sinclair's Review
I went to Mettler’s Bar and Restaurant at 18:30 on a Saturday night. Parking was free in the civic center parking garage across Front Street, which is a pedestrian walkway rather than a true street. There was no cover charge when I entered, but there was a $3 cover charge after 19:00. I was wearing basketball shorts, and this was not a dress code violation. Happy Hour was from 17:00 to 19:00. During Happy Hour, Sincweisers, other domestic beer bottles, and mixed drinks are all two for $7. After 19:00, Sincweisers were $5.50 per bottle. The ATM has a $200 maximum per withdrawal and charges a $5 fee. There is also a second ATM that dispenses only singles. It can spit out a maximum of forty singles per swipe and also charges a $5 fee.
Upon entering, there is a long bar along the right wall that extends all the way back to the kitchen. To the left, there is first an area with three pool tables, one dart board, and a pull tab dispenser. Further down on the left side is an area of tables for dining. In the back left of the floorplan is a peninsular stage extending from the wall with two spinning pole positions on it. At the very back of the club is the DJ booth and seven couches for lap dances. Mettler’s is more of a bar and restaurant with a strip club thrown in the back for entertainment. I ate dinner at Mettler’s. The food was excellent and the portion sizes were generous. I had the full beef commercial, which was a double-sized beef sandwich with a pound of mashed potatoes. The waitress was impressed that I ate the entire plate because most people can’t even handle a half portion. I told her I used to be a competitive eater with a few trophies on my shelf. The kitchen stays open until one in the morning. The washrooms are all the way in the back down a hallway on the right side. You piss into a cattle trough.
The sixteen dancers that I counted seemed to be a mix of every ethnicity and body type. I saw everything from a 3 to a 9 on my scale. Dancers seem to commute from the Twin Cities or Rochester. Stage tipping is pretty boring here. Most of the time, you are just throwing dollars on the stage and getting little in return. Only a few dancers would stick their boobs into your face. Mettler’s opens at 17:00 nightly, but dancers don’t start the stage rotation until 18:00.
–Sinclair Dancer Sheet–
Ash: White, slim, brown hair, small B cups, sinclair prototype, 9.
Bunny: White, reddish-brown hair, pierced D cups, heavily tattooed on the outside of right leg, had kid, 6.
China: Asian, average body, A cups, very flat face, oriental script tattoo down spine, 6.5.
Jade: White, black hair, B cups, wears glasses, neck heavily tattooed, both arms have tattoo sleeves, 5.5.
Lacey: White, blonde hair, brown eyes, saggy B cups, wears glasses, talks semi-ghetto, had kid, 6.
Layla: White, slim, black hair, B cups, big tattoos on both thighs, tattoo on middle of torso, dances to heavy metal, 8.
Riley: White, big body, black hair, DD cups, tattoos on both arms, mid-thirties or older, 5.
Ruby: Mixed, wavy medium length hair, pierced B cups, tattoo of a phoenix on middle of chest, twenty-three years old, 8.5.
Selene: White, chunky, black hair, C cups, flower tattoos on upper left arm, face is most attractive feature, 4.5.
Sway: Mixed, slim, small saggy B cups, butterfly tattoos behind left shoulder, 7.
Tiana: Black, fat, saggy C cups, big tattoo on back, had kid, 3.
Violet: White, wavy brown hair, C cups, looked six months pregnant, 4.5.
Zara: African, fit body, small B cups, tattoo on side of each ass cheek, 7.
Table dances are $10 per song. Couch dances are $20 per song. Dancers can touch the customers, but customers are not supposed to touch the dancers. I was able to get away with touching a dancer’s legs earlier in the night, but when a younger bouncer came on shift later in the night and posted up in the couch dance area, he yelled at me for holding a dancer’s calves while she grinded on me. Dancers seem to be honest here. I did not experience any overcounting of songs. Perhaps the DJ keeps a tally of how many songs each dancer does to discourage scamming and also determine the house’s cut of couch dances. I hit it off best with Ruby. I got a warm Louisiana creole vibe from her; sure enough, one of her parents was from the Bayou State. I ended up buying fourteen couch dances from her. The more I did, the better the contact and grinding got.
There is a wet t-shirt contest every Saturday night at 23:00. It is for female patrons or dancers from other clubs. The house dancers are not allowed to compete. Mettler’s needs to get at least four contestants to do the wet t-shirt contest, or it doesn’t happen. A lot of couples and mixed groups seem to come in later at night. There is a $200 prize to the winner of the wet t-shirt contest.
Mettler’s has been operating in Mankato since 1903. However, go-go dancing wasn’t added until 1966. Another business called Loose Moose Saloon and Conference Center is attached to Mettler’s and is owned by the same family. I had a good time at Mettler’s Bar and Restaurant. It is a fun strip club for a smaller market. The beer is cold, the food is delicious, and the entertainers are decent enough. The contact rules are strict, but that is par for the course in Minnesota strip clubs. Fully private VIP or champagne rooms would make this an immensely better club. I would return to Mettler’s if I was working within forty-five miles of Mankato, but I wouldn’t drive a significant distance just to come here.
