completely dead on a Saturday at 8pm

I went to Sapphire last Saturday evening after originally trying to go to Deja Vu. (As an aside, turns out Deja Vu is closed for "a few weeks" due to renovations. Sure would be nice if their website, or even their huge reader board outside, noted this, but I guess that's too much to ask.) Sapphire was close by so I gave it a shot. I called first, and as a Vegas local, was told I could be on the guest list for free cover, and that all worked out just fine.

Upon entering Sapphire, I was in line behind four people, two men and two woman, who were all together. However, the guy with the metal detector was telling them that they couldn't go in because one of the women was wearing flip flops. This was pretty crazy to me - she was an attractive enough woman, and we're in a STRIP CLUB, not a Michelin-starred restaurant or the Sistine Chapel or something. Dudes were inside wearing backwards baseball caps, and the dancers are topless, you're checking us all for weapons, yet you're beefing about a cute woman wearing flip flops? Pretty lame.

Anyways, I was next up, and after being searched, I was handed off to an employee who said that if I wanted to sit at a table, he could lead me to one, or else I could show myself to the bar. The whole thing was weird to me and I didn't know if I'd have to tip if he gave me a table, and I could see it was ridiculously dead inside, so I opted for the bar - but not before he tried to sell me a cigar from their selection in a gleaming display case. The whole thing just felt so contrived - like "fake luxury" or something. Again, they're checking us for weapons and dudes are wearing sports jerseys. This is a strip club where we want to exchange money for looking at boobs; why are we pretending we're in some sort of royal palace?