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Black_Mamba

I discovered both the Liquid Lapdance product & the TUSCL discussion board last week while I was surfing the internet. I was inspired by the honest, detailed, and funny posts by the members of TUSCL to write an article about this new lap dance product. Also, I plan to write some informative reviews in the future about the strip clubs I visit in North Carolina.

I purchased the Liquid Lapdance (3 Pack) on the Monday before thanksgiving and did not get to try them out until Black Friday. I came up with this experiment on the Wednesday before Thanksgiving after I finally got some free time away from all my extended family members. While all of my female family members were talking about shopping strategies in the kitchen, and all the male family members were watching football in the living room, I crept into my old room and created the following experiment.

Basically I wanted to answer the following question: Should I really spend $36.00 dollars for a 3 pack of LL (Liquid Lapdance) on a regular basis.

To answer this question, I figured I would have to test the product in various strip club environments and record the dances & pleasure received from each visit. I know that every strip club visit is not the same, so I figured I would have to set up some control variables in this experiment. I visited three different strip clubs in the Charlotte area and I kept all the following factors the same on every visit:

1. Visited each club at 3:00 PM (1 on Friday, 1 on Saturday, 1 on Monday)
2. Wore similar clothes to each club (Cheap XL Starter jacket, XL Fruit Of The Loom cotton shirt, Cheap XL 100% polyester sweatpants, Liquid Lapdance underwear)
3. Sat in the back of each club in a semi-private lap dance location
4. Did not order any drinks - I do not want the effects of alcohol to cloud my judgement
5. Decided the girl had to be random and decided to test the product on the first girl that approached me at each club
6. Decided to let this random girl dance for me up to 5 songs, even if she really sucked at dancing.
7. If Liquid Lapdance allowed me to bust a nut within five songs, then I would leave the club. If I could not bust in 5 songs, then I would make an excuse go to the bathroom, discard the LL underwear, and proceed with the rest of visit going commando.
8. If I ended up going commando, I would compare at least 2 commando dances to the LL dances using the same girl.

Let the experiment begin!

Experiment 1: Black Friday, 3:00 PM, Club Nikkis

Club Nikkis is an all black club in Charlotte NC that offers free cover until 7 PM and 5 dollar lap dances until 7 PM. Also, Nikkis is one of the best places in Charlotte for heavy grinding lap dances from just about any dancer on shift (Day Or Night). Due to the high probability of good dances by a random girl, I figured this would be an excellent place to do my first test of Liquid Lapdance. Also, If the product sucked then I would only lose 35 dollars maximum during the experiment ($5.00 x 5 Dances = 25 dollars in LL, $5.00 x 2 Dances = 10 dollars going Commando).

The following is a summary of my results for the Club Nikkis experiment using Liquid Lapdance:

Dancer Description: Hershey, Black, 5 Foot 3 Inches Tall, D Cup Boobs, DSL Lips, Thick Butt & Thighs

The first girl that approached me called herself Hershey. She had chocolate skin, thick hips, and a ton of booty meat. During some small talk, I discovered that she was in her early twenties and was attending college in NC. Hershey seemed like an average girl you would run into in a black strip club and she was an ideal candidate for my experiment.

Lap Dance Results: 5 Liquid Lapdances, 3 Commando Lapdances, 0 Nuts Busted.

Liquid Lapdance did slightly enhance the feeling of my lap dances with Hershey but only when my Johnson was perfectly placed between her cheeks. Hershey's lap dance technique included moderate to heavy grinding and my dick was sliding everywhere except where I wanted it to be. The lubrication is kind of a double-edged sword when it comes to Liquid Lapdance because it increases sensitivity but decreases the amount of good friction that you receive from grinding. On my next experiment, I knew I would have to find some way to keep my dick in one place in order to fully enjoy the product.

I told Hershey I needed a break after 5 dances and told her I would get a couple more dances from her after I returned from my car. Originally I had planned to change out my Liquid Lapdance underwear in Nikkis bathroom but anyone who has visited Nikkis knows that there is no stalls in the Mens bathroom. Let me tell you, there is no way in Hell I would get caught changing out of these things because they look fruity as Hell when that is all that you are wearing. Anyway, I changed in my car and came back for a couple commando dances with Hershey.

