So what goes on in those swingers clubs?

So that leaves me out, both on the looks and "apparent cock size" criteria. Unless they're looking a cock that's "apparently not there", anyway.

At most swingers clubs single men are band. Serten single women can get in. I know this becuase I have friends that are swingers. But then again every swingers club has it own rules.

I did some internet research on swingers clubs a year or so ago just to find out what they were about. Bang69 is right, most of them do not allow single men "except in special circumstances". I took that to mean that they would be with a club member(s) and probably be exceptionally good looking and hung. Most of the clubs required some sort of phone interview before disclosing their location. This Trapeze club seems atypical in many ways.

On a busy night at the former Chameleon Club in WP one might find several dancer-customer couples having sex openly in the "apartment". Damn fires.

I have some experience with swingers clubs, bar meets and house parties in the Phoenix area. Based on that experience, I would never go as a single male. But the clubs tend to allow them (up to a limit) as they generate much needed revenue. Unfortunately, half of them are pervs, even by swinger standards. There's nothing quite like having a nice conversation with a good looking lady, looking around and realizing some guy ten feet away is banging his meat while looking at her. Yeah, that was just wonderful.

A woman I knew a few years ago asked me to go to one with her. She had been a member with her exhusband. I said no. Really not my scene.

Not my scene. POP here in Houston for me with fav x striper and SA girls in 100-150 range. I am neither single nor young and have a VIP at an extras SC.

I cant see paying some kind of big entry fee to enter a Swinger club not knowing if I will even get pussy. Many of those gals are average at best and no competetion for strippers and hookers.

Years ago in San Diego I hired a street hooker to be my date at a swingers club (you could c the needle marks on her arms if you looked closely). We of course swapped off and some of them lined up to gang bang her on an air mattress thinking she was the sexy horny young wife. I did a couple of their wives who were nowhere near as attractive as my hooker date. It was exciting with some guys wife on an air mattress, one gal I got to do her without a condom. She was attractive, blonde, about 30, slightly overweight and said they did this every Wednesday nite. Afterwards "You guys come back next week - looks like your wife really had fun" she said smiling. She added "its nice and save here." I tried to get her phone number but she said she did not cheat on her husband. Unbelievable.

I like dressing in "kink" gear and going without the expectation that I'll get laid. There are two places in NOLa where the odd weekend has a "gangbang" or "group party" night, and showing up early in the outfit (and being comfortable in it) will get you chosen among the various schlepps who just dropped by in their polo shirt and khakis. You still have to pay the $50, but, the hotter you can dress yourself up, in something memorable and off-kilter, the more likely you'll have a fun time. Once in the inside, I simply try to think of it as a strip club with benefits, and I meet people. Generally couples want to approach single men, rather than vice-versa, so if a gal comes by to initiate a conversation, you can probably assume that her husband or boyfriend is watching nearby; whereas if a husband or boyfriend comes by first, then you are likely going to be solicited for homosexual or group-o-sexual or bi-sexual activity. (At least, that's the case at these clubs in this city.) People are often on-edge, and I'd say a good 50% of all "real swingers" who are participating in any scene-night are actually "first time real swingers" or "second time real swingers," and therefore still feeling out their way as well.

My recommendations: Don't drink, do no drugs, be tight and fit (no belly! none at all!), and wear a lot of black leather. I own a pair of black leather jeans, some black square-toed doc-martin-style shoe-boot thingummies (half-ankle height, about like converse high-tops), and a leather Mardi Gras mask that's made of leather in black, plus purple-green-and-gold (the Mardi Gras colors). I put on a plain white muslin shirt, or maybe just a tight white or black t-shirt, above all that. No undies, or a thong. Sometimes suspenders. I know, I know, I end up looking like the biker from the Village People, but hey, it gets me past the door! Women will make passes at men who look gay, more often than at men who look straight, even if they women are looking for straight partners. (I dunno. You explain it. It never made sense to me, either.)

Unfortunately, of course, men will make passes at me too. It's not a big deal here, though it might be in some other cities where the gay scene is less public. For me, thanks to my upbringing and the city's general attitude toward homosexuality, I don't find it too much of a problem. I don't mind meeting gay and bi-sexual men, and speaking with them as friendly chats at the bar, as long as they're cool with the idea that I'm not going to be very interested in fucking them (I try to hint about it early on in the evening; there's always some troll who thinks he can "convert" me, but if he's being offensive like that, then I don't mind conversely offending him too, by just rejecting him outright). Often the gays in a city are more worldly aware and informed, anyway; they read the news, and don't just assume that the right-wing talk-radio shock-jocks are automatically correct about everything, so it's OK with me to meet intelligent people.

But the gay problem is about 10% of the night, max. I don't mean to over-emphasize it. The bigger problem, that occupies about 50% of your time, or more, is the fat-hideous-woman problem. Hubby hates fucking her since he's stuck his dick into the same goddamned saddle for twenty years, she has finally hit that post-menopause point where she can goddamned admit that horniness isn't a curse from satan but instead actually one of heaven's gifts, she wants to glory in all her wonderful womanness, and hubby can't figure out any other way to satisfy the gaping bottomless pit of neediness than to tell her to join him on a swingers night. And so there I am, in my leather outfit, and she approaches and I have to be polite. It's really quite stunning how many people simply don't understand this notion: If you are not physically attractive to me, then I am not attracted to being physical with you; or, to put it differently: If you are not physically attractive, then don't expect to attract people physically; or, another slant: sex is a physical act, and you are not attracting me to that act with you, since you do not physically attract me, since you are not physically attractive. I have had to EXPLAIN this goddamned obvious concept to three or four people, and one husband actually THANKED me later on for being honest with his wife. It was like, she never "got" the concept, always assuming "Hey, I have pussy, therefore men want to fuck me me glorious me."

So, THAT'S the worst part of the evening. That, and the smell, if the hosts don't know what they're doing. Never go in August or January, when the windows can't be opened. There will be Febreeze. Lots of Febreeze.