Stripper Hunger Games: Reno Edition

Pulled up to Wild Orchid a few Friday nights ago with the intention to just vibe, sip a drink, and maybe spiritually reconnect with a fake boob or two. I paid $30 to get molested by security and emotionally mugged by a girl named something with a Y. Reno protocol: metal detector, light groping, no eye contact. We keep it classy.

Haven’t been here in a minute and they’ve made some “changes.” New carpets? Maybe. Slightly less gross looking? Sure. But the most important update: they’ve got a damn taco truck outside now.

Yup. Nothing sets the tone for a night of regret like carne asada in the parking lot. They must’ve added it when business slowed down like: