Spy, car sales, bleh, on hold, more bleh, perfection, and wet ending

I always had the intent of checking place out, but I usually ended up some place else. A particular Friday night that the warden was out of town, I decided to go once and for all. I arrived some time around 10 PM. I won't go over the details of place. Everyone that has mentioned anything about it, has been right on the money. Cover was $12 and I don't recall paying for parking. I ordered a couple of drinks just to get in the mood. They were overpriced and ok as you would expect. Couldn't really find a seat, so I just hung out by the bar until I was approached. First woman that approached me was what I would describe as a Russian MILF straight out of my fantasy book. You could definitely tell she was at least 40, but time had been very kind to her. Maybe her Russian accent that reminded me of a high school crush is what attracted me, or maybe her very tender and natural fun bags. Either way, I decided to get a couple of dances from her. Even though I was offered more fun upstairs, I declined because I wanted to check out the rest of the fresher merchandise. Next, was one of the fresher merchandise. Early 20's, long dark hair, huge fun bags, and OK ass. I was intrigued by these fun bags so I got a couple of dances from her. She seem cool up until she pulled the "every one has been an asshole to me, please make my night better by spending money on me" sales tactic. I called her bullshit and she just laughed. Again, I was offered more fun upstairs, but I wasn't willing to drop the money for an OK ass (did I mentioned I'm an ass guy?). Next was an even younger girl. Possibly 18-19 (I swear I wasn't working my way down the age spectrum). She was OK altogether. She had an OK face, OK fun bags, and OK ass. We apparently had a few things in common so I thought "meh, what the hell, give me a dance". Then I saw this beautiful blonde with a great ass so I thought "I gotta get that." When I asked her for a dance she had a bit of an attitude but I didn't think too much of it (should've seen it as a red flag). When found a booth and she sat and said "I'm just going to wait for the next song". And started texting. It annoyed me a little but I was like whatever. New song started and 20 seconds in, the bitch started texting as she was shaking her ass. That's when I told her I was done, gave her money to stop and when on to look for another dance. I was getting ready to leave. I got a couple of more dances, but nothing too great and I couldn't find anything else that peaked my interest, until I saw another blonde, with better natural fun bags than the first one, and a plumped ass that matched her frame (not ridiculous huge). I totally when for that. I was getting a great dance that I asked if we could take the party upstairs. When we got upstairs, waitress brought a bottle, so we drank for a bit and she definitely took care of me afterwards. By now, it was near closing time. It took me some time to find that perfect girl, but it was worth the wait. It didn't mattered that as I was leaving, I got soaked by severe thunderstorm that was forecasted and I totally forgot about. Will definitely be back when the warden is out of town again.