New and improved Hamilton Handshake

It has been a few months since my visit to Bogarts and I feel an obligation to the overall community here to relay my experience. I think you’ll understand after you hear me out. For any of you that have experience with Bogarts or any of the other Hamilton bars you have to admit that one of the attractions is the Hamilton handshake when you first arrive. There is no guarantee that you will receive this greeting but no matter what happens during your visit it sure is a nice way to be recognized as a newcomer to the bar in this way. These handshakes can last up to two or three minutes and possibly longer and At least make it worth your while to have stopped in for 10 or 15 minutes if there is nothing else of real interest in the bar that day because we all know that you never know what you’re going to walk into in a Hamilton bar on any given day. Two months ago I received What I am hoping will be a new improved Hamilton handshake in the decade to come. About five minutes After walking in to the bar and sitting in one of the Tall stools that line up next to the main stage, I was visited by a dancer who asked if she could sit down. She was not bad looking but not my type so I tried to discourage her by telling her that I was just going to be sitting here for a long time enjoying my beer. At first, I was kind of annoyed by the fact that she asked if she could sit down anyway for a while but I didn’t protest and she sat down next to me and then proceeded to give me the standard Hamilton handshake I guess to help me change my mind. When this didn’t work after two or three minutes, the handshake kept going and improved instead of ending with the dancer leaving in disappointment. Her hand, to my surprise, slipped into my pants after she skillfully maneuvered her barstool slightly in front of me So that no one in the bar but me could see where her hand had disappeared to with really no chance for me to protest without making a huge scene....but I didnt have the willpower to protest anyway. So you are probably thinking that This is the new improved Hamilton handshake to which I referred earlier.… But no!....the improvements to the handshake had only just begun. After a few more minutes under the pants, without a word, this very determined dancer then skillfully angled her chair a little bit further out and then took my left arm and put it around her waist and into her own pants… Again without much of a chance for me to protest – especially because she had angled herself in such a way that no one could see where my hand was. At that point she wiggled around and maneuvered a few inches at a time until she had my hand completely underneath her butt with my fingers directly Where she knew I would like them to be. The entire time she said nothing and I said nothing but I did smile quite a bit trying to figure out what the hell she was doing with my hand until my fingers ended up on home base. Then We sat there, just like that,for at least two full songs -and I think I was the one who broke it off out of my own fear of being caught And blamed for the situation that I never would have dreamed up on my own. I really dont think any one could see where our hands were because of the way we were positioned next to the stage or I would not have dared to stay that way for fear of being kicked out of the bar.

I still did not go back for a dance but gave her a few dances worth of a tip for the best and most skillful hamilton handshake I have ever received. Can anyone out there report a better handshake?. I have purposely left out the detail on the dancer in order to protect her in case the story could jeopardize her job there in some way, but would love to hear if anyone else had a similar experience because it seems very much like she knew exactly what to do and where to position my barstool in that exact spot in order to provide a very very private handshake.