My Annual Pilgrimage to See if Anything Has Improved (Spoiler: Nope)

There is a club I go to in Phoenix where the posted lap dance price is $10 per dance on the floor seats. At that club, I pay $20 per dance because each and every dancer who dances for me is worth it, from both a body and a contact perspective. Unfortunately, as Maximus said to Proximo in "Gladiator," "This is not it. THIS IS NOT IT!"

Christie's is a very clean, very spacious club located inconveniently on the west side of Baseline just past the 10 freeway. Very difficult access you're driving from east to west. Early afternoon, parking lot mostly empty. Walk in to an anteroom, where you pay the admission (free to me as I have a VIP card) and get your license scanned. If you're one of those paranoid about getting his license scanned, then turn the fuck around and leave, cuz it's going to happen.

Once you walk through the doors to the main room, the DJ booth and bar are to your left (6 very valuable seats at the bar) and probably 50-60 tables spread throughout the club. When there are only 4 PLs in da house, the only word to describe it would be "cavernous." The VIP area is way to the right of the club (dances I believe are still $25/song there, but not 100% certain). One main round stage with a stripper pole, dancers do 2-song sets. There is a second stage that I've only seen used at night when there is an actual crowd to be entertained.