Overall, the 5 dances in LL were only slightly better then the dances I received going commando. Actually, I can't even say that they were better but that they provided a different sensation on my penis. I got just as much excitement from my 3 commando dances than I did from the 5 LL dances. Hershey actually grinded on my dick better in the commando dances than with the Liquid Lapdances. When I go commando my penis naturally hangs to the left and does not move very much. I think this allowed Hershey to adjust her body better and match exactly where my penis was located. Also, this is the reason why I received one extra commando dance from Hershey because she was grinding really well at the end of song number two.

Overall Report: I had fun conducting my first experiment mainly because I rarely get dances from the first girl that approaches me in a club. I was anxious to see if this new product would truly increase the quality of a lap dance from a random stripper that I have not specifically chosen based on her lap dance skills. My first impression, Liquid lapdance is better than wearing normal underwear but not better than commando.


Experiment 2: Saturday, 3:00 PM, Leather & Lace Southend

Leather & Lace is another great lap dance club in Charlotte and they have a better assortment of dancers than club Nikkis. The prices of dances are always $5.00 at Leather & Lace and the cover charge is free before 7 PM. However, there is a greater chance that you will run into a newbie that does not know how to dance because many girls start their stripping careers at Leather & Lace. I promised myself that no matter what stripper approached me first that I would conduct my experiment.

The following is a summary of my results for the Leather & Lace experiment using Liquid Lapdance:

Dancer Description: Blossom, Caucasian, Girl Next Door Type, 5'7, Brown Hair, C cups, Firm Ass & Long Legs

I did not catch Blossom's age but she looked like she was in her mid-twenties. She seemed very calm and easy going and I was not sure if she would be able to provide quality lap dances. Also, the DJ was playing Hard Rock, and Grunge music at the time I entered the club and I was not sure if Blossom could match the intensity of some of the songs. However, I took a chance and I received some pretty good results.

Lap Dance Results: 5 Liquid Lapdances, 1 Nut Busted

The first song I got a dance to was "Holy Water" by Soundgarden and Blossom did not know how to dance to this kind of Rock music. Her moves were very smooth and deliberate, I could tell she was a very sensual dancer that preferred slower tempos. I managed to get a full Hard On by the end of the second song, only because blossom had a fantastic, long, slender body. I remember getting hard right after I saw the perfect "heart gap" at the top of her thighs as she began to bend over with her legs together.

Blossom had pretty good lap dancing technique and adjusted her grinding to accommodate my fully erect penis. Blossom straddled my left leg and managed to get my dick in a great position to feel the effects of the Liquid Lapdance. In this position, the sensation on my dick was wonderful because her grinding made the latex of the Liquid Lapdance rub against both sides of my dick. It's hard to explain but when I go commando I'm used to only getting sensation exactly on the side of my dick in which the girl is grinding on me. However, a combination of the right position, lube, latex, and slow grinding made it feel like Blossom was pulling my dick on both sides during the lap dance.

Now the final song was "Come Together" by the Beatles, yes they really played this song in a strip club. Anyway, it worked out perfectly because the tempo of the song matched the way in which Blossom danced. Blossom did not have as much fast movement as the girl from club Nikkis, so I did not feel the need to adjust my Johnson to enjoy the Liquid Lapdance. Blossom was able to straddle my dick perfectly and grinded very smoothly to match the song. There are various parts in this song when the vocals drop and there is nothing but a guitar/drum solo playing in the background. During the guitar solo in the middle of the song, I lost control and let Blossom grind me to a decent orgasm.

Overall Report: I think I got lucky with this experience because the quality of the dances were the reason I busted a nut and not so much the feeling of Liquid Lapdance. Don't get me wrong, LL felt very good but I think I would have had just as good an orgasm going commando during the last song. Also, since it was the fifth song in a row I was consciously making an effort to bust a nut. Blossom did a great job of straddling my dick and she prevented by dick from moving around a lot by dancing at a slower pace.

