn't want to read too much into the behavior because some people like to play around but do not intend to follow through. That said she's always coming on to me. Hand was on her ass. Her husband doesn't have a career, he does have a job but she's a higher class girl and I think she starting to have contempt for his situation.
avatar for Tiredtraveler
Tiredtraveler
10 years ago
Just be careful because one person's "innocent" flirt may not be anything more than just a flirt. I have been a church functions and have seen women get very physical flirting with other men and then turn into nasty self righteous bitches who were "flirting" just to get some poor guy to slaughter when he responds to the touches and casual rubs in kind. I try to stay away from other men's women because I am allegic to bullet holes.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
10 years ago
Could be you're the hot single friend and they're attracted. Could be they're swingers. Could be -- and here's where my $ is -- the women are using you to either get more attention from their husbands, or find a way out of their relationship. They don't care whether or not this could potentially ruin your relationship with their husband, the reason you are attractive to them is because you're a convenient tool to force the issue with their real relationship, one way or the other. Then, they get the attention they wanted, or a divorce, your usefulness to them ends, and the friendship is over, with justifiably bad feelings on the part of your bros.

If you value your friendship with the guys, I'd run. And do not interpret the attraction the women have towards you, as anything but utilitarian.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
@subraman that is the most insightful advice ever.
avatar for Subraman
Subraman
10 years ago
Well, if there's one thing tuscl is known for, it's the depth of the insights here.

I'm thinking of creating a thread about The System, to even out my karma :) :)
avatar for Lone_Wolf
Lone_Wolf
10 years ago
@subraman - Yes great insight. The problem is when the drink starts flowing and they turn on that sexy flirtatious vibe, it is damn near impossible not to pursue regardless of the situation. If they are fine that is.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
@Lone_wolf good point about the alcohol. It's usually flowing heavily, and I pretty much treat these women like I do strippers, buying drinks, sticking dollars down their blouse. They eat that shot up.
avatar for skibum609
skibum609
10 years ago
Wife and I swing, but we have swinger friends and not with friends we've had for over 20 years. Plus with my lifelong friends and my best friends wife and I are hot for each other, would I ever allow it to get anywhere near sex because sex is replaceable 24/7 and true friends can never be replaced.
avatar for dtek
dtek
10 years ago
@GACAclub
It sounds like they're into being desired and maybe fantasize about being desired in the way they imagine strippers are desired. That doesn't mean they want to fuck you. Even strippers don't (usually) *want* to fuck you. They'll just do it if a large enough incentive is offered.
avatar for GACA
GACA
10 years ago
Yes that is what the strippers told me last night. They are just doing it for attention.
avatar for dtek
dtek
10 years ago
^^^ Oh great. Now I'm starting to think like a stripper. :/

;)
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