Afternoons good for some, not for me.

PH is a small place on the southbound side of Route 130 in Burlington, just past the the used car lot that used to be a Honda dealership. If you're coming from the north (like most people), the most direct route is to take the NJ Turnpike to exit 6, and get on 130 south just after the toll plaza. Or if you want to trade fewer tolls for longer travel time, take the GSP to exit 129 for route 1 south, take that all the way down to 295, then take 295 south to Route 130 south. For everyone else, just get thee to Route 130 and go north.

There's a little entry way that opens up into the main bar, most evenings there's security that will wand you as you come in. But at least they're cool and professional and never give anyone grief unless they deserve it. The bar itself is shaped kinda like a capital "L", with stools all around. The stools don't have backs so you can't hang a coat on them. Along the right hand side it can get very tight so you might get bumped in to a lot. The DJ booth is immediately to the right as you come in, and there's tvs along all the walls, usually playing philly sports. Your bathrooms are along the left wall, fortunately they put up a wall and a curtain for the toilet instead of leaving it in full view of everyone and everything when the door was open. You have a stage in the middle of the bar with room for two women. In the far back left you have stairs up to the main lap dance area with 4 rooms, and the dressing room right before the stairs. The other two dance rooms are immediately to the left as soon as you come in. I always got a kick out of the sign that said "Go-go with class" they had up for a while. Lap dances are $30 apiece for 4 minutes, high for NJ, and you have a guy who watches the cameras and calls out how many dances you've done, that everyone in the rooms can hear. So it's hilarious when you hear numbers like "25", I could never imagine spending that much time or money with a stripper at the club.

I'm not normally an afternoon guy mostly due to work, but with an afternoon free and after reading some reviews on some of the afternoon crew, I decided to give it a try. First I tried out Sasha, who is a 6b/6f south american with long brown hair. Either I read some outdated info or she changed up her menu, as I didn't get any dfk or even otp rubbing, zero passioon, very mild by all accounts, so I quit after 2 songs. Then I tried Crystal, who is a 6b/7f U.S.woman with wavy dirty blonde hair. It was more of the same, but at least she made me felt like she actually wanted to give a good dance, still quit after 2. I finally got to meet Mercedes, 7b/8f asian which is totally my thing, dances were good but she wanted extra for a handshake. As a rule I've never paid extra here so I declined and stopped after 2 more. I wanted to wait on Devon, but someone had her tied up for a long while, and I'm not a fan of just hanging out for long periods of time here because of the dollar train. So I grabbed Cayenne, 8b/6f south american with black hair who has to be pushing 60 but still has the best body in the place, and she took care of me for my last 2 songs of the day.