Bu Bye Marios

After a horrible experience at Desires, I decided to go off the board and go here, like an idiot. I have been going here on and off since the Fuzzy Grape days, starting in the mid 1970s. Sometimes I like it, sometimes it sucks, and after my last trip it is off the list. Just a terribly run club. Things I didn't like before last Sunday: Metal detector and scanning licenses at night; sporadic lineups; too many days/nights where dancers pull a no show and it is understaffed. CR that is the most expensive house fee I have ever seen. Thigs I fucking hated before Sunday: scanning licenses in the day or you cannot buy a drink, then being lied to when they said it was mandated by a state law. 43 years of OUIL practice says fuck you, the law doesn't require it; fucking liars. Now to Sunday:

Layout: Parking lot is expanded and partly new pavement. Walk into the club and the bar is immediately to the right; walk through the metal detector (I set it off every time and never get patted down) get your license scanned and pay your ten-dollar cover. Large stage straight ahead. CR area which is overpriced beyond comprehension is behind the bar. There are tables with chairs and benches against the wall between the stage and the pool table and the lap dance room, which is semi-private is behind the table. When you get a dance, you have to stand by the door with the dancer until the song ends, then sprint for a seat. It is reversed when you're done. Laps are full nude- full contact, mostly. There is a small center stage, about the size of a truck tire in the middle where dancers can go up and dance whenever they want, in my mind, solely to pressure those sitting close to tip them.

Dancers: Hit or miss beyond belief. You can show up, like I did on a Friday night last summer, and find 10 girls to dance with, or like Sunday you might look at them, take your car keys and save your life by jamming them in both eyes. The laps are Providence contact with most, which makes it great on a good day and irrelevant on a bad day.