You can be the fart whisperer. All you need to do is leave your head up your ass. Then you will hear your farts whisper in your ears often. You can wake up to the big farts. You can fall asleep to the whisper of the silent but deadly farts your farts can massage your neck if your head is far enough up there. Just imagine, you may even get a shoulder massage from your vibrating ass hole. All is bliss, I voted for Hillary
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