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9 years ago
...ooppss typo...*However, HE has never been with an Asian until me....
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9 years ago
Thank you for all of your input! My instinct definitely said that he was not telling me the whole truth. Just as everyone stated, there is no way a man would visit those types of places without any expectation of having a sexual service done to him. I'm hurt more about being lied to and being treated as if I was stupid than about him getting a handjob or others.
Since I can't be 'variety' to him, I am going to agree on us bringing in a 'third person'. However, we can only do things as a couple, no solo actions. Somehow I doubt he'd stick and be able to commit to it. If he can't, we'll just have to have an open relationship, which I know he would refuse, as he doesn't want any man to touch me. But fair is fair, right?
BTW, to answer the above question, he has a fair share of women - probably more than many in a lifetime - since he used to be in the bar business. DRUGS AND SEX were plenty. However, I has never been with an Asian unti me.....the more I think I more I wonder what I'm doing with him. Everything he does points to characteristic of a narcissist. I guess it is his good side that has kept me with him this whole time. :(
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9 years ago
SJG, thank you for your honest input. Any suggestions on how to get him to be open and honest about it?
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9 years ago
seaboardrr, I thought I would try to understand point of view of men who frequent strip clubs and massage parlors. By posting on this type of place, my expectation would be to gain some sort of an insight to WHY a man, who is seemingly content about his partner, needs to look for sexual connection elsewhere.
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9 years ago
jacobs.patrick7, no. no photos. I don't fall for that crap.
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9 years ago
Tiredtraveler, I am MORE than open to go clubbing with him. I will be more than glad to tag along to any sexual adventures he may spontaneous want to do. However, I feel he is not comfortable having me around.
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9 years ago
Shailynn, who is SJG????
Guys, thanks for your input so far. But seriously, I need some real advice. I would like to understand him better - maybe in hope to improve our relationship? Do I like that he visits Asian Massage Parlors? No. But am I willing to understand and accept his needs? Yes. I think I am more hurt about the fact that he hides it from me. I would have been fine, had he openly talk about it ala: "hey, babe. I was at this Massage parlor today...bla bla bla". I would have been fine if we were to set a boundary where we will only visit as a parlor, not solo. However, I know he would have not stuck to it. I would have also been fine if this was a two-way street. Not that I want to 'whore' around, but it should be fair. If he does it, then it should be ok for me to do it, too. If he doesn't want me to do it, then it should be the same for him. Though I know he would have not accepted for any man to touch me.
Maybe I'm just naive and should just walk away. But how can one throw away 4 years we have built? To him, as long as he provides and never lets me down, he is free to do whatever - quite selfish if you ask me..........To be honest, I'm confused. On one hand, I understand everyone is different. Every relationship is different. I'm willing to make it work so everyone is happy. But he does not communicate with me like that. He always gets defensive if I was to ever bring anything up. On the other hand, it is messed up and I feel unappreciated. I have many things to offer that many men wish they could find in a partner. I feel I enjoy many things that many women would simply say no to. But yet I'm not enough to make him only desire me.