Fine time at the Outskirts with slightly alt dancers
The Outskirts is a club that is, appropriately, on the outskirts of St Joseph, Missouri. Given its somewhat remote location (being an hour away from Kansas City), I went in not expecting much, and was thus adequately prepared to have a good time on a consecutive Wednesday and Thursday nights.
The club itself is basically a big barn, giving it the feeling of being unnecessarily large. The main floor is about 50 feet wide by 150 feet long, featuring a stage with two poles that's about 20 feet by 40 feet at the far end of the room. The near end has a pair of pool tables and various tables, benches, and couches. Between these and to the side is a small juice bar that was only useful to me for making change for stage tipping. That's right, no liquor in the club! There is a small, fully separated bar inside the same building, but you'll have to go outside and walk around the corner. You'll probably find some of the dancers in the bar, and they'll even walk over with you if you're both in need of refreshment. It's a pity that the bartender, Megan, isn't a dancer.
There was a $10 cover charge on Thursday night, and supposedly $5 for Wednesday night, but I may have arrived too late on a dead night for them to charge me. The club is open until 1 a.m. on Wednesdays and Thursdays, and until 3 a.m. on Fridays and Saturdays. I had whiskey-Cokes next door with generous pours for about $7 each. Nude private dances were offered at $40 each or 3-for-$100. Hands are free to roam over butts and boobs, and there was no begging for tips after dances. VIP was offered at about $250 (for I assume a half hour?), though dancers can apparently set their own prices. Dancers also get to select their own sets of three songs for stage dancing, which leads to a wide assortment of music. It was refreshing to be at a club with full-length songs, from a dance value perspective.
The dancers had a wide range of body types, with several crossing firmly over the BBW line. There were six dancers on the Wednesday rotation and 15 on Thursday, and the ladies were predominantly white with two or three black or Latina dancers in the mix. I'm very tempted to say the typical dancer had an "alt" aesthetic, as tattoos were incredibly popular with the dancers, several with many piercings, too. The club was pretty slow on both nights I visited, with dancers probably slightly outnumbering customers. This gave the opportunity to chat many of them up, and the dancers actually working the room (rather than sitting to the side) were generally very chatty. A minor shouting match broke out near close on Thursday (1 a.m.), apparently fueled by accusations of customer poaching on a slow night.
Here's a summary of dancers I interacted with:
Stella (brunette, 6.5): Stella was a brand ambassador for me at the Outskirts, and the sole reason I came back on Thursday. Nice boobs, lots of tats, and a larger butt than I usually go for, but she was an effortless conversationalist. Her eclectic taste in stage music was notable, mixing Korn and Marilyn Manson with Lana Del Ray. Medium contact dances, but her fun personality won me over.
Jade (bottle blonde, 7.5): Jade was another club veteran and Stella's BFF. She had one of the better bodies on hand Thursday night, though I would have preferred her natural hair color and fewer face piercings. Not as outgoing as Stella, but Jade had a super chill vibe. Better than average private dances, but not quite amazing.
Ivy (brunette, 5): Ivy was a smart two-way conversationalist that I met at the start of Thursday night. Cute face, but larger with less-pronounced curves than I'd usually prefer. Private dances were slightly below average. Though her personality initially outshined her physical attributes, I was irked when she interrupted my conversation with another dancer in the bar later in the evening to ask for a drink. That's poor club etiquette, and perhaps unsurprisingly, she was involved in the closing-time kerfuffle.
Natalie (sandy brunette, 8.5): Natalie has a tight, toned body, and she put on quite the stage show. Unfortunately, she was very occupied with a regular basically all Thursday night. Her flexibility was mind boggling, and I'm disappointed I didn't get the chance to take her back for some dances.
All in all, a good time was had. The dancers aren't all supermodels, but many of them put in the effort to win you over. You'll have a better time, too, if you like slightly alt girls. I would return if I ever ended up back in town.
