Old Gau Gau's; the pride and...

Old Gau Gau's; the pride and joy of Rocky Point (Puerto Penasco). I've been here over a dozen times and it's clearly the best strip club in town. It's off infamous 13th Street, where you can find almost anything. On weekends this place is a mix of locals and Americans, often with their "try-hard" girls in tow. Nothing puts me in a foul mood quicker than seeing some fat, drunk American princess think she's the coolest, hottest creature in the room because she can tip and high-five the dancer on stage... stay the fuck home and let the boys enjoy themselves!

On weekends there's lots of girls to choose from: I'd say at least 15, and mostly 7s and 8s, although sometimes an 8.5 shows her face too. The girls are mostly in shape and many have fake tits. Lap dances are normally $20 for about 5 minutes, but get the 3 for $40 deal and sample different girls. Very good mileage with some (but not all) girls. Spanish helps, but it's not critical. A 1 hour sex session in the club is about $200 or so, although taking the girls home is only $40 more. Domestic beer is $3.50 and I think highballs are either $5 or $6, so not cheap considering the venue. Ambiance is average; mix of sofas and stand-up tables. Older pool table in a side room. One central stage, with small cubicles next to it for private lap dances. Service is good, but very persistent, so tip large to start with and tell them you're in no rush and just want to enjoy the show. My man, Arturo, speaks excellent English and will essentially be your personal valet if you tip him $5-10 bucks right off the bat. He'll tell you which of the girls give the most mileage and even do some translating for you.

If you want cheaper sex, consider some of the girls on 13th Street. If you go through a tout, the price is about $100 for a couple hours back at your place ($20 for him, $80 for her). If you can speak some Spanish, get the girls number and avoid the tout and maybe you can even bargain down to $60. Lots of girls are on the take because of the economic conditions of the town, so it never hurts to ask. Drugs are pretty prevalent too, so that may be a good or bad thing for you, but I like my girls clean in every sense of the word. Last time down, I scooped up a fresh 18 year old for an entire night for $80 and then took her to the Mayan Palace the next day for lunch because it was her birthday (18th). Good times, but I am conversational in Spanish, so that helps.