Experiment 3: Monday, 3:00 PM, Crazy Horse

Crazy Horse is a decent club for table dances and a great club for extras during the day shift. The table dances are $10 dollars all the time and cover is free before 7 PM. I thought I would try this club because I saved a lot of money on my last trip to Leather & Lace.

The following is a summary of my results for the Crazy Horse experiment using Liquid Lapdance:

Dancer Description: Cassandra, Mixed, MILF, 5'10, Black Hair, Fake D Cups, Nice Juicy Ass, Toned Legs

Cassandra was easily in her early thirties and approached me immediately as I entered the Crazy Horse. No small talk from this girl, I could tell she was eager to make some Cash. I found her attractive so I quickly agreed to some dances.

Lap Dance Results: 3 Liquid Lapdances, 1 Nut Busted

Now let me explain how I busted a nut in three dances because I truly did not think it was possible. First of all, Cassandra had zero lap dance skills and was purely about heavy grinding on my stomach. The only variation she had in her dance would be to shove her boobs in my face, then turn around and go straight back to grinding. I have encountered these kind of girls before and I knew just how to handle the situation.

After I was completely Hard, I knew I would have to look for an opportunity to adjust my penis because this chick was only grinding with her back towards me for the whole first song. Initially my dick slid between my legs and I could not feel any of the sensations of the Liquid Lapdance. So I decided to do the infamous "dick tuck" as soon as Cassandra switched dancing positions.

Now my friends comes the greatest discovery I have had using the Liquid Lapdance, so please if you decide to try this product please do the following as soon as possible. When I decided to adjust my penis, I did not do the normal commando "dick tuck" in which I use my sweat pants to hold my dick against my stomach, while still keeping my dick hidden. No Sir, I pulled my sweatpants down to the middle of my shaft and used my shirt to cover the top half of my penis. This is only something you can do with a condom on or with the Liquid Lapdance.

I was able to execute this quick maneuver as Cassandra took a break from grinding and went to rub her tits in my face. Now I would never position my dick in this manner going commando for the following reasons:

1. Too Much grinding might expose your naked dick and you look like a total creep

2. If you cum while your dick is only under your shirt, it won't absorb the cum like sweatpants will and there is a far greater chance it will leak on the dancer.

That is when I had the epiphany of how to use the Liquid Lapdance underwear. I knew that if I positioned my dick in this way using Liquid Lapdance, that girls who grind like Cassandra should provide some incredible dances. Boy Was I right!

It was a perfectly symmetrical grinding session with Cassandra's two wonderful ass cheeks cradling my dick placed right in the middle, firmly secured by my sweatpants & pressed against my stomach. Since I did not have to worry about sperm leaking through my shirt, I left only my shirt to cover the top half of my penis and let Cassandra go to town. The orgasm I had was incredible and I could tell that Cassandra felt the spasms of my dick as I busted a nut during the third song. She did not say anything but she did switch positions and smile at me after my dick stopped flexing.

Overall Report: I probably will not use Liquid Lapdance on a regular basis but I will keep a pair in the car for special circumstances. I'm used to going commando and getting lap dances from a variety of girls. However, I will only bust a nut when I get dances from my "freaky favorites" who don't mind me cumming in my pants during a table dance or cumming during extras in VIP. I will only use Liquid Lapdance when I see a new girl who grinds a lot and who I don't want to freak out if I bust a nut.

The Verdict: I am still a loyal fan of going Commando, and I will not switch to buying Liquid Lapdance on a regular basis.

I had to bend the rules a little bit to get the full enjoyment of Liquid Lapdance. I had to basically get a dance with only my shirt covering the Liquid Lapdance underwear to get the results that the website advertised.

If you don't take steps to secure your penis in one place while using LL, then your basically relying on the skill of the dancer to get you off. I found that if your going to let your dick roam, then the feeling of going Commando is just as good as using Liquid Lapdance.