Oh my God. I've been...

Oh my God. I've been to lap dance heaven.

I decided to treat myself to an end-of-the-year strip club extravaganza. I started at Mustangs, figuring it would at best be an appetizer. Cute young women, topless, very laid back. Nice start.

Then off to Fuego's, where I had planned to spend my evening. But since by 10pm there were 6 dancers and -- I counted -- over 125 men, the chances of getting laps was very, very small. I did get two laps, and both were decent.