tuscl

PussyLicker was so right about valet! OMG!

BubbleYum
Blow me. 😙 Pronouns: hoe/heaux
Friday, April 7, 2023 9:45 PM
It finally happened. Valet fucked up. I twerked somewhere on Eight Mile in Detroit last weekend. When I handed my vehicle keys over, my car had two wipers. I know this because I used them briefly during my trek through the ghetto to the club. (Or maybe, because I'm just a stripper, I don't know how to count to two?) I was one of the last ones to leave at the end of the night, so valet just handed me my keys instead of pulling my car up. I got about a mile down Eight Mile and used my wipers to clean my windshield only to discover the driver's side wiper blade was gone. It had been completely broken off. I was so mad and appalled! I almost called the police and considered contacting the news, but figured I should talk to valet first. I barely slept because all I could think about was how badly valet had fucked up! The next day, I mentioned it to the valet manager. He asked if I had inspected my car before leaving. Obviously, I didn't. And I know most people don't do a full inspection either - so don't be hypocritical and judge me. Anyway, he didn't apologize because that would have been accepting responsibility, but instead gave me $10 back so I could get a new wiper blade and promised me free valet parking for that shift and my next one. I'm writing this because I took a lesson from my bestie PussyLicker in complaining about valet on internet forums. As evidenced by him, it is surely the only way mandatory valet will come to an end. Fuck the dram shop law in Michigan that makes valet at strip clubs mandatory! I know, with this one solitary complaint, strip club owners will break their business contracts with all outsourced valet companies at their clubs and this will abolish mandatory valet parking once and for all. You're welcome. /sarcasm

9 comments

  • Muddy
    •
    a year ago
    We need to rain down some Rob Wolchek Hall of Shame on these Detroit valets.
  • shailynn
    •
    a year ago
    I’m trying to understand how any woman could not like a guy that goes by the name “pussylicker.” BTW how are the kittys doing?
  • Pussylicker2
    •
    a year ago
    I'm not sure how a valet would break a wiper parking your car, unless it was intentional.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    a year ago
    I don't like anyone driving my-car, valet or not; unless I don't have a choice. Not all valets are bad; but I've seen various instances of some of the shit they do when they think no-one is looking - and not trying to sound "elitist" but at the end of the day valet-drivers don't fall under "the best and the brightest".
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    a year ago
    "... He asked if I had inspected my car before leaving .." What a jackass - I'm sure "he would have taken responsibility" if you would have noticed the damage - if by some luck you notice the damage and point it out; I'm pretty-sure they'll say "the damage was there before"; or tell you "how do you/we know the damage was not already there".
  • BubbleYum
    •
    a year ago
    The whole parking lot is viewable on cameras to anyone who is near or looks towards the door. The recording loop is either 36 or 48 hours according to the head dj - I don't remember which. But valet knows I could have easily demanded to see the footage and they did technically leave my vehicle unattended when they went in the club to wait for us stragglers. I've been a long time dancer at this club and it's sister club, plus I have two of the owners' personal numbers should I ever need to call them, so I think that's why valet also worked with me.
  • Papi_Chulo
    •
    a year ago
    Well – to be fair – there are also a ton of lowlife-customers – from the valet-manager’s POV; just like a valet can fuck-up a custy’s car; so can a POS-custy claim the valet damaged the car when he knows the damage was there already and was just looking to get paid – and why I prefer to not have anyone drive my car b/c it’s a “out-of-sight out-of-mind” kinda-thing.
  • Pussylicker2
    •
    a year ago
    Scrub, you're not from detroit. Detroit is a shithole, like all big cities in america. The cops will steal your car for any reason at all, such as picking up a hooker. The action is in the near suburbs.
  • captainfun
    •
    a year ago
    I was wondering if some random customer broke the blade - just to be an ass. Not sure why or how a valet would break it.
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